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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..149150151152153154155..596Next> |
#57554 (203/409) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<MarkTheMeS> Sharon Stone looked a little like Kelly Ripa on Letterman the other day.
<Eternal_Sunshine_Mind> she reminds me too much of an aunt of mine. so kinda creepy.
<MarkTheMeS> Single aunt?
<Eternal_Sunshine_Mind> 5 kids married
<Eternal_Sunshine_Mind> 6 kids*
<monolithblue> wow, that was fast work
<MarkTheMeS> yikes
<Junk> she just shoot out another one?! |
#171592 (203/353) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Jonis> fuckit
<Jonis> going out for a pack of fags
<stan> leaving efnet to find a pack of fags? seems counterproductive.Comment: efnet #ampedout
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#300571 (203/345) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<thetooth> you know what makes me angry?
(haro) thetooth, cavities? |
#303376 (203/425) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(@who-ha) Random story time, okay.
(@who-ha) I'm like, 10 years old
(@who-ha) I just got my first bottle of cologne, right
(@who-ha) so I'm playing around with it
(@who-ha) sprayed it everywhere
(@who-ha) so I put some in a cup
(@who-ha) and stick my dick in it.
(@who-ha) I cried myself to sleep.
(@Sanitized) ........
(@who-ha) I'm dead serious. |
#304172 (203/297) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<teapot> and i have a fantasy about having 2 men at once: one for cooking, and one for cleaning
<Wolfram> teapot - yes, but what do you do after you've cooked the first man?
<LionMan> clean the other one, of course |
#3902 (203/377) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+Tre> how do I get girls to have sex with me?
<+sp00n> show them software you have written..woman go wild for that kind of stuff
<+Tre> for real? how should i show them? do I carry my laptop around and show random woman?? |
#6828 (203/334) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tweet> does n e one else's gf ever told them they wanna fuck you with a strapon?
<Nekorin> Good news, Tweet, you have a girlfriend.
<Nekorin> Bad news, she's thinks you're gay. |
#11036 (203/357) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Swamp|haircut> omg @ big breasted hairdressers
*** Swamp|haircut is now known as Swamp
<Swamp> whenever she leaned over it looked like i was wearing a mickey mouse hat |
#14205 (203/403) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hoche> heredocs, theredocs, everwhereadocsdocs
<geo> old macdonald had a server farm
<geo> He eyed the I/O |
#17380 (203/364) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<SLC> there is a new mp3 addon in the defalt mIRC-releases!!
<SLC> if ya wan to hear a Backstreet Boys song then type /quit playing games with my heart
<SLC> some guy i just talked to said so!! he said it only worked with that song at first, to make it active!!
*** SLC (badass@pc248.cab60a.comtrade.ee) Quit (playing games with my heart) |
#20900 (203/385) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<SomeGuy> My computer has no firewalls. It is protected by a thin layer of cheese
<screevo> Well, thats gouda, someguy
<SomeGuy> RIMSHOT!
<Treen> ...
<screevo> what type of cheese?
<SomeGuy> Wisconsin Cheddar
<screevo> heh. thats very sharp of you
<screevo> being the religious guy I am, i use swiss
* SomeGuy snorts
<screevo> I like it holy, ya know.
<SomeGuy> oh the puns
<screevo> when I was more of an emokid, i used bleu cheese...it seemed to fit the mood.
<screevo> one day, i wondered what happened if I took the cheese protection off, but was too scared to try
<screevo> so eventually, i munsteared up the courage to do it...
<SomeGuy> oh my god
<Treen> damn you. damn you straight to hell.
* SomeGuy Quit (Quit: Avante!)
<screevo> think we were too...cheesey for him? |
#24405 (202/370) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<carhartt> I would hate to be a op around here. It's be like running a daycare center for "special" children, except without the feeling that you're doing something worthwhile. |
#26243 (203/391) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Princess Ryo: lindsay, you're not good at keeping secrets at all.
