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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..316317318319320321322..596Next> |
#21208 (231/380) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bob> It was a nervous twitch
<Carbeh> uh
<Carbeh> a nervous twitch that involved you jumping up, punching him in the face, and then insulting him online
<Bob> yes
<Bob> it really gets in the way of my love life |
#21194 (2/277) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Perdition] I have broadband, but it makes me look fat |
#21184 (0/236) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<flawed> matrix reloaded was pretty good
<mikebeauc> i'm goin' tomorrow
<flawed> oh here, let me tell you what happens at the end..
* Parts: mikebeauc (mikebeauc@***************.cgocable.net)
-> *mikebeauc* oh here, let me message you the ending..
*** [mikebeauc] No such user |
#21173 (97/295) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Beelzebub> Necrophilia isn't rape, it's recycling |
#21158 (179/319) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<webby> anyone else noticed an emergent trend where people deliberately say 'teh' instead of 'the'?
<webby> trust the internet to make a profoundly fucking dumb typo cool |
#21139 (4/242) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
·xplosif· sif im lesbian
·xplosif· i just got my dick sucked!
•TwisTz• by a chick?
·xplosif· no a guy |
#21109 (11/279) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Danarchy> I'm glad that with my small penis, I'll always be gentle with the ladies |
#21066 (137/365) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Canadian_Beaver>Yeah, I just finished putting a coat of polish on my hubby's boobs.
<@Canadian_Beaver>ER...boots...
<@Canadian_Beaver>Dammit...I can SO see that on bash.org
*Canadian_Beaver hides in shame |
#26295 (127/269) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<gwend> my 6 key doesnt work half the time ><
<Kiri> my CTRL key types a ` when i press it
<Kiri> lol
<gwend> lol
<Kiri> and my numpad opens internet explorer
<Kiri> or my computer
<Kiri> depends on which number lol
*** Kiri has quit IRC (Read error: 54 (Connection reset by peer))
<EvilCouch> guess she pushed the wrong number |
#26293 (10/226) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<timmo> i fucking hate
<timmo> when i answer the phone
<timmo> and it gos like this
<timmo> me: hello?
<timmo> person: hello?
<timmo> me: ... <click>
<timmo> well i hate everything besides the last line |
#26292 (93/265) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*IgnusDei learned that no matter how bad things are, it will never be quite as bad as the time he masturbated in the adult secton of the video store...which of course was under vidcam surveillance
<IgnusDei> ZING!
<m|tutorial> if i didnt like the current topic
<m|tutorial> that would be there right now
<DrFurious> it could be worse
<DrFurious> you could have masturbated in the gay adult section of the video store |
#26291 (237/401) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rodney> damn mom still on ebay
<territory> lol
<territory> ur selling ur mom? |
#26290 (177/345) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CYwolf> I always wanted to get 8 eyebrow piercings and hang a little curtain |
#26289 (359/519) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DawnG>I was forced to attend a seminar on leadership. We were broken into small groups and each was asked to state what skills a good leader possesses. I wrote, "Needs to be good with elephants and crossing Alps." The others at my table were amused, but the seminar coordinator didn't get it. I said it was a reference to Hannibal, known for his leadership qualities. Her reply: "What leadership qualities? He was a cannibal, and anyway, it was lambs, not elephants." |
#26288 (135/347) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<TuxMan> beh you know what happened...
<terminus> what?
<TuxMan> i whacked off while watching the linux kernel compile...
<TuxMan> i mean... uh...
<terminus> o_O |
#26287 (291/445) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<stormo> im watching the best movie atm..
<Aurian> why is it so good??
<stormo> any film where a clown fingerfucks a nun has got to be good
<Aurian> okay, i now consider myself lucky for not watching it
<Aurian> isn't it meant to be about ninjas???
<stormo> now they're having actual sex
<stormo> yeah
<stormo> the nun is a ninja in disguise
<Aurian> ahh
<Aurian> and who's the clown?
<stormo> another ninja
<stormo> look, i'm not watching this film for it's complex and involved plot |
#26285 (231/407) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AL9000> I'm gonna make my girlfriend a valentine with the goatse man on it, and it will have a caption that reads "I love you thiiisss much!" |
#24395 (219/363) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<poohbear0> hey what's cracken asl
<Teeks> 80/f/Near you, loverboy.
<poohbear0> i am a girl and i am 14/f/virginia
<Teeks> Oh. Well, let us start again, shall we?
<Teeks> I am 18, handsome and Nordic. |
#21182 (91/298) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Cyber J: the reason why Canada doesn't have much of a military is because they havn't made over 20 countries hate their guts like their neighbors down south... I know, I live in America :( |
#26286 (10/262) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
I like 2eat tape: when i was in 4 th grade there was this awesome 5 grader matthew podawski, i rememeber, and he used to ride his bike to school and mis match socks and and i really wanted to be his friend but he was so weird and he thanked me for the offer but was like "one friend in the world is enough" he then transfered schools |
#20994 (294/506) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Andris> See you later, masturbators.
<TheKid> After a while, pedophile. |
#20962 (-2/412) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Heavy_P> Whats the diffrence between a black and a table
<Heavy_P> A table can support a family |
#20959 (95/245) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nordling> Yes, the climax will be a Neo/Smith DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION dance off. |
#20950 (338/472) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* strang3r licks eZ_T4B's ass
* strang3r kicks eZ_T4B's ass
<strang3r> u know they really shouldnt put the "l" right beside the "k" |
#20905 (14/282) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dabz> truly.nice.ass.3.cd2.avi <- disney film about a really friendly donkey? |
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