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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..365366367368369370371..596Next> |
#304843* (?/30) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<apples> dheart, it costs $200/yr for the domain
<dheart> wow..very pricey for co.ck |
#304856* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<flyboy2112> ring around the rosie?
<flyboy2112> holy fuck
<Kait> that's the worst haha
<flyboy2112> that's like
<flyboy2112> that's like us singing a song about bioterrorism and teaching it to kids |
#304859* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* ~miek|shop urinates
* ~tidux plays the clitfiddle
* Jake|Newlappie (JakeD600@dongs-EFC8F2E3.dsl.wchtks.swbell.net) Quit (Ping timeout)
<~miek|shop> dongbanjo*
<~tidux> not banjo
<~tidux> compared to a clitfiddle, it's a dongbass
<~miek|shop> lol
<~tidux> the upright kind
<~tidux> and then of course the slut says "all your dongbass are belong to us"Comment: #wtfpwnt on irc.rubbermallet.org
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#304874* (?/46) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** BILLY_MAYS has joined #twokinds
*** BILLY_MAYS has been kicked by SlowFag (No zombies.)Comment: #twokinds
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#304875* (?/46) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<wabbit> he was after ya schlong dark
<Darkside> in this weather its more of a schort
<firestarsolo> +1 internetComment: WTB
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#304876* (?/32) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< hipe> yeah i don't care to work for organizations that are so "results" centered
< hipe> it's, like, a form of prejudice to be so biased towards workers who show 'productivity'
< hipe> "productivism"
< hipe> in the workplace |
#305101* (?/34) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*SCANNING FOR FICTIONAL CONSINSTENCY*
FINDINGS: Incarnation of Dreams, Albus Severus Dumbledore, Edward Cullen, Eleventh Doctor, Danny Phantom-Foster-Stalker, Ferb Fletcher ect...
Mixelica: Who decided it would be a good idea to cast method actors in these roles? |
#305170* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
BritishGirl#1: You are staying in Africa or months at a time? That sounds so scary!
BritishGirl#2: I know, but I should get through it...
MixieFox: *You guys could always just summer in your favorite places...*
Disclaimer: I don't recall exactly how long she was planning to stay, or whether she was staying in Africa. |
#305220* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dd7> i've developed an effective system to determine if you are healthy or not
<dd7> it involves only two things: a girlfriend and some poop
<dd7> if you can take a shit in the time you should be responding to a girlfriend's text message
<dd7> the answer is probably 'yes' |
#305229* (?/42) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Supergirl> xelados: If you think about it, the husband abuse is very rare and when it *does* happen the men cover it up.
<xelados> I'd rather die.
<Supergirl> xelados: They're afraid to admit it.
<xelados> Supergirl: Indeed.
<xelados> It's not as common as wife abuse
<xelados> For sure
<Hunterm> but it still happens
<xelados> But that doesn't mean it doesn't happen
<xelados> etc
<Hunterm> from what i'm hearing
<markatto> yeah marriage is scary
<xelados> Just because one problem is worse doesn't denounce the other.
<Supergirl> xelados: Most male spouse abuse is verbal, too, actually.
<Hunterm> men appear to be shat on in marrage
<Supergirl> xelados: Or rather it starts that way.
<xelados> Hunterm: They are.
<markatto> i've been fucked over by women enough to be pretty cautious
<xelados> Don't ever do it unless you have plenty to spare.
* jmad980 has to
<jmad980> Playing: The Prodigy - Smack My Bitch Up
<xelados> LMAO
<Hunterm> LOL
<markatto> very apropos
<xelados> That's gold. |
#305260* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
WHO DAT GONNA BEAT DEM SAINTS?
The New Orleans Police Department, that's who. |
#305264* (?/46) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Yrr> odra
<OdraEncoded> DUDE STOP SAYING ODRA
<OdraEncoded> Everytime you are like
<OdraEncoded> odra
<OdraEncoded> odra
<OdraEncoded> odra
<OdraEncoded> Its annoying!
