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#311622* (?/1) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<pikapika> Girlcocks are fucking amazing
<cheapie> THEN HAVE I GOT GREAT NEWS FOR YOU
<cheapie> *ahem*
#311621* (?/4) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<StriderHLC> Yesterday we learned that the president's penis looks like a cartoon mushroom, and it's already gone from Twitter's memory. :(
<YelseyKing> Thank goodness for that.
<dysk> I guess Nintendo fans apparently have little interest in political "humor".
<AmySaturn> two recent news stuffs no one needed to know about
<AmySaturn> the toad shit and beatles masturbation sessions
<dysk> Beatles... masturbation sessions? Yeah, I think I'll stay out of that conversation, thank you very much.
<dysk> Insert your own joke about Norwegian wood here.
<AmySaturn> yeah that's been done
<AmySaturn> also come together
<AmySaturn> a hard day's night
<AmySaturn> etc
<dysk> Memo to Paul McCartney: When you're being interviewed, you don't have to share every single thing that happened when you were with the Beatles. With some subjects, it's best to just... let it be.
#311620* (?/3) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<dysk> "Target is bleeping out book descriptions, removing words like 'Nazis' and 'queer'"
<YelseyKing> lol
<YelseyKing> I love overzealous auto-censors.
<dysk> That old joke about **** van **** just continues to stay relevant, doesn't it.
<YelseyKing> Yes.
<YelseyKing> Penis van Lesbian.
<dysk> Except in Target's case, "penis" and "lesbian" would be censored.
<dysk> I mean, one of the censored words was "stripper".
<dysk> Which isn't always about nude performance. Sometimes it's used for a tool (lol tool) that forestry workers use to remove the bark from wood.
<YelseyKing> t**l
<YelseyKing> I totally understand the reason why sites would do that, given that anyone who'd be so easily offended by certain words would be the same ones to throw a huge fit over seeing them.
<YelseyKing> But it doesn't make it any less stupid.
<YelseyKing> My favorite thing is when they censor a word with only a single asterisk. F*ck!
<YelseyKing> Like you can't tell what that says.
<dysk> "Holy sh*t!"
<dysk> And, of course, let's not forget ***an.
<Danika> Satan?
<dysk> (a certain country in East Asia)
<Danika> oh, Japan
<YelseyKing> The best censors are the ones that ignore spaces and punctuation, so you'll get words you didn't even type censored.
<YelseyKing> Like "cut it out" will be censored, because it ignores the space and sees "tit".
<dysk> Or "It's been 20 years since the release of Mariah Carey's hit", and the final four letters would be censored.
<YelseyKing> Yup.
<YelseyKing> Even better is if they're not censored, but replaced.
<YelseyKing> "It's been 20 years since the release of Mariah Carey'fecal matter"
#311619* (?/8) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@Wilber> Activity on gimpissues: Shortcut Ovelapping <https://gitlab.gnome.org/GNOME/gimp/issues/2183>
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: GNOME: Impossible to get infos for GNOME/gimp issue 2183: 404: 404 Not found
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: You've given me 5 invalid commands within the last minute; I'm now ignoring you for 10 minutes.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: You've given me 5 invalid commands within the last 60 seconds; I'm now ignoring you for 10 minutes.
<ankh> haha
Comment: #gimp
#311618* (?/4) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@nsnc> crowell is doing nothing, therefore crowell is doing.
<@Maczilla-> Induction is so nice
<@bt> Induction is not doing Allah is doing
<@aweinstock> Allah_ind = fun (P : Allah -> Prop) (f : P MkAllah) (a : Allah) => match a as a0 return (P a0) with | MkAllah => f end : forall P : Allah -> Prop, P MkAllah -> forall a : Allah, P a
<@aweinstock> I figured as long as we were doing Allah and Induction jokes, I could define Allah as an inductive type (isomorphic to unit, because monotheism), and take the induction principle for it
<@aweinstock> you can recreate it (with colors, even) with `echo 'Inductive Allah := MkAllah. Print Allah_ind.' | coqtop`
#311617* (?/6) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<StriderHLC> Aggh... I've had so much trouble focusing lately. :(
<Danika> me too
<Danika> (Katelyn and I dumped out all our alcohol last month)
<dysk> Me too. Rejoined Facebook earlier this month. With social media, it takes a lot of work to not be busy. ;)
<Yuri> Alcohol!!!!
<dysk> Am I the only person here who mostly associates that word with rubbing alcohol rather than drinking? ;)
<dysk> I mean, individual alcoholic drinks, I refer to by their names rather than the catch-all term "alcohol", which I'll always think of as a topical antiseptic.
