QDB: Latest Approved Quotes
About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search

TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random123456..583Next>
#311113 (9/13) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<case> it was a sad day when i realized i should solve a problem with a factory
<case> i have become what i hate
<kid_icarus> rip
<kid_icarus> AbstractDelegateFactoryBeanBeanRipRipRip
<mischa> lol
<ispillmydrink> AbstractDelegateFactoryBeanBeanRipRipFactoryPoolFactory
<master_p> You gotta have dependency injection in there
<master_p> BeanPoolFactory.newBeanPool(FactoryRegistry.inject(new BeanPoolFactoryReigistryContext()))
<master_p> Unreadable isn't good enough
<master_p> Gotta be untestable as well
#310643 (4/6) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dylan> i just got an amazing idea
<dylan> make a tea that is healthy for you
<dylan> call it Vitamin T
<dylan> get it?
<feti> This is going to be a slow day.
Comment: EFnet/#php
#308504 (22/36) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Pants> Hey Grue, so I figured out what was wrong with my chainsaw
<@Grue> Ja?
<@Pants> It turns out it has an on/off switch.
<@Grue> `lart Pants
BrainBleach brings in Charles Darwin and the Chainsaw of Natural Selection to have a go at Pants
<@Grue> More apropos, BrainBleach cannot become.
#305561 (18/34) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<xved> proteins are the most important thing that lets complex cellular things work
<xved> and there are so many and they all can do different interesting things...
<@Rorschach> Can they dance?
<xved> certainly
<xved> some of them can zip DNA too
<xved> where would DNA be without proteins? its fly would be undone!
<@Rorschach> Yes, one needs to keep one's genes zipped
#303649 (34/54) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Camille> I love my new job
<+ericc> where d'you work?
<Camille> it's a small coffee shop. doesn't pay much, but nearly everyone there is a gamer or irc'er.
<+ericc> nice
<Camille> yeah, we got busy around 1pm and it was loud cos of people chatting
<Camille> so one of the guys there shouted out "now I know how those marines feel when I hit them with a zerg rush"
<+ericc> hahaha awesome
<Camille> the manager heard him and frowned, I thought he was gonna yell at him for talking like that in front of customers
<Camille> and he just replied "man the bunkers and bring out the siege tanks!"
#311097 (110/122) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<photo> i poured my root beer into a square cup and now all i have is beer. please advise.
#310731 (18/72) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<asaph> So you're over a year and a half into your transition?
<Zyradyl> Yup.
<cjk> Okay so since you've been on both hormonal sides, is there any major difference between the two
<Zyradyl> 89.9% of the time no, except I do have to deal with some unwanted attention, which probably contributes to the 10.1% of the time.
<cjk> whats that
<Zyradyl> Well. Okay. If you had asked me what 2+2 equaled on a bad day where I was testosterone heavy, You would have gotten a "Four, You fucking muppet" and at the absolute worst, a punch in the face.
<Zyradyl> Do the same thing to me now, and I'm going to spend 30 minutes reducing you to feeling absolutely worthless, then say "Four you fucking muppet" and slap you.
<asaph> Holy shit.
<Zyradyl> I don't want to hit people as much. However, I want to make them cry so much more than before. Which i guess means 2+2 equals four, and a whole bunch of unresolved emotional issues.
#310381 (6/28) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< mcpherrin> dylster3: You can write rust that crashes the compiler pretty easy
< mcpherrin> It's really just the worst form of error message :p
< Sharp> mcpherrin: Well, it's not as easy as it used to be, to be fair :)
< mcpherrin> Sharp: the thing is that as you get better at rust, you write more well formed code and so crash the compiler less ;)
< mcpherrin> so it always seems to be getting better!
#309461 (38/64) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* strcat just has to figure out how to integrate it into the build process :)
<cmr> good luck
<cmr> those makefiles look like small animals could get lost and die in them
#307007 (36/72) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< Neoinr> Bust a move
< Bucket> mo  ve
#311257 (46/66) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nomikos> basically I don't eat anything which has had a face on it at some point
<edf> what if we could breed faceless cows, Nomikos?
<Nomikos> how would they eat?
<edf> tubes
<edf> high-pressure mush injected straight into their digestive stuff
<Nomikos> this is a "how many parts of a cow do you have to remove to make it stop being a cow" isn't it
<edf> no
<edf> just the face
<Nomikos> just genetic-engineer some trees to grow burgers
<edf> what if the trees grow faces?