SynistraDeath: rob my dad is in here
SynistraDeath: shut up
Princess Ryo: LINDSAY
Princess Ryo: EVEN IF WE ARE OCEANS APART
Princess Ryo: I STILL WANT TO BE WITH YOU FOREVER
SynistraDeath: shut up
Princess Ryo: SEND ME MORE LETTERS
Princess Ryo: AND MORE PANTIES
SynistraDeath: ROB SHUT THE FUCK UP
Princess Ryo: PREFFERABLY SOILED PLZKTHX |
#30645 (203/361) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* +Yardbomb tries to make his cat swear fealty.
<+Yardbomb> my arm is bleeding :( |
#13063 (202/353) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hawker> just grab a gun then...
<hawker> end ur misery...
<TomServo> shooting my boss?
<TomServo> good idea |
#14562 (201/381) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Santa_Claus> FOR YOU, LEMMER... A LOT OF BEER
<lemmer> HOORAY
<Santa_Claus> FOR YOU, COOLZX... A GIRLFRIEND
<coolzx> NOW I HAVE 34
<Santa_Claus> FOR YOU, BENCO... A BOYFRIEND
<Benco> ^_^ |
#14668 (202/406) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
toAzron1:Did you ever notice, when you are sitting at a red light, that when the person in front of you pulls up a couple of inches, you are compelled to move up too? Do we really think we are making progress toward our destination? "Whew, I thought we would be late, but now that I am nine inches closer, I can stop for coffee and a danish!" |
#18420 (196/411) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Work|Calrathan> "there are 237,482 people in line infront of you. Do you wish to wait 525 hours to start your download?" |
#19136 (203/372) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CaptainCasual> /me thrusts doors open vilolently
<CaptainCasual> FINALY
<NickBlasta> coming out of the closet?
<[H]Pogo> hahaha |
#23916 (202/329) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CommanderStab> When I was young I thought being a chemist just meant mixing random chemicals together and seeing what happened
<CommanderStab> So I wanted to be one, so when I was young I went to the bathroom and mixed together every single thing I could find
<CommanderStab> I called it "Sparkle-shine shampoo" and tested it out on myself
<CommanderStab> I've had dandruff ever since and anti-dandruff shampoo doesn't help >__<
<CommanderStab> It didn't make my hair sparkle-shine, either ;___; |
#26327 (202/358) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DigDug> deth needs to get in touch with his inner child
<BlackDeth> i tried touching my inner child and he threatened to bring statuatory rape charges against me |
#27265 (202/350) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(@Mc-Taz) anyone know this IP? 206.204.10.200
(@Mc-Taz) i should hack the hacker trying to hack me
(+Tempus) omg dude, your a dumbass taz
(+Tempus) * Resolved 206.204.10.200 to security.symantec.com |
#28743 (202/360) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<WaSp> nice day outside
<WaSp> w00t
<WaSp> spring break soon
<WaSp> doubel w00t
<WaSp> no parents home over spring break
<WaSp> triple w00t
<@HamWork> no poontang over spring break
<@HamWork> lose 3 woots |
#29818 (201/541) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Optima|Kraft> http://edition.cnn.com/2003/TECH/ptech/10/01/g3.health.reut/index.html
<Parak> great
<Parak> soon we're all going to be mutants
<Optima|Kraft> tru
<Matrim> However, cognitive functions such as memory and response times were boosted by both 3G signals and the current signals, the study found. It said people became more alert when they were exposed to both.
<Matrim> fuckin' sweet
<Matrim> i guess this explains japan
<Parak> However, reproductive functions such as erection and ejaculation times were boosted by both hentai and the anime signals, the study found. It said people became more horny when they were exposed to both.
<Parak> i guess this explains japan
<Parak> :/ |
#30609 (202/410) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<cdowdsux> So my friend was telling me about how he tried to commit suicide by taking 20 Advil...so I was just like.. "Dude, why take 20 Advil when you could have just taken 3 Aleve?" |
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