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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..190191192193194195196..596Next> |
#40928 (225/345) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<FoxMulder> Don't you HATE growing up? As a kid you'd dread being called in after school by that sultry hot blonde teacher with the emo glasses and the figure-hugging blouse for a few whacks on the ass....NOW that I'm an adult I have to PAY for such treatment :(((((Comment: zanet.org.za network
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#40955 (1/115) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Goremageddon> i use to fuck up alot when i started
<@Goremageddon> i gave a hot water enema to a 60 year old patient once
<@Goremageddon> and i didnt watch out
<@Goremageddon> so she shat all over me
<@Goremageddon> that fucking suckedComment: #blackdeath-cult
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#40953 (30/216) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Goremageddon> when i told you i dared my friend to suck the tit of a dead lady
<@Goremageddon> in the morgue
<@CHUMAHUE> yah that one was awesome
<@iTERATiON> did he?
<@Goremageddon> yes
<@iTERATiON> OMFG
<@Goremageddon> we all gave him 100 bucksComment: #blackdeath-cult
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#40952 (74/256) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Goremageddon> the funniest thing i did was when we did this cath on an obese lady
<@Goremageddon> i was gonna do an endoscopy thru a urethrea on a obese lady
<@Goremageddon> and i couldnt find her urethra
<@Goremageddon> lol
<@Goremageddon> so i kept shoving the tube in and out
<@Goremageddon> and she started to moan
<@Goremageddon> my friend just said
<@Goremageddon> "oh my god dude"
<@Goremageddon> dude i mean i was trying to do the cath rright
<@Goremageddon> so i kept putting it in and out outta her pussy
<+Fleshing> ROFL
<@iTERATiON> this is making my trip happyComment: #blackdeath-cult
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#40941 (-3/101) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Taskman> fuck u
<Taskman> oops
<Saoshyant> ......
<Saoshyant> ....
<Taskman> not u, i meen u |
#40937 (19/299) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<t|to> what qdb.us really needs is a "vote negative on all" quotes button for the queue |
#40935 (156/286) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Inuchance> rotate the computer case until the north bridge is actually north of the south bridge
<Panthar> OK, thanx.
<GnarlyBob> be sure to compensate for magnetic north vs. true north
<Inuchance> this can double the speed of your computer, as now your computer doesn't have to spend every other CPU operation flipping the bits upsidedown
<Panthar> Inuchance, ahh, I was wondering why all my binary dumps had 0 and -1 |
#40933 (90/190) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<harm_> today this one lady got pissed off cause we dont carry i quote wireless power supplies
<ogregasm> a what
<harm_> thats what i said
<harm_> maybe you want an adaptor for a wireless router o rsomething??
<harm_> shes goes no no i read online about this i wannit i wannit
<harm_> then she got pissed when i told her that kind of technology doesnt exist
<ogregasm> heh
<harm_> i tried to be nice but it got to the point where i was like"get back to us in 30 years"
<harm_> "once we attain the secret of positron deflector shields, wireless power supplies shall become a reality"
<ogregasm> why bother being that much of an ass to the poor woman
<harm_> well shes the one who got all up in my face asking for the store manager
<harm_> i told her he had just teleported to a corporate meeting in tokyo |
#40926 (95/217) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jism> Ark, remember that quote you submitted about me falling through the window naked?
<Jism> you fucker it got approved
<Ark> lol
<Ark> could of been worse, like the one where your girlfriend was going down on you as you release this dirty, smelly wet fart and she threw up all over your genitals then you kneed her in the face accidentally giving her a blood nose
<Jism> you're just lucky we're good friends and no bastard saw that
*** stealth7 (stealth@opers.sadhat.org) has joined #linux
<stealth7> lol qdb.us
*** stealth7 (stealth@opers.sadhat.org) has left #linuxComment: I take it Jism and Ark forgot about the new Log module our channel service has
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#40923 (45/219) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< lux> my toilet is dying
< lux> my poop is too much for it
<@wwmrtww> mouth to mouth!Comment: #ramen
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#40913 (96/218) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<%Lost> I want to apply for ircops =x
<@Tenor> i want to apply for a night with Lost's mom
<@coppercore> rofl
<%Lost> want her number?
