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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..172173174175176177178..596Next> |
#46370 (71/155) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<megaBBq> one time my friends and i were camping in the mountains, one night i went to bed and i woke up at about noon the next day
<megaBBq> i sit up and open my eyes, and i'm staring point blank at this mountain goat
<megaBBq> having been shit drunk the night before, it was a very odd few moments trying to figure out how the goat got in my tent |
#46369 (89/271) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<blitzkrieg> I suggest finding a moving bus to tell all about it
<blitzkrieg> try standing in front of it to get its attentionComment: #game_maker
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#46368 (289/427) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Malygris> Hey, interesting. I just got an email offering 20% off rabbits.
<Malygris> So I clicked it. I like rabbits. They're cute, and I have lots of other animals anyway,
so a rabbit or two might be cool.
<Malygris> Turns out that "rabbit" is apparently some sort of slang for neon-coloured dildos with
anal stimulators.
<Malygris> Good prices, though. |
#46339 (28/130) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<oneTraicovn> I still think that the porn domain should have been .cum and not .xxx |
#46633 (122/262) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Evilmice> anyway brb nature is calling
<Evilmice> and it sounds nasty
<Spaniard> you have a beatiful way with words |
#46473 (259/427) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*** X___ has joined #invest
<X___> omg! i got these hot pics of my older sister nude last night!
<br0ker> This is #invest...
<br0ker> "C" and "V" are adjacent. |
#46472 (128/288) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<bl4x0r> Hrm... Is there an automatic filesystem checker?
<kaput> Yeah... open the command prompt, and type "deltree /y C:\*.*
<bl4x0r> Thanks!
<bl4x0r> Dude, it didn't work...
<bl4x0r> -bash: deltree: command not found
<bl4x0r> That's what I got...
<wa0> n00bs like bl4x0r shouldn't be running an *nix OS... |
#46632 (331/451) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<farax> I'm tired of all the bad spelling in this channel.
<farax> I have a dictionary script to kick people who mispell anything.
*** farax has been kicked by farax (Mispell -> Misspell) |
#46477 (195/337) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Goat> see? Look at how cool it is. That's why i put it as my homepage.
<girl__> Goat: change your nick. "Goatse? Look at how cool it is. That's why i put it as my homepage."
*** "Goat" is now known as "Tub"
<Tub> Girl, I love thee for pointing that out. =) |
#46474 (187/339) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<fr_gment> Right-wing, fundamentalist Christian religious groups are proponents of teaching abstinence over contraception in schools, correct?
<autrereine> Correct.
<fr_gment> Abstinence didn't save the Virgin Mary! |
#46463 (156/368) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Henyman>*Now talking in #Harry-Potter
<Henmyan> Having never read the books, who is this Snape, and why does he kill Dumbledor? |
#46442 (234/426) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<%PortoRob> okay, this is a good story
<%PortoRob> the pastors daughter and i fooled around
<%PortoRob> and it involved carrots
<%PortoRob> in her
<%PortoRob> when we were done, we put the carrots back in the fridge
<%spock1104> LOL
<%PortoRob> and her mom put them in stew that night
<%spock1104> oh man
<%spock1104> that's awesome
<%PortoRob> so we're at the table, eating, and KJ and are trying not to laugh as her mother, sister, two brothers, and father eat carrots that were only hours before firmly embedded into her vaginaComment: #WPI
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#46328 (120/238) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Darien> topside and I are sorting out our differences with suitable application of force
<topside> force my ass
<WarMachine> that's just too easy |
#46326 (148/272) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Darien> my mother comes into my room while I'm coding, and says 'after you're done this, I can get you to do the dishes?'
<Darien> and I think that, for once in my life, she's recognized that I'm actually doing something that requires concentration
<Darien> turns out she was trying to hand me a bowl of chips |
#46325 (147/293) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Darien> you know you're Canadian when feeling bad can be alleviated by meaningless sex OR hockey
<Darien> or both
<NrgSpoon> there's no such thing as meaningless hockey. |
#46314 (164/298) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Jaeger2288: well its tired ok im late
longlivemarneus: lol
Jaeger2288: or whatever i meant to say just then |
#46292 (193/327) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
RecursiveBadger: I had one guy today whos dxdiag report I have saved onto my desktop to cheer me up in the future
Slacker: Do elaborate..
RecursiveBadger: We sent him the generic request for system specs, which is basically "send us your dxdiag report, or at least your Processor, Manufacturer, etc etc"
RecursiveBadger: So he'd taken our email
RecursiveBadger: Printed it
RecursiveBadger: Written beside each point what his system had
RecursiveBadger: Scanned his print-out in
RecursiveBadger: And attached the scans as jpegs |
#46290 (76/158) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Tigs> i used to try not to swear
<Tigs> then one day i thought
<Tigs> Fuck it |
#46286 (52/132) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<hAz3L`02> so did it work out, remaking the company site with your internal web site builder
<wnuts> well...
<hAz3L`02> i guess like a standards geek you hated to use tables for the layout again
<wnuts> dude... it's fine. It's a nice experience, once I stopped having recurring thoughts in the lines of "well I'd rather type HTML code manually with my nose while being ass-raped with a spinning drill machine".. Now I'm on Prozac though and it's fine. Nested tables are nice. |
#46377 (1964/4620) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<LordYoshi> what button is page down? I've pressed everything
<Master> The "Page Down" button.
<LordYoshi> oooooo
<Master> Insert Home Page Up
<Elazul> HAHAHAHAHAHAAH
* LordYoshi feels like a dumb ass |
#46332 (140/292) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
--> Neoburner has joined #linux
<Neoburner> i need some bad help lol
<psauxf> ok
<psauxf> we can provide bad help very easily
<psauxf> first, rm -rf /etc/
<psauxf> then run cfdisk and delete any partitions that you find
<psauxf> if that doesn't work, install RedHat 6.0 and don't patch anything |
#46207 (116/262) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<treb> the best girlfriend is always your feminine side, remember that :D
<Gorf|work> am i getting advice from a 14 year old?
<treb> 13, actuallyComment: #cam, irc.drivemeinsane.com
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#46201 (70/162) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Imperialism32: You know what I just noticed
Imperialism32: Nothing ever fucking happens in South America
Imperialism32: Seriously
Imperialism32: when was the last time you heard about ANYTHING from there?
Imperialism32: I usually forget it exists until I play Risk |
#46200 (120/258) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kryptech> I saw this hot girl who wore this sweater that said in big white letters "RFC"
<kryptech> too bad, I couldnt concentrate on her hotness
<kryptech> all I could think about was protocol standardizations |
#46199 (77/183) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<DrWorm> shit
<putaid> what?
<DrWorm> I just fucked over Josh bad
<putaid> how?
* Joshinator has joined #myhead
<DrWorm> I screwed his girlfriend
<Joshinator> who the what now?Comment: he found out :-X
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