|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..176177178179180181182..596Next> |
#45221 (11/115) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lost> wow this is so retarted
<Lost> my main computer
<Lost> needs a new video card
<Tenor> ? Lost
<Lost> flys got inside my computer and cloged everything up
<Lost> like
<Lost> tons of them
<Tenor> how the fuck did that happen
<Lost> and burnt out my video card
<Lost> I have no screen on my window
<Lost> and I have LED lights
<Lost> so I guess they go near the LED fan
<Lost> and get sucked in |
#45219 (193/331) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Grug> Grug Fact: I was born on my mums Birthday!!!
<Grug> Serious
<Grug> 3rd of July
<Grug> She said I was worst bday present ever |
#45172 (52/244) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Phlip> I'm not insensitive! I'm political-correctness-deprived! |
#45121 (98/198) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* mrben has a friend who purposefully, when in the cinema, asks for cockporn instead of popcorn... |
#45116 (283/493) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sEcretz> One day a teacher went into her classroom and saw the word, “penis” written in small letters on the chalkboard. She erased it and went on with the day's lesson. The next day, she came in and saw the same word on the chalkbaord, but a little bit bigger. She erased it and went on with her lesson.
Each of the next several days, the teacher would come in to find “penis” on the board, a little larger each time.
<sEcretz> She went in one morning, expecting to dinf it again, but instead the chalkboard read: “The more you rub it, the bigger it gets.” |
#45065 (179/341) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<fimion> i think canada's country code should be .ehComment: amen. (#C&T)
|
#45028 (84/216) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@semi> opera used to be a lot faster, but the new versions really dont feel the same
<@semi> and i've gotten too used to stuff like adblock to switch to a browser that not only doesnt have it, but also has its own ads
<@semi> not just that, but those targeted ads owned me
<@semi> i clicked some link in #gnaa then the ads were trying to hook me up with tranny dating services and sell me discretely packaged high heels. |
#45024 (59/217) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
•›› Topic: [[klined]] changes topic to [FLEA at MIT June 19 | I love teh mirc | trojans and viruses and spyware, oh my | weak passwords lead to cookie dough icecream]
[@nmx] cookie dough ice cream?!
• @nmx changes his password to nmx |
#45023 (138/310) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
s T a R lI n E j: Sauron is a giant flaming eyeball... can he see why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch? |
#45022 (4/108) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Faggertot> I was being a man-ho at the library ;o!
<Fagatron> Those poor books. ;[
<Fagatron> What'd you do?
<Fagatron> Find a sex ed book and stroke the word
<Fagatron> "Vagina"? |
#44998 (203/263) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Josho> can't believe i fit so much shit in the dishwasher
<@Josho> tetris skills paying off |
#44992 (211/359) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Bart join #gta
<Bart> hello
<Bart> i'm back is anyone there
<Kotsudaira> Sorry the members of this chat room are currently unavailable, please try again later.
<Kotsudaira> This is an automated response.
<Bart> ok
Bart quit (Quit: Bart)Comment: #gta @ irc.gtanet.com
|
#44984 (480/680) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
auslander: i think we can all agree I'm the smartest one here
megaL: your IQ is like 1. im a million time smarter
s1r: a million times 1 is still one, asshole |
#44980 (94/172) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Humour> milkshakes arent that good imo
<Humour> at least not ones made by mcdonalds
<omnigeek> hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
<omnigeek> How could you gauge anything by mcdonalds standards
<omnigeek> Thats like having a fat guy rape you in prison and saying you dont enjoy sex. |
#44970 (84/236) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<3WD> >.<
<3WD> i have all this work to do
<3WD> but I'm so close to being done this quest in GuildWars...
<1of42> >.<
<3WD> i hate procrastionation...
<3WD> meh, i'll stop procrastinating later |
#44955 (48/150) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
gr3ym4tt3r: NEVER MASTURBATE AFTER 5 DAYS OF NOT DOING IT.
AerialFlames: Dude, yeah
gr3ym4tt3r: Especially with no towels nearby.
AerialFlames: It goes BOOM
gr3ym4tt3r: This is gonna be fucking nasty, but I hit myself in the fucking EYE.
gr3ym4tt3r: IN. MY. EYE.
