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#8504 (84/306) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dr_rotcod> my poo was white again. this cannot go on |
#8502 (157/309) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Doc> hmm.. AOL has this great new thing where you can chat with your friends online!
<Bru> yeah I saw the ad on TV. that would be cool - then I wouldn't have to chat with this bunch of losers and social misfits |
#8501 (84/200) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<cactoid> you love the Colonel
<cactoid> I like KFC chippies
<cactoid> and zinger burgers
<cactoid> the rest tastes ok while you're eating it but it's just fucking gross greasy fried vermin
<Bayls> Yeah, the chips are ace.
<Bayls> The actual chicken pieces are shit.
<Bayls> You may as well sculpt some lard into a shape the looks like a drumstick, then coat it with butter. Then roll it in lard, then melt fat onto it, then fry it in animal fat, dip it in lard then eat it.
<Bayls> I think 10 out of the 11 secrec "herbs and spices" are "lard".
<Bayls> Mmmm, making me hungry. Might go get a 21 piece bucket. :)
*** Signoff: Bayls |
#8500 (104/260) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dane> i had a nice shave just then
<Dane> it turned out really well for mew
<Dane> purposely left just enough growth so that i still appear young and "hip" but still sufficiently mature and masculine
<cactoid> in other words, gay |
#8499 (90/252) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Tippytoes> i have kids in the room
<Tippytoes> is it safe to look at?
<bark> i don't think they mention any words like CUNT on that page, no
<tm> just hide it behind your anal porn |
#8498 (-3/332) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Chris H> I'm going to marry someone with no eyes and no teeth.
<CharlEnie> haha
<Zilv3r> LmAo LoL!
<Chris H> It isn't THAT funny... do u even know why she
<Zilv3r> yeah!! so she doesn't bite you...
<CharlEnie> Does that mean u dont know why she shouldn't have eyes?
<Zilv3r> no.. wait.. i know i know!!! so she cant see you?
<CharlEnie> LoL! |
#8497 (131/299) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hakan> I hate it when the girl looks into the camera during a blow job. It totally destroys the fourth wall, which is so very important in a porno flick. |
#8496 (69/233) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[dodgelap ] fuck
[dodgelap ] work didnt put my pay into my account
[dodgelap ] wtf is goin on ?
* Synoptica thinks of 'Milton' from office space |
#8495 (139/323) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[arkZZZ ] Hi! I`m having trouble playing a couple of divx-movies.. I only get "No combination of filters could be found to render the stream". Does anyone know what to do?
[Synoptica] arkZZZ: download the fkn codec?
[arkZZZ ] fkn? where? |
#8494 (94/268) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<helminthes> omg, i was about to walk into class today but it wasn't until right before i opened the door that i realized i wasn't wearing pants, but i didn't go home i went ahead and dealt with it and lo and behold, there was a test in that class that i hadn't studied for at all. so i jumped out the window and right when i hit the ground my cell phone went off
<hakan> yipes
<rafeil> yeh
<helminthes> and that's how it all started
<helminthes> how was your day |
#8493 (-1/248) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<jamesm> is ntpd 4.0.99k23 ok?
<tm> yeah, giving remote root is now a documented feature
<sisko> laff
<jamesm> well, i know the answer now and i'm not telling you cunts |
#8492 (46/224) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<KKKBitch> im making jason take me out for dinner !!%^&*)
<KKKBitch> i have my speech ready for when he walks in the door and all.
<Bayls> KK - What's your speech?
<KKKBitch> "if you take me out for dinner, i won't give you any of my PMT shit - the end"
<KKKBitch> i used to say "if you take me out for dinner, i'll suck your dick" but he soon found that i was lying. |
#8491 (116/286) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<rafeil> i had a dream i had 3 penis's of varying legnth and direction
<rafeil> and 2 girls were sucking on them, but they were sucking on the numb ones. only one had feeling. it was like the head of the hydra myth
<helminthes> no.. not the numb ones.. oh god no.. {wakes up violently in cold sweat} |
#8490 (219/426) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<aquacavi> well what if i told you i was pregnant
<helminthes> IS IT MINE?!?!
<aquacavi> yours or the dogs
<helminthes> IT'S THE DOG'S
<helminthes> IF HE DENIES IT TELL HIM HE CAN'T TALK |
#8489 (-1/274) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<helminthes> hey i have a good pick up line
<helminthes> "if you vomit i'm not fucking holding your hair back"
<helminthes> "later" |
#8488 (129/301) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dr_rotcod> he's an ex marine and i was drunk so i said, "alright marine, kill me with one touch!"
<hakan> holy shit. wrong thing to say
<dr_rotcod> and all the sudden i was in some weird hold having my shoulder ripped apart
<dr_rotcod> and then i fell on the ground laughing/crying
<hakan> did it break??
<dr_rotcod> he looked at his hands and went, "oh my god! the demons of the american military have shone through and i am hopeless!! HOPELESS" |
#8487 (83/221) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<cactoid> pr0n is critical internet infrastructure
<cactoid> if pron wasn't flowing freely, ISPs wouldn't need to upgrade their gear and networking vendors would go out of business |
#8486 (-1/309) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hakan> mine is bent upwards but the base points down
<hakan> its like a plant trying to grow to get more sunlight
<helminthes> yeah except it's your weiner
<hakan> but theres moss on it |
#8485 (11/303) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kaff> how festy are we talking ?
<tm> makes your armpits seem like surgical theatres |
#8484 (110/220) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bobski> goconnect. the internet equivalent of the dole.
<jamesm> what is it?
<Bobski> a freebie internet service for those who blew their last 5 bucks on mcdonalds
<jamesm> how do they make money?
<Bobski> you install a wanky dialer and it spatters your screen with ads. mostly mcdonalds ads actually :)
<jamesm> in case you find another fiver |
#8483 (213/381) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tm> hmm, our call centre manager just asked how do i turn off capslock
<Zaph0d> tm: Ctrl-Alt-DEl
<tm> she's crying on her keyboard now |
#8482 (-2/230) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dr_rotcod> and you.. you'll be doing something stupid
<dr_rotcod> like skateboarding |
#8481 (2/226) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kaff> Pumpkin: The art of eating a girl out while she's on the shitter.
<Kaff> how is that a pumpkin
<mmm> gross
<Kaff> how is that normal.
<Kaff> who does that
<Kaff> I WANT NAMES
<Kaff> (and numbers) |
#8480 (1/245) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<esthar> man this guy DEFINITELY ripped me off with beer the other night
<esthar> he made me pay the same amount for a six pack that i could get a 12 pack for
<helminthes> you better watch out.. next thing you know he'll wipe out your family and steal your identity |
#8479 (77/219) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kaff> its saturday night. what are you doing here
<Kaff> i thought you'd have too much of a social life.
<spoob> Parts of me love interacting with other parts of me, but as a whole, I'm about as popular and loved as jamesm
<Kaff> oh. so you're a dead shit.
<spoob> Succinct, cruel, and accurate |
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