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#38349 (37/187) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* tjm returns, having fled the office at 5.25pm with the utmost haste.
<dan> any reason?
<tjm> We have a major internal release tomorrow, and at 5.23pm I discovered that our main character had just turned into a small floating piece of sushi. |
#38348 (-1/217) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<+jeemsleep> last night i dreamed i had cancer and it turned out to be nowhere near as bad as everyone says it is |
#38330 (312/400) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Logik> LMFAO
<Logik> this is great
<Logik> listen up guys
<Logik> one of the hits on my website..
<Logik> os: windows 2000
<Logik> browser: explorer 6
<Logik> referer: www.search4hardcore.com
<Logik> hostname: Â library2.sagu.edu
<Nitron> o_0
<Logik> sagu = southwestern assembly of god university |
#38342 (246/324) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<n3ur0tich> he called me at 2 in the morning. i thought he was calling to see if i was okay. how strangly considerate, i thought. how nice.
<n3ur0tich> he called to ask if i stole his cheese. five pounds of cheese. yes, i sighed, i stole five pounds of cheese from your apartment. right. because i really needed five fucking pounds of cheese. oh, and i'm fine, thanks.
<n3ur0tich> he called again at 3.
<n3ur0tich> "are you sure you didn't take the cheese?" |
#38340 (-3/215) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<bradlos> had a blowout on the highway at 140km/h
<bradlos> no spare
<bradlos> not even my car |
#38339 (136/324) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Synlor: oh man i heard the most disgusting story ever
Synlor: okay this chick gave her boyfriend head right
Synlor: ya know
Synlor: but liek a week later there is an infection in her mouth
Synlor: so she went to the doctor to get it checked it out
butters: and?
Synlor: the doctor said it wasn't an std or anything, but it was eggs from maggots
butters: wow
Synlor: and he said the only way you could get that is if you had sex with dead people....
Synlor: her boyfriend works in a funeral homeComment: irc.cheatlist.com #dcemu
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#38336 (4/214) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<elver> Interesting. There was a huge computer referred to as '786' in today's Garfield episode.
<elver> What's odd is that it took the computer several seconds to search a database of 72000 entries.
<elver> Shouldn't take that long.
<elver> Unless the operation is I/O-bound.
<elver> The search itself should be O(n) largely.
<LordBob> elver: might be a 3.5 Khz chip
<Epoch71> binary search :D
<elver> LordBob, actually, it was a cardboard box with lights on it and a guy reading a newspaper inside who turned the lights on and off.
<elver> Still, it was unrealistic.Comment: The computer was looking for the best match, so yes, unless you do preprocessing, it ought to be O(n)...
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#38327 (-3/193) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@hobblin> would majoring in art history be something stupid to do?
<bunkahumpa> not my cup of tea, but to each his own i guess
<bunkahumpa> and i just feel 100% gay for saying that |
#38325 (126/228) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jase> hey, its cal ripkin with the osbornes! LOLOLOLOL
<El-Grande> what exactly does that acronym stand for, jase
<Maurs> that's somebody laughing out loud in a cave |
#38322 (10/196) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@ill_fill> jesus christ was a gangsta rapper
<@ill_fill> they killed him once and then he came back and make a platinum album |
#38316 (117/251) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Miyomei2: I had my portable CD player, and took it in the bathroom with me while I went to pee.
Miyomei2: And the second I whipped my penis out, the theme song to 'Rocky' started playing.
Miyomei2: I've never felt more manly than in that moment. |
#38313 (15/175) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Goatroper> theres a good chance im gonna drop in the next coupla minutes.
<Goatroper> dont know if my neighbor's wifi reaches to the bathroom :/
<Goatroper> wifi DOES reach into the bathroom
<Goatroper> :)
<Surye> taking a shit?
<OL1V3R> does that mean .. you're like .. taking a crap .. bow?
<OL1V3R> now *
<Goatroper> no
<Goatroper> i had to come in here to use the printer
<Goatroper> but i also had to pissComment: #datamachine@irc1.datamachine.net
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#38310 (271/425) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Zibro> [13:03] <Roommate> "1,100 registered sexual predators in the county.
<@Zibro> that made me think
<@Zibro> of an idea for a movie!