AerialFlames: ..WTF
AerialFlames: WTF
AerialFlames: POINT IT AWAY
AerialFlames: DUMBASS
gr3ym4tt3r: I did... but it was like... *twi*BLAMF*tch* |
#44967 (20/120) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<SmallKiwi>: my lil stepson has been vomiting at school for the last 2.5 hours
<SmallKiwi>: and i was out getting groceries
<SmallKiwi>: and the only number they called was HOME PHONE
<SmallKiwi>: WTF
<SmallKiwi>: I HAVE CELL PHONE
<SmallKiwi>: THEY HAVE MY CELL #
<SmallKiwi>: They have like 3 emergency contact #'s, anyone of which could've contacted me
<SmallKiwi>: but no
<SmallKiwi>: they call my HOME PHONE ONLY
<SmallKiwi>: FUCKING INCOMPETENT JERKS
<Guyp>: :|
<Guyp>: it's time to prove to your step kids that youre worth a damn
<Guyp>: sometimes that means dying
<Guyp>: sometimes that means killing a whole lot of teachersComment: Sin City <3
|
#44953 (81/159) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<beafet> gender neutral name
<Buliwif> kelly
<Buliwif> gene
<WeirdHat> randy
<Buliwif> Randy: ok for a guy... porn star future for a chick
<WeirdHat> my mom's name is randy
<Buliwif> ...... |
#44924 (47/241) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<CAPS-LOCK> ARRGH
<CAPS-LOCK> As I unplugged a 4.3Gb SCSI HD, three of the power connector pins broke
<CAPS-LOCK> Equipped with only a 45-watt glass iron with a flat tip and a 3/4 used spool of silver-bearing solder I set out to reattach them
<CAPS-LOCK> After 45 minutes of burning my fingers trying to avoid knocking the damn things over with my gigantic iron, I finally managed to get them all fixed
<CAPS-LOCK> I gleefully went upstairs and attempted to reinstall the HD in its new home.
<CAPS-LOCK> but as I plugged in the power connector...
<CAPS-LOCK> ALL FOUR PINS BROKE!!!!
<CAPS-LOCK> My belly is so full of hate right now...
<overridex> CAPS-LOCK: hmm.... that's kind of like killing a weed in your lawn with a bazooka while leaving everything else in tact ;)Comment: Woops, trimmed too much off that last one.
|
#44951 (12/84) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
evilicey: This is going to fucking rock
evilicey: 2 (possably 3) gige's for incoming
evilicey: 4 for outgoing
evilicey: thats 7TB/sec! buwahaha
linky: holly shit you'll get laid for sure now! |
#44948 (10/82) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@MrNoLimit> damn movies on slow ass bots
<@MrNoLimit> i wonder if i say something would they ban me
<+TimJohnson> depends on how you say it
<+TimJohnson> excuse me are there any faster bots that have X movie?
<+TimJohnson> is probably safe
<+TimJohnson> hey you dirty fuckstains your bots are slower than jesus carrying a fucking crucifix
<+TimJohnson> probably will result in a ban
<@naste> haha
<@MrNoLimit> lmfao
<@MrNoLimit> i should do that one
Quits: MrNoLimit (blah@ForGeT.vH0sTs.GeT.Vh0Es.NeT)(Quit: SvSKilled: ....Eat shit and die.) |
#44942 (73/209) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<[sync]> Windows Services for Unix destroyed my windows installation
<[sync]> Microsoft: this is what you get, traitor |
#44938 (78/172) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<devolve> if I went to jail, I have no idea what would happen to all my shit
<MotorToad> it would be firmly packed |
#44934 (267/411) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* eLe sends hordes of lemmings over HolyGoat.
<HolyGoat> lemmings are cool :)
<HolyGoat> my g/f has lemmings
<eLe> Haha.
<HolyGoat> seriously :)
<rioter> does she make them all blow up?
<rioter> cause thats what i used to do
<HolyGoat> heh no, not the computer game
<rioter> computer game? |
#44930 (11/137) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<beavis-> i can get an ascii character in windows by doing alt-some numbers
<beavis-> is there an osx equivalent?
<Sam-I-Am> dunno
<beavis-> you're a shitty computer geek, you know that? |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..176177178179180181182..596Next> |
|