QDB: Submission Queue
About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search

AllBestWeekMonthRandom<Prev1..45678910..346Next>
#311308* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
Curtis E. Flush: every question on yahoo answers should have this included: "Update: Please note that I don't particularly care if you have any skepticism or critique regarding my motive(s)."
#311307* (?/18) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<blooperreel> everyone seems to be playing that new demo that came out
<blooperreel> pokemon S&M
<blooperreel> sounds so R-rated
<Sakori> safe word is pecha berry
* Shiro-- used bind ( ???? ???? ????)
<blooperreel> 50 shades of pokemon
<Bobbo> *squirtle squirtle*
<blooperreel> definitely did not see that one coming bobbo
<Bobbo> And that's how you get pink eye, blooperreel.
<blooperreel> and that's tmi
#311306* (?/23) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Limes> man
<Limes> this ddos is real
<hawk> haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
<hawk> what ddos
<hawk> wtf netflix won't load
<Talgie> that ddos hawk
#311305* (?/17) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<mattbox> someone give me twitter's IP
<hal9002> 192.168.1.1
<Talgie> twitter has my ip?
<hal9002> ya
<Talgie> gimme back my ip twitter D:<
#311303* (?/9) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Iridium> "Breaking News: UK security agencies unlawfully collected data for decade"
<Iridium> lol DID THEY REALLY NOW.
<monotone> spot of blather
<monotone> no wait
<monotone> let me go again
<monotone> Surveil Row
<monotone> there it is
<PlanetDollar> nice
#311302* (?/20) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<dn5> I have int start = 1476620495; and int end = 1476620495 (unix timestamp), but if I have int res; and then res = end - start, res returns 0 when printf with %d
<dn5> why?
<izalove> because it's the same number?
<fstd> duh
<dn5> okay thats not supposed to happen haha
<fstd> ,reset
<candide> Days since our last accident: 0
Comment: ##c at freenode
#311300* (?/15) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@gzip> still early
<@gzip> pentium4 on IDE disk only takes 10,000 years tocompile a mykernel
<@freq> still, that's really good drive life
<@gzip> ya
<@gzip> 60GB western digital
* freq buys one
<@gzip> nice
Comment: devoid
#311298* (?/15) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<d4> Oh thanks I only have the file from 2014-12
<d4> Is... is that list of changes... in Comic Fkng Sans?  (ಠ益ಠ)
<mrk> Yes, ACORD send their notifications in Comic Sans, in 2016.
<tcal> They want to maintain their normal level of professionalism I assume.
<d4> Oh dear. If only it were possible to stab a company in the face over the internet.
<mrk> Road trip?
#311297* (?/19) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Chow>: Im eating carrots and spinach
<Chow>: My diet is 80% vegetables
<RedFire1>: i'm playing Contra and Mario Bros.
<RedFire1>: my diet is 80% 8-bit.
#311296* (?/13) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Eric> Gtg I have do do my homework
<Eric> Ill do it later
:: Eric has changed nick to: quit
<quit> Fuck
Comment: Espernet#spacex
#311295* (?/15) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
[16:36:50] <RedFire1>: hello there
[16:36:58] <RedFire1>: there is someone in here named sephiroth
[16:37:02] <Dragon>: sup dragon here
[16:37:05] <RedFire1>: time to change name to "Cloud"
[16:37:16] <Dragon>: Cloud is taken by someone in #rshelp
[16:37:22] <RedFire1>: oh right
[16:37:26] <Dragon>: :P
[16:37:27] <RedFire1>: back in 1997
[16:37:34] <RedFire1>: he beat the fukc out of seph
[16:37:49] <Dragon>: sure but Sephiroth has had that nick for 11.5 years :P
[16:38:08] <RedFire1>: i have played too much FF7
[16:38:24] <Dragon>: happens to the best of us
#311293* (?/13) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<st> sounds like it's behaving like an optimizing compiler
<ma> it's php. the only thing optimizing about this is it shortens the wall time between my shots
#311290* (?/18) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<monoxane> Americans fail geography
<Khelpw> Yeah, generally it isn't our strong suit
<Khelpw> basically the map looks like this - New york, California, texas somewhere in the middle, florida's the donger thing and everything else is just corn and cows. Down south is where the folks come from who take our jobs, further than that and it's all the amazon rain forest or some shit
<Khelpw> up north we've got polite folks who care a bit much about hockey, maple syrup and mooses. and across the pond is a whole gaggle of "???" that doesn't really matter except that they all owe us money for being the best country in the world
Comment: Freenode ##sysadmin-casual
#311288* (?/19) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<jzk> the IT industry just makes the degeneration into fascism far too easy
#311287* (?/18) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<gnol> idk i never really notice height?
<gnol> i mean i dont date ppl under like 6'2" but thats just a coincedence probably
#311285* (?/17) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<MikeSpears> I got better performance with my Asus N66U than that thing
<MikeSpears> sorry, N66R (the U is the same but yea...)
<MikeSpears> can you figure out why I don't like that model number?