<@Zibro> ILLEGAL ALIEN VS SEXUAL PREDATOR |
#38306 (97/235) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< zYpurv> omg
< zYpurv> now i know what i am going to do with this property i'm gonna inherit
< zYpurv> a female-only apartment house for students
< zYpurv> of course
< Marax> with hidden cams
< zYpurv> and a 'private' pool on the roof
< Marax> and machineguns
< zYpurv> and a robot
< Marax> in case their really big boyfriends finds the cams
< zYpurv> nah i'll make the robot a sex toy and then they won't want boyfreinds anymoreComment: Ahh, geek dreams....
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#38305 (139/247) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* Worthless (~Worthless@202.88.41.191) has joined #GeekIssues
* Worthless is now known as TheLoser
<@Rjx> can you feel the self-esteem |
#38302 (36/182) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<+kirk> I DISCOVERED A STRING OF ASCII CHARACTERS THAT WILL MAKE ALL YOUR COCKS BREAK OUT IN WARTS IF YOU SEE IT
<+kirk> DO WHAT I SAY OR I PRINT IT OUT
» mode/#GNAA [+m] by Pi
» mode/#GNAA [-vo kirk kirk] by Pi
<@Pi> can't print out a damn thing now |
#38285 (5/167) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
--- gunk has changed the topic to: #mnf - simon: apparently butterscotch + baileys' is called a "cocksucking cowboy".
<freude> ...
<gunk> http://www.google.com/search?q=cocksucking+cowboy if you don't believe me.
<freude> sif i'm searching for that :p |
#38290 (111/243) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<X-G> DDustin: It's really about choosing the right language for the task.
<X-G> DDustin: If you don't need builtin string parsing, but you DO need speed, C++ is for you.
<X-G> DDustin: If you don't care so much about performance, but want to be able to mash random keys and have them be a program that ends world hunger, Perl is for youComment: #allegro
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#38280 (142/256) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Mech> wow 8th grade was so long ago
<Mech> so many memories.
* Mech represses them again. |
#38259 (86/226) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Benbread> What 'version' of linux do you intend to use?
<RyanF> The Latest |
#38251 (81/189) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jaymi> I'm feeling brave
<Jaymi> today I ate cheese from a can |
#38103 (89/197) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(Yed) the navy/army etc is scary
(Yed) if you tell them youre not interested they like
(Yed) "so when do you want to make an appointment?"
(Chexee) lmfao
(Yed) its either that
(Yed) or this big ass guy in a marine uniform
(Yed) asking you why you wont join
(Yed) over and over again
(Yed) its like interrogation
(Yed) not to mention he has a sword
(Yed) :( |
#38092 (-5/191) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Capn`Blackout> DF: some guy was going on about how AA an NA was the shit once and when I told him that it was all mental crutchwork to brace yourself up until you had the will to quit yourself he exploded on me
<Capn`Blackout> he screams MOST OF THE PEOPLE IN NA OR AA HAVE BEEN EMOTIONALLY OR PHYSICALLY ABUSED AND DO NOT HAVE THE WILLPOWER TO DO IT THEMSELVES GODDAMMITT
<Capn`Blackout> so everybody in the truck gets real quiet until I say "so who laid the weenie on YOU?" |
#38087 (51/219) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<niteshade> wtf, why is Pringles so popular in japan?
<blakat> the funky flavors, US only gets the regular, boring ones. I've never seen the Cheese and Onion ones outside of Korea though
<niteshade> regular boring?
<blakat> plain, sour cream and onion, pizza-licious, cheez-ums.. Those are the regular flavors..
<blakat> asia gets interesting stuff like: Pizza Margarita, German Bacon, Mexican Tacos, Spanish Salsa, Crispy Curry, Spicy Consomme, Cheese and Onion, Grilled Shrimp and Pepper...
<sendai> Because you can't eat just one
<gelfie> because MSG is addictive. its nicotine for food.
<blakat> and japanese love salty food
<gelfie> is that why they invented bukkake? |
#38230 (0/198) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Tenor> can i screw SS in the lung?
<Jaymi> go ahead
<zoltan> whatever you do, i call the heart
<zoltan> the pumping is quite erotic |
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