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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..173174175176177178179..596Next> |
#306764 (184/260) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@carlsson> Today is the birthday of the IBM PC and the Berlin wall!
<@carlsson> I wonder which one has caused most grief and suffering. |
#851 (183/368) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BlackDeTh> this girl was taking e for the first time.. so i knew what i had to do.. i made it a night she'll remember. (and me too :D
<lux> she'll remember it as rape at the trial and you'll remember it as consentual |
#1325 (184/390) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<immi> a penny for your thoughts
<dr\gonzo> a nickle for anal with your mom |
#2847 (184/347) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** mr_bill has changed the topic on channel #unix to Kids in the back seat cause accidents. Accidents in the backseat cause kids.
*** mr_bill has changed the topic on channel #unix to oops, wrong channel |
#3689 (184/343) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Valathar> No matter how depressed you are.... there is NOTHING that can't be fixed by titties. |
#3697 (184/341) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Villager> i was really pissed off this morning
<Villager> it was about 9am, i had a free period and i had just bought my breakfast; an egg, bacon & sausage bap, hash browns and a coffee,
<Villager> when the damned fire alarm goes before i've taken a bite
<Joshua> ...
<Joshua> you left the building just because an alarm went off?
<Joshua> with FOOD waiting for you?
<Villager> i put the hash browns in my pocket and carried the bap, but they all got cold
<Villager> i was going to stay but the security guards came round
<Joshua> oh
<Joshua> we don't have security guards just for fire alarms
<Joshua> "ya stay, ya burn" is the official policy i beleive |
#3920 (184/352) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<djLiKu> tell her to give me a blueprint of her vagina
<blazemore> wtf are you gonna do with a blueprint
<blazemore> construct your own vagina?
<djLiKu> yes
<djLiKu> it's like ocean's 11
<djLiKu> i'm gonna plan out first with a demo |
#4280 (184/356) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<O_6> here is my autobiography in 50 lines:
<O_6> wtf
<O_6> goddamn keyboard
<O_6> f;aowheif;oawuhe;faouw\hfe;oauwhfe!
<matts> interesting autobiography |
#4902 (184/344) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<iban> in 5 years irc will be obsolite
<ryano> so will spelling |
#8376 (184/363) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rach|Dressing > i just had the yummiest shower
<Rach|Dressing > it was nice and hot
<Fentom > ....damn it people prove that your hands ARE ON THE KEYBOARD after that comment |
#1302 (183/380) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<|Chris> okay...here's one
<|Chris> what's the worst crime you've ever commited?
<Guilty> I once taped a Golden Girls episode with only implyed oral permission and not expressed written permission |
#1557 (183/344) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Badforyou> Does anyone know where you can buy large, exceptionally strong plastic bags, fake dog poo, sulphuric acid, aroma therapy candles, and a ten pound dead doberman on the internet?
<freekoala> all but the dead dog on amazon.com i bet
<freekoala> you could put together your 'amazon.com' wishlist and send it to people. they will wonder about the theme, but keep them wondering. |
#1778 (183/422) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<wild> whats the difference between jesus and a picture of jesus?
<wild> it only takes one nail to hang a picture of jesus |
#2166 (182/348) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<grey> wow
<grey> i didn't realise afghanistan had enough infrastructure for two nights' worth of air attacks |
#2935 (183/325) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Object> booya my roommate, got in a fight last week.. this week, booya was starting a new job .. he gets in and finds out his new boss is the guy he fought last week, we thought it was pretty funny |
#3687 (183/375) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<OutLore> your the moron that believed us, i's not my fault your tent fell in the river |
#5786 (183/323) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<OneiWilly> i hate games that are always go get the red key
<OneiWilly> open the red door then get the blue key
<delay> yea
<Auger> yeah, i mean, what the fuck
<delay> thats why i didnt play resident evil
<delay> it was horrible like that
<OneiWilly> yea but there were zombies
<delay> I was like "damn i'd hate to live here and have to go to the bathroom"
* delay runs down the hall, grabs the blue gem, opens door one, runs back to get SHIELD EMBLEM makes it to the bathroom door... wets himself
<Auger> no you pee inside the emblem and it opens up a secret passage |
#7022 (183/324) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Ac3d> uh oh, i think i just sent a nude pic of me to my friends mom |
#7658 (183/375) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<xwred1> my friend on aim is annoying me I want to hack them
<xwred1> I just want to get in and format his drive
<xwred1> I asked him for his address ip and he said its 127.0.0.1
<TheOnyx> heh
<TheOnyx> Do you know what 127.0.0.1 is?
<xwred1> its an address
<xwred1> loopback, or something, right?
<xwred1> it loops to him, then back to me
<xwred1> thats how I can hax0r him |
#7845 (183/342) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
.... I love the way Microsoft follows standards. In much the same manner
that fish follow migrating caribou.
-- Paul Tomblin, alt.sysadmin.recovery |
#34787 (183/405) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<W_J_F> where can i get a wav - mp3 converter?
<@eggburt> google lame
<W_J_F> where can i download google egg? |
#34829 (183/441) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CptnSwede> _________
<CptnSwede> < Hi, Lk! >
<CptnSwede> ---------
<CptnSwede> \ _
<CptnSwede> \ (_)
<CptnSwede> \ ^__^ / \
<CptnSwede> \ (oo)\_____/_\ \
<CptnSwede> (__)\ ) /
<CptnSwede> ||----w ((
<CptnSwede> || ||>>
<LkButter1> Ah, Captain Swedish Porno
<LkButter1> We meet again!Comment: #ramen
|
#35472 (183/409) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<livewireo> i tried, but i couldnt see my penis through all the vomit
<everest> ah, college |
#35593 (182/396) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
-> SignOff boby|sleep: #afterhoursdjs (Connection reset by a lil mexican with wire clippers.) |
#35782 (183/299) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DX|> what do they call those things on the side of the road? that make annoying noises when you drive over them, so you don't fall asleep?
<DX|> other than children? |
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