<%Lost> ill give you the cell
<%Lost> we can use some extra moneyComment: #tenor on irc.gamesaloon.net
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#40909 (11/105) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jeff> now... he probably woulda been grounded forever if it were gay porn...
<pilot1> no, they're catholic |
#40905 (21/219) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Angst_> Best csi:miami moment ever, suspect's name: Wayne King.Comment: #BT efnet, maybe only the brits will understand this one ;)
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#40901 (94/222) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* sanjay has joined #hack
<sanjay> im very much in love with a girl since past 6 yrs ..it was all going fine
<riddler> oh hell no
<riddler> don't make me DoS you, boy
<sanjay> but recently i have started feeling that she is now changing .. and trying to ignore me
<sanjay> i think she has someone else now in her life .. im still very much in love with her
<sanjay> can anyone hack her email id for me .. i just wana check her emails ..
<riddler> I'm SO banning everyone when i get ops back |
#40857 (111/285) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<blister> you know whats sweet about et?
<blister> everyone plays with a ping of like, 350
<blister> and i ping 30
<blister> do the math... :D
<blister> its like a retard fight
<blister> where i run around and shoot handicapped kids
<blister> i LOVE itComment: #brained / irc.nullirc.net
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#40846 (177/289) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Mac-arena> you know, if the cleverness of spammers could be harnessed for good, the world would be perfect within a week
<RemyDWD> With larger penises for all?Comment: #adium on Freenode
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#40754 (-2/278) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<clothist> Why does teh QDB.US keep changing colors?
<Tegan> to get to the other side?
<clothist> :/ |
#40884 (199/355) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Darkest> One time I was supposed to go on a date, but she never got on Everquest, so I just sat there all alone in the field with some giant rats. I cried. |
#40807 (304/430) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Locl-Yocl> I helped the EMTs at a car wreck and got blood all over my arms and shirt. It looked like I murdered 20 people with a fork... anyway, I walked into a convieniance store down the street and said my girlfriend needs a tampon. The guy at the counter was mortified. |
#40628 (0/292) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Dcoder> brb
* Dcoder (Dcoder@x.x.x.x) Quit ("gone for good.") |
#40809 (120/276) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* Now talking in #eggdrop
<@ChanServ> I am better than all of your eggdrops.
<NSA> WTF? |
#40805 (66/220) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<L0ne_W0lf[A]> but I mean, 1% opf 100 is 10 though, right?
<Liero> ....
<Liero> no.... |
#40797 (146/258) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(4) helf: aaargh!!
(4) helf: word of advice
(4) helf: NEVER laugh while using mouth wash
(4) helf: much pain in nasal region |
#40783 (323/429) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Nudger> The Internet is great, but the best thing it's ever done is when a bored schoolfriend of mine set the school's website's background to Goatse.
* Antifreez sighs
<Antifreez> So many memories attached to that song.
<Nudger> It was so great when the IT teacher opened the page on a huge projection screen, and without looking at it, said "We, shall be attemping THIS, boys!"
<Nudger> I swear, I was almost sick from laughing.Comment: From Metafilter's IRC Channel.
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#40766 (142/298) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
janeannskinner: it's kinda sad that you're a year younger than me and we're like the same level of maturity
Devious hobo: especially since you're a girl
janeannskinner: exactly my thinking
janeannskinner: I should be all mature and thinking about stuff like global warming
janeannskinner: instead I'm giggling over the idea of the printer coming on the scanner
Devious hobo: hehehehe
janeannskinner: COMING ON TO
janeannskinner: DISREGARD PLS |
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