<dysk> That's just my weird use of language, haha. Don't mind me.
<dysk> I've heard some cocktails are quite delicious, so I refuse to conflate them in my mind with a disinfectant.
<StriderHLC> I don't remember if it's Methanol or Ethanol that's rubbing alcohol as opposed to teh booz.
<dysk> Depends on what part of the world you're in, I think.
<ChiizuKage> I associate the word "alcohol" with the disk burning software.
#311616* (?/10) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<salcedo> someone came into #docker on freenode and was like: docker ♥
<salcedo> and a bunch of people dropped
#311614* (?/16) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
Beta: Remember, the sentences "Piracy is bad", "Please trade Windows for Mac/Linux" and "I hate you" all mean the same to me.
#311612* (?/8) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
caducity: I don't get juggling culture
agreeculture: probably better off that way
agreeculture: its basically just a progressive, creeping self hate
caducity: maybe I get juggling culture
#311611* (?/12) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
MartokTheAvenger: Had a line break and start spewing gas. Always fun.
MartokTheAvenger: Luckily I had the right male shear top to fix it.
SPIKEMARE: ...is that a tool
SPIKEMARE: or are you wearing a see through shirt right now
MartokTheAvenger: It's the top part of an emergency valve. It has a shear groove so it breaks at that point.
SPIKEMARE: oooh
SPIKEMARE: neat
SPIKEMARE: admitted, I had fun imagining you going "oh a gas leak, better get my see through shirt"
#311610* (?/9) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
02:18 CaptainJistuce lights the Kawa-Signal!
02:20 Kawa has joined ##higan
02:22 <@CaptainJistuce> You saw the signal!
Comment: Sometimes, timestamps matter.
#311609* (?/9) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<YelseyKing> We live in a society where one person has ruined things for everyone many, many, many times. And hell, they don't even have to be true incidents.
<YelseyKing> Like that poor hapless pizza place that was bullied out of existence because some morons looking for "lulz" decided to claim to other morons that there was an "elite pedophile ring" operating out of it. Connected to Oballaroros.
<YelseyKing> (Obama/Hillary/Soros. The evil trio behind every bad thing in this country. Allegedly.)
<YelseyKing> Also, the fake news sites seem obsessed with pedophilia, and are going the "DARE" approach with it. "It's absolutely everywhere! Everyone is doing it! Protect yourself and your children!"
<StriderHLC> That's part of how fake news operates; it's an accusation that people have an immediate visceral reaction to.
<YelseyKing> Point. Maximum outrage sells, and what's more outrageous than crimes against kids?
<StriderHLC> Yep.
<YelseyKing> The problem is, they're overmilking a dead cow.
<StriderHLC> That is an odd metaphor
#311607* (?/5) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Sonux> So, Sage, you had something important to say?
<Therum> Yeah, I'll be nice and shut up for it this time
<H_Hog> :o
<Therum> >_>
<Therum> No announcment?
<Therum> Or important thing, or whatever
<PkR> hey Therum
<PkR> calm down, please
<PkR> at least Sage is a respectable person here
<PkR> he creates beautiful music
<Therum> >_>
<Therum> I calmed down ages ago.
<Sage> I was pooping
<Sage> sorry
#311606* (?/11) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
Aragón: Like, one jokey channel a la menagerie is enough
Majin Syeekoh: numbers we need 15 rp channels
Caligari87: Separated by theme
Caligari87: Pony RP
Caligari87: Anime RP
Caligari87: ERP
Orobororo: Vore
Caligari87: VoRP
Aragón: Pony anime rp
Majin Syeekoh: 15 rp channels and 20 of them are ERP
MrNumbers: No.
MrNumbers: Don't make me delete this server
Norm De Plume: Oh, please.  No one on here ERPs
Norm De Plume: not even Wyatt ERP
Majin Syeekoh: i do
Majin Syeekoh: i haven't in a bit
Majin Syeekoh: but it's a good bit of fun
Aragón: God
Aragón: Kinda wanna see that unfolding now
Rebelle: Do I want to know what Wyatt ERP is?
Caligari87: I wish the :rofl: reaction sufficiently conveyed my attempts at not falling into hysterics at my desk again
Caligari87: Wyatt ERP fucking god
Caligari87: My sides
Comment: Wyatt ERP. That is all.
#311605* (?/9) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< mircean> I’m new to IRC, can someone see what I am writing?
