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#41108 (195/345) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<WeirdHat> so I went to the LOTR thing at the museum of science
<WeirdHat> when we were in the line to get in
<WeirdHat> there was a guy at the front with a microphone to tell us all the rules, no cameras allowed and things like that, blah blah blah
<WeirdHat> when he started, the volume on the microphone was set too loud
<WeirdHat> so he joked "THIS IS GOD" and then fixed the volume and went on with the telling us stuff
<WeirdHat> and when he was done
<WeirdHat> a little girl behind me said
<WeirdHat> "was that REALLY god?" |
#46477 (195/337) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Goat> see? Look at how cool it is. That's why i put it as my homepage.
<girl__> Goat: change your nick. "Goatse? Look at how cool it is. That's why i put it as my homepage."
*** "Goat" is now known as "Tub"
<Tub> Girl, I love thee for pointing that out. =) |
#49161 (195/405) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Shi> I had a weird thought today.
<Shi> You know how in medieval times they bled people to cure disease?
<Shi> What if you had genital warts?
<Interitus|> <_>
<Anaz> shi is not allowed to think any more. |
#55144 (195/359) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<bigwoodthing> ugh what a morning
<bigwoodthing> a co-worker was all excited cuz her mom, dad, and daughter were on the front page of the newspaper
<bigwoodthing> so shes showing everyone in the office, bragging about how cute her baby looks
<bigwoodthing> she finally shows me the paper, and guess what the article theyre in is about
<taylor-made> what?
<bigwoodthing> the poverty that is gripping the area due to several large companies cutting jobs :(
<taylor-made> ...
<bigwoodthing> what the hell are you supposed to say in that situation?
<bigwoodthing> "sorry that your family is in a bad spot financially, but on the bright side your daughter is SOOOOO CUTE!" |
#57948 (195/357) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< bubbly> Vermont Democrats Call for Bush Impeachment
< clem> impeachment always provokes the image of a president stoned to death with peaches |
#62191 (195/373) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<&Erik> you at work?
<linuxillegal> yes
<&Erik> i didnt think bike stealing had internet access
<linuxillegal> when you franchise, theres possibilities |
#67338 (195/367) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jsz> i wouldnt hit it
<jsz> looks like everyone else already has
<sour> she's a virgin
<jsz> bullshit.
<jsz> shes been down on more guys than a small site under the slashdot effect |
#34248 (194/416) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Phucker> Calling people by their real-names on IRC is a violation of RFC1459. |
#34357 (194/336) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Sooozi> any1 here into Coprophagy?? (if you don't know what it is, don't ask, you are NOT into it!)
* Impi sets mode: +b *!*@36559CAD.FF54522A.212ECD0E.IP
* Sooozi was kicked by Impi (eat shit) |
#46698 (194/402) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
-dmwaters- {global notice} Hi all.... erm, that netsplit was my fault.... I accidently killed the wrong process on the wrong box. I'm very very sorry for that... Thank you for your patience, and thank you for using freenode... |
#48575 (194/360) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<VVelox_w> hey all
<VVelox_w> why would a memory address ever be negative?
<Heero> because it's depressed
<Heero> I mean, who isn't now a daysComment: #freebsd on ECNet
|
#53019 (194/286) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Currawong> I have a 486 in the corner that's been compiling XFree since 1999.
<@Currawong> Every so often I think about cancelling the job, but then I'd have to go shop for a space heater. |
#301752 (194/290) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Flickerdart> See, Russian doesn't have an X. It uses ks instead.
<Flickerdart> It saves room in the alphabet for more useful letters.
<Flickerdart> Like 3. |
#303729 (194/268) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+BadFish> Mmmm, emma watson
<+Watson> I find it disturbing that I was highlighted by your sexual fantasies |
#307795 (194/230) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< craige> We officially stopped supporting ie6 at work this year
< craige> I think I almost cried
< craige> Not because I was happy, but because I now had a timeframe for how long I'd be supporting ie7 |
#344 (194/444) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<concubine> NO CAPSLOCK! I AM UKRAINE |
#897 (194/426) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<two-c00l> i met eminem yesterday
<rick^MD> eminem is gay, and i hate gays
<two-c00l> eminem is not gay!
<rick^MD> yes he is
<two-c00l> prove it
<rick^MD> ok... i had anal sex with him last week
<two-c00l> um i thought you said you hate gays?
<rick^MD> oh umm... i was just making sure he was gay so i could prove it to you |
#1447 (194/361) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<curiosity> I can't wait til' we can directly interface to the brain - that way the voices in my head can talk on IRC. |
#1987 (194/376) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<dr\gonzo> dance like nobodys watching
<dr\gonzo> work like you don't need the money
<dr\gonzo> jack off like nobody's home |
#5604 (194/348) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<neo[soul]> people cant take jokes anymore
<neo[soul]> this lady at work brought her dog in
<neo[soul]> and i stared at it and said "yummy"
<neo[soul]> and she got scared and walked off
<neo[soul]> fucking idiot |
#7119 (194/356) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Philly_B> <--------->
<Philly_B> hmm...
<Philly_B> the set of all real numbers
(*michael) The set of all real numbers, now only $99.99! Order now and get a complimentary imaginary number commemorative plate free with your order. |
#7936 (194/392) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*** Quits: TITANIC (Excess Flood) |
#8662 (194/310) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<iggypop> i told my gf some shit when i was drunk, and now she's like "you weren't just saying that because you were drunk, were you?"
<iggypop> and i don't have a fucking clue what i said |
#11122 (194/361) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Super_User_2> the very first time I practiced driving I scared the shit
out of my dad. It was a manual transmission truck. I had it in first and
tired to shift, but the timing on the clutch was fucked up and it just
spun, but the pedal was lighter then I thought and I floored it. The
truck sounded like it was doing 90 and my nervous laugh sounded maniacal.
He just screamed "NOOOOOOOOOO!" as we moved about 1/2 mile an hour...
he drove home. |
#11246 (194/338) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Saber> help me
<Saber> I just ate a fortune cookie
<Saber> But I don't remember taking the fortune out |
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