<xe0n> yeah
<xe0n> nigger
<MikeSpears> I was trying to not say that
Comment: Freenode ##sysadmin-casual
#311284* (?/20) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<jeph> i just made soem potatoes and eggs w/ poblano peppers for my daily meal
<jeph> i kinda dumped the cayenne pepper into the potatoes. on my hand and then in the potatoes....
<jeph> perhaps you can see where this is going...
<jeph> while they cooked, i figured o'd go pee real quick in the bathroom.
<jeph> did my bznz...
<jeph> all of a sudden my dick starts burning
<jeph> im like damn wtf! what have I done!?
<jeph> not realizing its the cayenne pepper
<jeph> so im like, wow this really burns, ill put some aloe lotion on my junk to sooth it
<jeph> all this does is spread it around and open up the pores
<jeph> and then my shit starts being like bawwwwwwwwwww your dick is on fire jeff!
<jeph> i gotta run off the stove...
<jeph> take a shower.
<jeph> the hot water makes it feel worse
<jeph> im already forseeing my trip to the e.r.
<jeph> soap.
<jeph> lots of soap
<jeph> and evrything is ok again. and it made me actually shower today.
<jeph> so
<jeph> but
<jeph> damn
<jeph> just damn, never felt that feeling before
<jeph> i didnt realize it was the cayenne at first
<jeph> i was like. well havent got laid in a month and a half it cant be any VD
<jeph> maybe prostate cancer
<jeph> maybe, my hernia surgery reapirs blew out
<jeph> or mayeb i disconncted my pee tube from my dick
<jeph> and im just peeing into my ballsack
<jeph> without any way to disprove this i set about trying to force a pee
<jeph> not having to pee i just my balls burning more
<jeph> which made me thnk o no the pee is going into my sack
<jeph> so then i chugged a bunch of water
<jeph> and pee'd , to my sweet relief.
<jeph> about then i thought, well it has to have been the cayenne
<jeph> and did the soap thing to save the day
#311282* (?/28) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<AndyWojo> If I were coming up with a package manager, I'd name it just
<AndyWojo> 'just install tmux'
<AndyWojo> and instead of a -f for forcing dependencies: 'just fucking install tmux'
#311281* (?/18) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<hobbes> You know what they say
<hobbes> You are what you eat
<Greth> That makes sense in a channel full of dicks and assholes.
#311280* (?/22) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<graphitemaster> why are women such cunts?
<eihrul_work> nature or nurture, take your pick
<graphitemaster> it's okay, I have a bottle of Bacardi 180, as long as she doesn't take that
* graphitemaster starts drinking
<eihrul_work> enjoy the coma
<graphitemaster> doh, it's 151
<graphitemaster> not 180
<graphitemaster> close enough
<eihrul_work> she did take it away
<graphitemaster> she took 29 proofs away
<graphitemaster> that bitch!
#311277* (?/17) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
Fyhlen | I'll be there for the American Vacuum Society annual meeting.
+Ghostdivision | ... that doesn't sound fun at all
&Kota | wow
&Kota | that sounds like it'll suck
+RhekarPhone | it sounds like it'd suck
#311276* (?/20) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@Talgie> I hate having to put pants on
<Jake2> Who are you talking to?
<@Talgie> Anyone who answers
<Jake2> So no one?
<@Talgie> You answered, didn't you ;)
#311274* (?/32) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< rsaarelm> I noticed bash.org has been removing some of the old quotes.
< rsaarelm> bash,org∕?777977 This one's gone now.
<@gwern> rsaarelm: I wonder why. if it was by anonymous, there can hardly have been a copyright takedown, and some mild profanity is not enough to censor it
< CoJaBo> gwern: They broke their database
< rsaarelm> Another gone one. bash,org∕?794379
< CoJaBo> Every quote with non-ASCII characters is gone
<@gwern> CoJaBo: why haven't they fixed it?
< CoJaBo> I submitted a quote telling them to fix their quotes, but it's been awaiting moderation for over a year now
#311273* (?/19) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< rsaarelm> I noticed bash.org has been removing some of the old quotes.
< rsaarelm> bash.org∕?777977 This one's gone now.
<@gwern> rsaarelm: I wonder why. if it was by anonymous, there can hardly have been a copyright takedown, and some mild profanity is not enough to censor it
< CoJaBo> gwern: They broke their database
< rsaarelm> Another gone one. bash.org∕?794379
< CoJaBo> Every quote with non-ASCII characters is gone
<@gwern> CoJaBo: why haven't they fixed it?
< CoJaBo> I submitted a quote telling them to fix their quotes, but it's been awaiting moderation for over a year now
#311272* (?/22) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@esch> do you think a deer ever pissed on that
<duckstab> on the mushroom? probably
<@esch> do you think a deer ever pissed on you
<duckstab> i don't think directly
<@esch> do you think a deer ever thought about pissing on you
<duckstab> i don't think deer have abstract thoughts
save page | share <Prev1..45678910..346Next>

About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search
14,531 quotes approved; 9,618 fermenting; karma: 191.2744