|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..75767778798081..596Next> |
#35000 (284/446) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<HowlinMadMurphy> And.. AcidRain.. Man, life's pretty sad when all your good memories are of the internet.
<znutar> hahaha
<NOOU|Sleep> Not really.
<NOOU|Sleep> Almost all my memories are on the internet.
<NOOU|Sleep> ...
<NOOU|Sleep> Holy fuck that's depressing.Comment: Discussing old times.
|
#31337 (283/709) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kode54> next quote up is #31337 |
#30175 (284/470) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Wikkid|Mikkr3igN> my power went out the other day. good thing my camera had a flash. i went to make a sandwich and took 90 pictures of my kitchen.... the neighbors called the police they thought it was lightening in my house |
#8217 (284/450) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<noskill> I was banned from my junior highs network for having every printer in the school print 5000 pages of "FEED ME PAPER!" simultaneously |
#3570 (284/470) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*** d6|GaiaN has joined #lesbians
<d6|GaiaN> lol
<d6|GaiaN> EVERYONE OF YOU ARE GUYS AND I KNOW IT |
#300125 (283/443) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
muffy: i would not date a chinese girl
muffy: thats a big red flag |
#299993 (283/439) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Dingo> I hate snipers <.<
<Starcraftmazter> I don't see any snip- |
#295506 (283/429) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
PartyGirl1450981: so I was watching this porn, right?
PartyGirl1450981: and I was really getting into it
PartyGirl1450981: and then I found out it was actually two guys fucking
PartyGirl1450981: then I came
PartyGirl1450981: does this make me gay?
GoKillPeople: Yes.
GoKillPeople: ...What are you doing tonight? |
#78595 (283/513) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<DinkyDogg_> worst geeky erotic fiction EVAR
<DinkyDogg_> vista as a metaphor for a beatiful woman
<proudfoot> vista is perhaps a better metaphor for a woman who tries to be beautiful, but doesnt succeed, and has many, many, issues
<proudfoot> and happens to be very, very, insecure
<proudfoot> she also has the annoying habit of asking you if its ok to do anything |
#69154 (283/509) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Apofisu> Allow me to sing 100 bottles of beer on the wall
<Apofisu> *ahem*
<Apofisu> x = 100;
<Apofisu> while(x > 0) {
<Apofisu> printf("%d bottles of beer on the wall. \n %d bottles of beer. \n Take one down, pass it around. \n %d bottles of beer on the wall.", x, x, x-1);
<Apofisu> x--;
<Apofisu> }
* Apofisu bows |
#60641 (283/511) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<shardz> my friend wrote a "compressor" in perl yesterday
<shardz> but instead of compressing the file, it just deletes it and replaces it with an empty file and sends the message "Oops! Compression failed!"Comment: irc.esper.net #ednos
|
#51373 (283/423) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
NES: you should do what I did and try to convince your boss to migrate their whole massive application from vb6 to .net
NES: tell them it'll be very easy
NES: and then leave the company |
#51190 (283/403) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<RPharazon> I was reading a rather nice article about suicide, and what the consequences were.
<GoneWacko> Well, generally, you die. |
#50221 (282/416) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Aeli> ...
<Aeli> now you've gotta be kidding me
<Aeli> I'm never using the ef name generator again
<Aeli> thicwang? |
#45116 (283/493) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sEcretz> One day a teacher went into her classroom and saw the word, “penis” written in small letters on the chalkboard. She erased it and went on with the day's lesson. The next day, she came in and saw the same word on the chalkbaord, but a little bit bigger. She erased it and went on with her lesson.
Each of the next several days, the teacher would come in to find “penis” on the board, a little larger each time.
<sEcretz> She went in one morning, expecting to dinf it again, but instead the chalkboard read: “The more you rub it, the bigger it gets.” |
#22682 (283/403) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Gordo> Me? I'm 23.
<Gordo> Wait, I'm 24...
<Gordo> Shit, it was my brithday yesterday!!! |
#20164 (283/502) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<KJ> I was in a shop in Britain, when an American tourist in front of me tried to pay for something in US dollars. The shop keeper politely told her that this was Britain, and you can't use U.S. dollars here. The lady replied... "But I had no problems in other third world countries" |
#11497 (283/440) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jre> There is no profile of a school shooter. They come from all walks of life, all religions; they listen to different music, have different crowds; they are just random individuals who cannot be determined to be killers until they actually kill.
* jre is now known as SoccerMoms
<SoccerMoms> WE BETTER CENSOR MOVIES, TV, MUSIC, BOOKS, VIDEOGAMES AND THE INTERNET THEN
* SoccerMoms is now known as Politicians
<Politicians> K |
#8471 (283/467) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sisko> Q. What's the height of conceit?
<sisko> A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.
<mmm> i do that
<mmm> "oh god" |
#74 (283/621) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<JCamel> heh, no, because i jacked off into his mom's black bra, and she blamed it on him |
#300976 (282/384) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<HalfNote5> From XP setup screen: "Record data to CD as easily as saving to a floppy disk!"
<HalfNote5> ... maybe it IS time to retire it." |
#111830 (282/490) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<tuxick> what annoys me a lot is idiot media crying "oil price up!! 80 dollars now!" instead of "dollar down! 1/80th barrel now!" |
#59556 (282/432) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Fire> When I code late at night, I find things in it in the morning like /** TODO -- something */ |
#57733 (281/445) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<FlaVouR> BTW Jewel == a South African Buddy of mine
<pinin> i figured you two knew each other since you are the only ones in the country with internet
<FlaVouR> pinin dont make me set my lion on youComment: #geekissues
|
#49246 (282/448) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sensel> check this out in google earth
<sensel> 0 16'06.63"s 90 50'44.09"W
<sensel> looks like 2 atomic bombs dropped on galapagos islands
<DaveB> or volcanoes, as geologists would call them |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..75767778798081..596Next> |
|