< Sling> no
< mircean> oh
#311604* (?/16) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<TheVirus> So I had a girlfriend for all of 9 months. She dropped
by one afternoon when I was sick with a pan of brownies and a video
tape with the simpsons on it (my favorite show). so I start eating
the brownies and turn on the tape. midway through it, it cuts to
her sucking off some dude. he nuts in her mouth, she looks at the
camera, and says "you're dumped. enjoy the brownies" - and spits
the mouthful of cum into a bowl of brownie mix.
<alexandr-> you didn't keep eating the brownies did you?
<TheVirus> sure did
<TheVirus> i was hungry
Comment: Taken from bash.org
#311602* (?/17) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<F-Man> one time I did it while watching Star Wars (again, really horny) and I reached climax right when the death star blew up
#311600* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<yipdw> I use IRC via a straw
<yipdw> that's why it sucks so much
#311599* (?/19) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<G-Flex> I just got another scam phone call
<G-Flex> for diabetic testing supplies
<G-Flex> you can really fucking tell these people anything
<G-Flex> I told them I have "tons of diabetes" and that I am Jaundice McLeod at P.O. Box 1901098, Little Compton, Alaska
<G-Flex> I asked them if they'd be delivering the equipment, because I've been having trouble receiving deliveries lately because there was an accident at a nearby laboratory and time around me has been very nonlinea
<G-Flex> nonlinear*
<G-Flex> "last week I got a lamp delivered from Amazon five times in a row, and that was before I even ordered it"
<BW2> heh
<G-Flex> he transferred me to another person and I told them the birth date they have on file for me is probably incorrect, as it has changed recently
<Moodcarver> ah the good old days in little compton
<Moodcarver> the fried pea salesmen hawking their gristle door to door
<G-Flex> she asked me what time it was where I am and I said "well in Alaska it's like noon, where I am it works a bit differently right now, I can actually see two suns in the sky and I can't really think about it or my nose will start bleeding again"
<G-Flex> I told her she could call me back in three hours, she said yes
#311595* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<dokodonmystery> reading character descriptions of smash characters is so funny because it's like
<dokodonmystery> this is lucas, his life and family were ruined by colonialists and capitalism
<dokodonmystery> this is snake, he's a genetic clone who suffers from the cost of endless war
<dokodonmystery> this is king dedede. he loves food
#311593* (?/18) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<+Jigsy> I honestly rate the Emoji movie a ¬_¬ out of :>
#311592* (?/10) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<RenegadePanther> like korea has those one toilets that spray water up your ass
<RenegadePanther> it feels weird
<RenegadePanther> but you like it... so you start to question things.
<RenegadePanther> on your return trip from Seoul, you realize, you may never have that feeling of asshole water again, and you become incomplaicent.
<RenegadePanther> after a short while of using the american Johnathan Crappers, you realize you dont feel the same on your old porcelain throne. partially because it doesn't plug into the wall.
<RenegadePanther> You constantly bounce back and fourth from hopeful optimism that you will be able to order one. and then, crippling pessimism when you realize you may not be worthy of korean asshole spraying toilets.
<RenegadePanther> After months of this way of american life, you settle into a manic state, wondering if other seat-like structures will provide the same experience, yet; it never happens. Friends and family start to get worried.
<RenegadePanther> You finally hit rock bottom; you go into a life of crime, trying to get a hold. Trying to find your way to south Korean asshole-spraying toilets.
#311591* (?/9) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@swight> man, CNN is depressing today - anchors are bursting into tears talking about Bourdain
<@swight> url/3d-printed-house-concrete-the-netherlands-van-wijnen/
<+tr3> yeah, i saw some stuff this morning about it
<+tr3> they were having a hard time talking
<@swight> was just listening to an anchor mention his daughter and she just full out cried
<@swight> url/3d-printed-house-concrete-the-netherlands-van-wijnen/
* +tr3 smacks swight
<+tr3> damn disc keeps skipping
<+tr3> playing the same segment over and over
<@swight> lol
<@swight> url/3d-printed-house-concrete-the-netherlands-van-wijnen/
<@swight> url/3d-printed-house-concrete-the-netherlands-van-wijnen/
<@swight> url/3d-printed-house-concrete-the-netherlands-van-wijnen/
* +tr3 pulls the plug
* @swight has left #geekissues
Comment: #geekissues EFNet
#311590* (?/12) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Thatnom> my mom gave me sex ed with 2 stuffies on my birthday in the gift shop
#311588* (?/11) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@Splunge> grrrrr
<@Splunge> why does the scottie terrier have to destroy everything
<@Splunge> even stuff which should have been safe on my desk
<@Splunge> RIP Flexi octopus
<@Half> Because he's a terriorist.
Comment: #tsc
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