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#310724 (9/31) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ceren> actually it's more like when a cat eats tinsel
<ceren> and you have to pull out lumps of hardened turds from the cat's ass
<ceren> that's what removing technical debt is like
#310773 (12/38) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Reaper> Why do we need a magnetic field in our giant spaceship
<Sleepy> we'll all be dead from solar radation in like days if not less
<Sleepy> I hope you're not planning to nav your ship by compass :p
<Reaper> And, honestly, the magnetosphere doesn't stop radiation. It stops solar wind particles from stripping away the atmosphere :-D
<WK> what relevance would a compass have in a spaceship anyway?>
<Dragonfly> how else are you supposed to draw circles?
#310774 (85/95) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Stormbringer: also valve are slowly dropping
Stormbringer: tf2 support in favor of csgo and dota2
Rapscallion: well it's 8 years old or something
Rapscallion: a child could have been born on the release date of TF2
Rapscallion: and now be old enough to call you a faggot on it
#310742 (4/30) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<dbelange> Front Row Education is seeking a Haskell Web Engineer for a full-time position
<lmt> i watched a short documentary yesterday about a guy in a paraguay slump who organized an orchestra where all the instruments are made from trash
<lmt> you could totally do that with haskell instead
#308528 (49/85) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< xiphias> sycobuny: maybe you can answer this
< xiphias> sycobuny: if perl doesn't have a JIT, how come it's so fast
<@sycobuny> because it spends less time on buzzwords and more time on just fucking doing the work?
Comment: irc.malkier.net #malkier
#304949 (72/116) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<dd7> lol i went to a furry role-playing chat once
<dd7> an op hushed me because two lesbians were going at it
<dd7> so i said "type 1 if you're getting off on this"
<dd7> and the entire channel was flooded with numbers
#304297 (80/150) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+mu> also, stupid fucking british dating system
<+mu> it's 10/10/10
<+mu> not 10/10/10
<+mu> geeze
<+mu> !
Comment: Posted 10/10/10
#307980 (22/70) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Stars> man I always feel bad when I install X on a new system :(
<+Stars> it's like I am ruining it
#304862 (27/69) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<FuegoFish> Natural Weapon basically has the following options: imitating an Arcane spell, or being a built-in Martial weapon
<FuegoFish> which means that yes you could have gunhands if you wanted
<FuegoFish> or a crossbow for a dick
Comment: #partyhard, irc.synirc.net
#296936 (37/73) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@timmo> a friend of mine whos in the airforce
<@timmo> says that since everyone eats mres
<@timmo> and eat at the same time
<@timmo> basically everyone has to shit at the exact same time
<@timmo> so theyll be convoying through the dessert
<@timmo> and all the trucks will stop
<@timmo> and doors will fly open
<@timmo> and everyones shitting out the doors
<@Rjx> meals ready to shit
Comment: #geekissues
#310235 (38/118) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<worstcase> once we look at women as 3d printers i think abortion wont be as much of a big deal
#310784 (-52/74) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Xena> just make sure to reduce your wildly using of things just because they are cool
<Xena> a filter like that will get you far
#310017 (21/89) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<nardil>how do ya figure out a womams ring size without her knowing?
<nardil>can u tell by measuring her nipples?
#308993 (64/88) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<PL> you really dont need pickup lines in Finland
<PL> It was really romantic how i met my wife
<PL> i found her puking at my bathroom (we had my friends 20yo party here)
<PL> that was love at first sight <3
#308226 (71/139) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Jax184> A poem in Punctuation.
<Jax184> ^<@<.@* (Hat less at less point at star)
<Jax184> }"_# | (Backbrace double base pound space bar)
<Jax184> -@\$&/_% (Dash at cash and slash base rate)
<Jax184> !( @|=> (Wow open tab at bar is great)
<Jax184> ;`+\$?^? (Semi backquote plus cash huh DEL)
<Jax184> ,#"~|)^G (Command pound double tilde bar close BEL)
#304896 (53/105) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<red_delicious> slenderbot, you're growing up so fast!
#309073 (27/63) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kyre> thou shalt not lay out thine floating point in any way other than the direction specified by ieee 754Comment: #darkplaces
#310850 (-4/42) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Mr-Ben> Man, forgot about theguy finding God. A full week now.
<Samwise> He hasn't found him after a week?
<Mr-Ben> Evidentally not.   Probably still looking.
<zompist> one whole week of god. better crack a window...
<Samwise> Man, you can't just look in churches, either.
<Mr-Ben> Some people look at the bottoms of whiskey bottles.
<jacquilyn> You can't find God in the bottom of a whiskey bottle, by the time you get to the bottom, he's already been poured out into the glass...
#310743 (43/55) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<l0de> Notice to IT staff. As of today administrators are strictly forbidden from assigning passwords which are not randomly generated. Assigning users passwords which contain obfuscated political statements (example NRA43V3R! , 084^^4=L|Z4RD ) will be grounds for disciplinary action.
<l0de> so there's another thing I ruined for everyone
<l0de> for like 6 months straight I assigned every user the password: "password187!
<l0de> and everyone was logging into everyone else's accounts and creating havoc
<l0de> it was gr88
#309232 (39/75) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Odd> So someone from customer service at work forwarded me this e-mail:  "Thank you for the confirmation of my book order, but you can save yourself and me a lot of time by not blowing up your schemes to 'help the environment.'  What you call 'help the environment,' I call a Jewish communist plot to destroy nations and topple freedom.  So spare me the smug rhetoric."
#305654 (44/92) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<IMMJR> Nice knew name |xjojox|
<IMMJR> Don't quite understand what the |'s are for
<|xjojox|> so the x's dont fall off
#303253 (39/69) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Artifice> I'm a little confused as to how E=MC^2 though. If they cannot be converted, how can they be equivalent
<@jey> energy and matter can interconvert
<Artifice> That's what I thought
<ttvd> prove it
<Artifice> I'll book the LHC. The 12th work for you?
#311147 (25/49) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<BaloneyGeek> TIL Samsung has a fashion division
<Fuchs> well, they make wearables
<BaloneyGeek> Also clothes, apparently
<BaloneyGeek> They also make military hardware
<BaloneyGeek> And they, in some capacity, were fundamental to the building of both the Petronas Twin Towers and the Mia Khalifa
<BaloneyGeek> Err... Burj Khalifa
#310968 (44/54) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Thugzilla> jesus
<Thugzilla> i just won the hardest battle of real life
<Thugzilla> internet was down all day, so i went upstairs knocked, [Redacted 1] answered and i told him to plug the ethernet cable back in
<Thugzilla> he didnt
<Thugzilla> 2 hours later i knocked again and no one answered, even tho i can hear footsteps
<Thugzilla> i knocked like 20 times still no one answers
<Thugzilla> i flip the breaker for their fridge and living room, go back upstairs, knock again and [Redacted 2] answers within 2 seconds
<Thugzilla> now my internet is back
#310864 (51/63) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Raven> Is it still Passover?
<Kyol> Is Jesus still dead?
<Morwen> No Kyol, thats what Easter was all about.
<Kyol> Ah. So let me see. He gets nailed to a tree on Good Friday, spends a few days in a cave, comes out on Easter.. Then  what?
<hockwork> if he sees his shadow, its another 6 weeks of winter
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