<Plagman> well calls on my phone tend to panic its kernel since the last modifications I made
<Plagman> but nethack plays great.
<CStubing> man... just heard on cnbc.. "Let's listen in as the moment of silence begins."
<+anosou> You're like the best man around
<+anosou> If there was a god of some kind, he'd be proud to have made you
<+anosou> If internet was full of women (which it is not) they would sleep with you
<+anosou> If zircon says something is S-tier, you say it isn't
<+anosou> If you were black, the southeners would still like you
<+anosou> If you moved to Japan, you'd become tentacle pope of the world
<Tkavil> I have to type up a speech of my life
<Tkavil> about 2 minutes long in french
<DerKapitan> bonjour. bon nombre d'entre vous ne me connaissent pas. Je voudrais partager quelques choses. Je n'ai jamais su quel genre j'ai voulu pour être, ainsi vous pourriez dire que je suis niether. au moins après la chirurgie le mois prochain.
<DerKapitan> there. your speech is written.
<Tkavil> let me translate that
<Tkavil> hello. many of you do not know me. Let me share a few things. I never knew what kind I wanted to be, so you could say I am niether. at least after the surgery next month.
<Tkavil> ......
< adamkuj> are there any good open source tools for working with Access DB's (mdb files)?
<@Dopey> rm
<TugC> hey anyone want some freshly tested proxies?
<Syn> yes
<TugC> xxxxxxxx.com/xxxxxx
<Xero> i want some too TugC
<Xero> holy
<Xero> fucking
<TugC> i tested all of them today in charon
<Xero> HEY
<TugC> what
<Xero> ONE OF THOSE IS MY SERVERS IP
<Xero> YOU FUCKING FUCK
<m4tt> lol, still up huh?
<jm7316> There's porn to be watched, and damnit, someone has to do it
<m4tt> that is mighty selfless of you
<jm7316> I do what I can for humanity.
<m4tt> im not sure where we'd be without you
<jm7316> Overflowing with unindexed, unmetatagged, uncategorized pornography.
<squibbles> :o
<squibbles> Universal is producing an Asteroids Movie!
<~blue_tetris> It sounds absolutely awful.
<~blue_tetris> I'd shoot that movie, if not for the fear that it would break into three smaller movies.
<@jen> help my mom get a demonoid account? damn thing wont let me give her an invite since were same ip :-(
<+Ailieron> Why don't you just let your mom use your account?
<~Fax> then her mom will know that Jen's been dl-ing yaoi again
<@jen> the last time i downloaded yaoi was when mom forced me to find brokeback mountain
<Leitari> omg
<Leitari> king kong is long
<Leitari> ^^
<Leitari> my ass hurts
<Leitari> wait
<Leitari> that didnt sound right
<Negi`> one time I proved heine-borel for R^n by proving tychonoff's theorem in the finite case and my grader said, "Well how do you know it works for R^n" without realize I proved it for a more general case
<enigmo> good story
<purplepenguins> cool story, bro!
<Negi`> wanna hear a better one, engimo
<enigmo> yes
<Negi`> I fucked your mom in the butt last night
<skywalker> hi
<sexiann> hey
<skywalker> how are you?
<sexiann> luke, i need to tell you something
<skywalker> what is it babe?
<sexiann> i know i should probably say this 2 you face-2-face, but im nervous
<sexiann> we've been going out 4 a while now
<sexiann> and things hav been going gr8
<skywalker> yeah
<sexiann> and i think
<sexiann> i think...
<sexiann> i <3 u
<skywalker> i...
<skywalker> i don't understand
<skywalker> you can't have inequalities with imaginary numbers
*** sexiann has quit IRC (leaving)
<altoid> i remember once talking to someone at the helpdesk at ucsd
<altoid> i mentioned i was having trouble getting GNOME to work on Gentoo (never did solve the problem)
<altoid> (used KDE the entire time instead, out of laziness)
<altoid> and he was like "oh, did you lose your windows CDs or something?
<kollapse> There's just something creepy about an abandoned mental institution.
<Viperlin> kollapse: i'd say its creepier if your getting wifi there
xplicitbruno: can someone tell me whats wrong with this : $sql_table_teams = $table_prefix."teams"
Mango: Missing semicolon.
xplicitbruno: Mango can u tell me where exactly or just correct the line i typed above ( i am new at this so dont know much yet )
Mango: At the end of the line.
xplicitbruno: like this
xplicitbruno: $sql_table_teams = $table_prefix."teams"]
Mango: Oh, wow. I don't know what to say to that one
Mango: I was going to give you the link to a page of PHP tips for newbies but I think you may need more help than I can offer.
<Stormscape> Yo dawg we heard you like Macs so we only put one pedal in your car
<Wombat1000> if i'm ever pitching a show to a network i'm going to call it Previously on...
<Wombat1000> that way, i don't have to write any plot, i'll just recap what's already happened
<Wombat1000> and my sitcom is going to be called A very special episode of..., so i don't actually have to write anything funny for it
<cxreg> i'm going to go in to work tomorrow, and tell them that i'm going to fix bugs homeopathically
<cxreg> by inserting a syntax error once every 700 billion lines of code
<Reznor> I feel like a tool because I just ironed my shoelaces.
Mama: hi this is dad on the computer
Joe: hi
Mama: how r u
Joe: good good
Mama: ilove u and miss u
Joe: moving out tomorrow
Mama: moving to new dorm?
Joe: yes
Mama: do u need money or anything, this is mom telling me to say
Joe: no no i dont think so
Mama: thank u very much now i love u more
<Pryoidain> Alright, my QDB script is complete!
<asaph> QDB Script?
<Pryoidain> Yeah, see I got tired of the weird thing they use where 1 positive vote and 1 negative vote cancel out to give 0 votes in the numerator of your quote rating...
<Pryoidain> So I devised a formula. Positive Votes = Numerator + [(Denominator - Numerator)/2]
<Pryoidain> I then made a script that searches for my nick on QDB, gathers the various quote levels, runs the above formula, and then tells me how much people love me!
<cjk> Interesting. I may want a copy.
<Pryoidain> Execute Nao!
*five minutes pass*
<Pryoidain> Hm. It must have failed.
<Pryoidain> Either that or -pi people enjoy my quotes.
<asaph> The latter option seems more plausible.
<Pryoidain> Fuck off.
Alyssa: soo, how are we going to be awesome? i leave what we're doing up to you, cause i just sit around
Marc Truant: pshhh, anything
Marc Truant: we could watch a movie or hang at the mall. maybe chill at a house. fuck. anything!
Alyssa: okayy :D it's up to you
Marc Truant: you didnt catch that, did you?
Alyssa: ...oh
<Dr_Pressure> in Old English, a period (.) was used to denote the end of a sentence.
<Dr_Pressure> in modern English, "lol" is used to end a sentence lol
<Augustine> Did the day sneak up on you? :o
<Samael> always does
<Samael> most of the time i kick it's ass
<Samael> which is where night comes from
<fahadsadah> Write a small Windows application, that locks up and crashes (infinite loop or something).
<fahadsadah> Wait for the error report window to come up, but before clicking send, locate the report in AppData.
<fahadsadah> Fill it with the lyrics to Never Gonna Give You Up.
<fahadsadah> And that's how to rickroll Microsoft.