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#14339 (0/212) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Bug> Red, yer a nut.
Bug> A left nut.
justRed-dammit> oooo.. will you be the right nut so that i can rub against you in tight clothing? |
#14336 (117/266) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[HyperKinetic] They ate each other, they moaned. They were zombies |
#14334 (194/366) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Dainichi] I want a penis! Hell, you have a penis, you can masturbate anywhere!
[Dainichi] For a woman to do it RIGHT, she has to lay down. Man gets a boner in the kitchen, he can wack off in the kitchen.
[Dainichi] If I had a penis...I'd lock myself in my room for so long that my friends and family would probably end up calling missing persons on me. |
#14331 (85/229) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Lyme] My granpa is seriously nuts. When my parents went to visit him for his 60th anniversary thingie, he wore 1 dangly woman's earing and a gilligan hat. |
#14318 (93/232) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Bug> (That really happened to a friend of mine. Her pitbull used her friend's dildo as a rawhide bone..) |
#14316 (47/249) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
BoobiePatutti> My mom is now telling me what Hobbits do with their feet at night.
BoobiePatutti> Feeting.
BoobiePatutti> Like fisting, only with their feet. |
#14312 (139/297) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Red-Fraggle] I just noticed sumthin'... Those Star Trek uniforms can't hide a stiffy. |
#14309 (108/259) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Dainichi> I'm going to start a band called Hand Solo.
Dainichi> Our first song will be a heavy metal cover of "I Touch Myself" |
#14308 (82/238) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* EndersShadow remembers erector sets, you had to buy several before you had enough parts to have a big erection |
#14305 (193/351) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
PhantomStark> <-- laughing too hard to express it in internet acronyms |
#14304 (91/277) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
ElectromagneticPhantom> there's like this monster, stooping over a dead body, it looks up at the camera, and as it moves, the heavy skin shifts and folds over itself in places and IT LOOKS FRELLING *REAL*
Lyme> Okay, PHant, I read that sentence, and thought you were talking about dick.
ElectromagneticPhantom> yeah
Lyme> I reread it like, 3 times, and I still think you're talking about dick.
Lyme> Are you talking about dick?
ElectromagneticPhantom> but this monster has no eyes, I think. and four legs
ElectromagneticPhantom> and claws and stuf
Lyme> Four-legged dickmonster
ElectromagneticPhantom> and nasty teeth
ElectromagneticPhantom> and it eats people
CommandantCleavage> four-legged dick monster? You mean men?
Lyme> four-legged clawed cannibalistic dickmonster
ElectromagneticPhantom> it is NOT a dickmonster!
Lyme> It only eats other dick.
ElectromagneticPhantom> STOP IIIIIIIT |
#14303 (104/257) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
HyperKinetic> Crap, I got olive jizz on my shirt
Bug> ...
Lyme> o_O
HyperKinetic> It's coooold!
Bug> Why were you jerking off an olive?
HyperKinetic> LOL, no
Bug> Little Hyper has some strange tastes.
HyperKinetic> ARGH
Lyme> Olivefucker
Bug> He's after the pimento. |
#14301 (78/203) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<McMoo> i need to start making a list of crap i need to buy for my new place
<timmo> 1) food
<var-> 3 gallons vaseline, subscriptoin to hustler, 100 cases of ramen
<timmo> hah
<kisama> heh
<kisama> vaseline isn't even that great
<kisama> fuck that pussy shit
<kisama> you need astroglide
<kisama> and a set of japanese wack mittens
<kisama> let me link you
<kisama> http://www.jlist.com/cgi-bin/disp.cgi?img=http://images.jlist.com/c2/jr6992.jpg& x=573&y=500
<kisama> One of the tools used by soap girls is a rubber "magical mitten" which works with soap as lubricant for a great feel. This is a super soft rubber sheet that is held in the hand and used to clean anything you might want to clean.
<var-> haha
<timmo> you scare me snow
<kisama> just trying to ensure a soapland experience in the privacy of your own home. |
#14300 (208/386) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Phantbert> I work at a pizza place
Phantbert> and the smallest size pizza is called a 6-inch
Phantbert> so yesterday
Phantbert> I actually uttered the phrase
Phantbert> "I have a six inch sausage." |
#14299 (179/316) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Dainichi> Sometimes, I really do think it'd be nifty-keen to have another me around.
Phantbert> no way
Phantbert> I'd hate to have another me
Phantbert> the last thing I need is another pretentious asshole to deal with. |
#14297 (-3/253) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Laggur>awwh man sorry to hear that your grandpa died
<MrKank>I will never forget his last words...
<MrKank>"Mah ovaries be da bomb shizzle homie, old skool style" my grandfather said before he passed.
<Laggur>Tru dat. |
#14289 (5/215) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* eMeow-v2 fiddles with his r00t
<Apollo-> Can you fiddle with my r00t too? I like it when people play with my root
<eMeow-v2> Apollo-: you want "girlfriend". STFW.
<Apollo-> haha
<Apollo-> No, if I had a "girlfriend", "wife" would STFW for "unsolvable murder" |
#14287 (0/230) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<fireside> cum is teh nasty
<died_in_sleep> and you know this how?
<fireside> ive (accidently) and unfortuntly licked some
<died_in_sleep> you shouldt know those things, unless your dad rapes you :/
<fireside> i can cum bitch
<dragondyne> how is that possible?
<fireside> um
<fireside> it comes out... on finger... i put finger in mouth, it taste bad
<dragondyne> ...
<dragondyne> I thought you said "accidently"
<fireside> I WAS HORNY GIVE ME A DAMN BREAK :( |
#14277 (0/260) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nihil-_> she's about as darling as waking up in the morning with another mans semen all over my face |
#14265 (204/372) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
BeHeMoTh101 : i'm waiting for the right girl..... the kind that will have sex with me |
#14260 (195/337) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<GunnX> I was locked in my bathroom once getting ready for a date
<GunnX> :)
<GunnX> door knob fell off
<GunnX> those were the days
<polyglot> wtf were you doing to the doorknob? |
#14258 (274/412) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Sigurd> a sprite is anything not static
<SRElysian> a sprite is a variable object
<SRElysian> be it 2d or 3d
<TorMuck> a sprite is a fucking soda
<TorMuck> you god damn geekass bastards |
#14257 (126/332) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@ScuzleBut> I was an athiest until I realized I was God. |
#14255 (111/295) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<D_Knight> I have return
<D_Knight> And i will not be denied(....dont ban again plz) |
#14250 (59/250) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* <r0b3r> sighs and ponders what to do now....
* <Lynda> ponders, "draw something?"
<r0b3r> Tried that already. Can't think of anything to draw, really.
<Lynda> draw... a couple, resting in bed together.
* <r0b3r> blinks at what Lynda says....
<r0b3r> No. I don't draw that, thank you ery much.
<Lynda> I wasn't suggesting anything ecchi.
<Lynda> I take it you've never had a really serious relationship.
<r0b3r> I have one with someone right now, actually.
<r0b3r> Just it's an odd relationship considering my character is human
and she is an alien... |
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