<Yrr> how else do I get your attention
<OdraEncoded> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARgh
<Yrr> HEY
<Yrr> YOU
<Yrr> YOU THERE
<Yrr> YOU WITH THE NAME
<Yrr> THE ONE YOU DON'T LIKE ME SAYING
<Yrr> YEAH YOU
* OdraEncoded slaps Yrr around a bit with a large trout
<Yrr> ODRA YOU MADE ME FORGET MY POINTComment: From #FurAffinity on FurNet
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#305308* (?/46) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
~[Futterman]~: yea thats cool
Alp the Mentlegen: I could make a less colorful more blue one for you
Alp the Mentlegen: Or red
Alp the Mentlegen: Whatever you want :)
~[Futterman]~: You failed to acknowledge the fact that I have fucked a woman who is a professional in photoshop.
Alp the Mentlegen: >:(
Alp the Mentlegen: We'll I'm on my way to pro >:P
~[Futterman]~: Very soon
~[Futterman]~: But I had sex with her
~[Futterman]~: And it was nice...
Alp the Mentlegen: Lol
~[Futterman]~: ... so I haz free ticket.
~[Futterman]~: 4lyfe
Alp the Mentlegen: You shoulda had her shop you a ten foot penis
~[Futterman]~: OMG
~[Futterman]~: I will so ask her to do that
Alp the Mentlegen: LOL |
#305309* (?/48) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Godzilla> Every awkward silence, a gay baby is born
* earth has quit (Quit: Awesomequit)
<tvjunky> i don't think silence is awkward
<funktronic> Godzilla: good. we need more interior designers |
#305383* (?/52) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<%LEthaLity> On my Facebook home page, I see they keep announcing that it is now available in 57 languages. Wow, now everyone in Britain can use it. |
#305384* (?/40) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<UmbralRaptor> celti's parser Is not compliant with any HTML/XML standard.
<Celti> if it was I'd have to end every line with </Celti> |
#305389* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Qactis> sup nu
<KuntaLaRainbow> nothings up in me
<KuntaLaRainbow> I just took a shit |
#305411* (?/46) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<%Meow> VAT
<~Knoeki> Vague Arbitrary Taxes?Comment: irc.p2p-network.net / #zomgwtfbbq
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#305419* (?/50) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Sudos> do I want GRUB or LILO?
<AndyZ1> if it was GRUB or LOLI, the choice would be much harder
<AndyZ1> 'the choice' not being a petname for my penis, btwComment: irc.p2p-network.net / #zomgwtfbbq
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#305440* (?/32) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<patriette> I am on twitter, but have never used it to send anything. what can I do ? |
#305568* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nikon> i booted dban
<Nikon> to test it
<Xero> and you shot yourself
<Xero> in the dick
<Xero> with it
<Nikon> and it not only did a great job
<Nikon> at zeroing out my other computers hard drive
<Nikon> but
<jones> LOL
<Nikon> it also did well
<Nikon> at
<Nikon> zeroing out itself
<hysterix> lol
<jones> LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLl
<Xero> LOL
<hysterix> 0wnd
<hysterix> by linux
<Nikon> so now i have three unusable drives
<Xero> demolished |
#305609* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<fahadsadah> There was a fire alarm at school today.
<fahadsadah> Not a drill, and not a real fire.
<fahadsadah> Someone hit an alarm point.
<fahadsadah> Meaning the staff didn't know that it was safe.
<fahadsadah> I was in the Science block.
<fahadsadah> Which has one-way corridors and staircases.
<fahadsadah> Teachers were BLOCKING the in doors.
<fahadsadah> "There's a one way system. Go around. I don't care if it's closer".
<fahadsadah> One of them was my science teacher.
<fahadsadah> After demonstrating this blatant disregard for health and safety, she yelled at me in class.
<fahadsadah> For health and safety.
<fahadsadah> Apparently you shouldn't identify acids by taste. |
#305610* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<spinningcompass> Porn expands to fill the space provided. |
#305615* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<soot> mmm, my parents use vista and I spent ages fucking with them then gave up
<soot> ...that sounds wrong |
#305646* (?/40) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Piotyr> Shaqfu
<Piotyr> I'm gunna eat you
<Piotyr> Come here
* shaqfu comes
<Piotyr> ...
<Piotyr> Not gunna eat you now
<Piotyr> Not going to talk to you either
* Piotyr leaves
<+shaqfu> NOT THAT COME |
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