<Nomikos> ...
<Nomikos> hence "basically" :-p
<Nomikos> faces implying brains implying consciousness
<edf> oh
<edf> duh
<edf> then just tranquilise them from birth, keeping them perpetually unconscious
<Nomikos> you are not allowed on the committee of ethics :|
<edf> aw :(
#311085 (21/35) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<kerio> i'm looking for a client that can use ecdsa account keys
<kerio> can be very barebones, in fact i'd prefer it
<kerio> initially i wanted to use gethttpsforfree but it doesn't support ecdsa account keys :|
<hl> kerio: My client supports ECDSA keys
<kerio> does your client do CSRs
<kerio> i'm all for the CSRs
<hl> no. Why do you need CSRs?
<kerio> because i measure my self-worth by how many openssl subcommands i can use in a row without having to check the documentation
#309037 (26/52) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<worf> goddamn how i hate DB2 ....
<worf> "LIMIT 2000" ... nope, too easy ... "FETCH FIRST 2000 ROWS ONLY"
#308964 (21/59) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Silentbobby> !fap
<Silentbobby> whoops
<nawcom> heh what happens with the !fap trigger
<vasego> A kitten dies
#304645 (36/94) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<PhoneBizarre> Atheist motherfuckah in the hizzouse REPRESENT!
<Reyendo> < atheist 2
<PhoneBizarre> PREACH IT MAH BROTHA
<PhoneBizarre> RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW!
<Reyendo> AMEN, BROTHER!
<Reyendo> LET US SING PRAISES TO THE
<Reyendo> FUCK
#303315 (26/86) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Griff> vuvuzela's are like children.. they can be annoying as hell until you have your own one
<Foulwynd> and then blow it..
Comment: #worldofraids
#311294 (29/79) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dante_Chaos> The phones here suck (company phones)
<JamesDR> you sure you're not talking into the vacuum?
#311122 (45/71) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kit> Is anyone around who has my nude pics who can forward them to someone?
#307670 (69/103) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< Novice> It's not a computer anymore. It's a member of Norton's botnet.
#297319 (23/63) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Samael> IRC i've found is a drinking game in disguise.
<Samael> everytime someone talks
<Samael> you drink
--- Ceo has changed the topic to: IRC: A drinking game in disguise.
#245213 (14/64) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ilanbg> dude, during the debate Palin was pwning Obama on the way he was voting
<ilanbg> and two or three times Biden just responded, "first of all, McCain voted the same way......"
<ilanbg> and I wish there was just a crowd there that could be like, "ohhhhhhh"
<ilanbg>  instead of a moderator, the debated needed an M.C.
<ilanbg> who could go, "oh snap, homie, you just got SERVED"
#310890 (46/66) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Odthin> dammit i just came out of the closet as a grammar nazi
<milaga> they are a little more fun than the grammar marxists
<Odthin> grammar marxist, do they try to share grammatical mistakes with the whole community
<milaga> but not nearly as fun as the grammar maoists
<milaga> who just say lmao whenever you try to correct them
#310879 (14/44) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tomaka> WebAssembly + WebVulkan
<tomaka> wooosh skyrim in the browser
<tzaeru> a browser in webassembly + webvulkan that runs skyrim
<tzaeru> :O
<tomaka> an emulator written in webassembly, that runs a PC, that runs linux, that runs a browser, that runs skyrim
<tzaeru> an emulator in webassembly, that runs particle simulations, that run a bunch of chips laid out to imitate the functionality of modern PCs, that runs linux, that runs windows emulator, that runs a browser, that runs skyrim.
<OmniMancer> an emulator that runs a universe in which people argue over how to run skyrim in a web browser
#310640 (53/79) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ChauffeR> what's the name of the mission that fucked up because they didn't use meters
<OyajiVyse> America?
#309272 (24/70) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<luckybunny> I know someone in this channel likes to do owl impressions
<iScream> what a hoot
<luckybunny> dammit
<Kneidel> I can guess where this is goig...
<luckybunny> I was hoping for someone to say 'who?'
<luckybunny> lol
<luckybunny> in which case they would have answered their own question
<iScream> i didn't think of that
save page | share 123456..583Next>

About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search
14,492 quotes approved; 9,687 fermenting; karma: 191.3975