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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..155156157158159160161..596Next> |
#51450 (189/347) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
plainsongx: also, that is a lie. the bumping and grinding was like the one good part of that movie [The Matrix II].
HeKuknos: dude no it was not
HeKuknos: i watched that movie with my dad
HeKuknos: it was the most uncomfotable fifteen minutes that wouldn't end of my LIFE |
#51512 (222/430) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<matja> well, i _tried_ to read the case study on why windows is more stable than linux, but IE crashed while opening the pdfComment: As stable as einsteinium maybe.
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#51460 (154/340) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
••• Join: Drehiel
(Anonymous) who is this?
(+Drehiel) Who am I? Who are you? Who is anyone? Who are we?
(Anonymous) wat
(+Drehiel) olololo
(Anonymous) Are you a real person?
(+Drehiel) Am I real? Are you real? Is anyone real? Are we real?
(Anonymous) Or is this some crap Microsoft made up.
(+Drehiel) Am I crap? Are you crap? Is anyone crap? Are we crap?
(Anonymous) yo
(Anonymous) cfdfd
(+Drehiel) Am I yo? Are you yo? Is anyone yo? Are we yo?
••• Quit: Anonymous (Anonymous@dm-18266.vnnyca.adelphia.net) (Exit: Quit)
(+Drehiel) I WINComment: #screwthischat : irc.darkmyst.org
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#51456 (37/265) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< BernardBlack> i just thought of something
< BernardBlack> do midget bakers bake shortbread?Comment: #otw on freenode
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#51445 (123/283) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<piv-4> im starting an irc literacy project
<piv-4> just hit the keys if you are interestedComment: Undernet #macintosh.
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#51440 (149/309) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<marena> ill ring the clubs and shit within a few weeks
<dux0r> i'd suggest you shit beforehand, u may explode |
#51438 (284/450) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@bailz> Cum.In.My.Ass.Not.In.My.Mouth.3.DVDRiP.SVCD-IJS
<@bailz> hawt
<Hobbes|1Day> thats fucking disgusting
<Hobbes|1Day> who the fuck uses svcd anymore?? |
#51430 (337/495) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
CannonSpiker0023: So there I was the last man on my paintball team
MPike: wow, you do paintball?
CannonSpiker0023: Taking head from these guys who were hiding behind some boxes across the street
MPike: cool
MPike: wait
MPike: what?
CannonSpiker0023: HEAT
CannonSpiker0023: I MEANT HEAT
MPike: Is "paintball team" some kind of code?
CannonSpiker0023: STFU
MPike: For "gay sex group"?
CannonSpiker0023: GAWD IT WAS A TYPO
SRYelznik: Or was it?
CannonSpiker0023: GAH |
#51410 (143/297) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* BuRn sets mode: +v g
* DamDevil sets mode: +v g
<+g> oh oh oh..can i trade my two +v's for a larger prize? :o |
#51406 (211/377) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* [WarMachine] has joined #cesspool
<Gormandu> Where the hell have you been?
<[WarMachine]> banned from the pc
<Gormandu> why?
<[WarMachine]> I showed my parents Goatse when I was drunk
<Gormandu> So they banned you for a week?
<[WarMachine]> No the school year, they went out and took the power cord, but I bought one earlier
<Gormandu> You are so sad. |
#51396 (249/395) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< OpenFire> I don't know, I would start raging down the hallway asking whoever did it to own up.
< OpenFire> Just for satisfaction
< lenox> i'd urinate in someone's cubical
< lenox> then when they complain about it
< lenox> be like "i know, right? and just the other day someone dented my powerbook"
< lenox> IF they did it, they'll back down and that'll be that. you got them back
< lenox> IF they did NOT do it, now you have an ally
< lenox> they want to get this powerbook-denting public-urinating dude just as much as you
< lenox> pretty much, i am saying, you have to pee in someone's cubicle todayComment: #macintosh on irc.arstechnica.com
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#51392 (210/378) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<f0rked> it has that awful droning NEH NEH NEH alarm clock sound.. and sometimes I don't wake up, I just dream about trying to shut it off. My latest dream today was: I was in a school with a bunch of people, and everyone could hear this loud alarm and we were all crowded in the hallway running around trying to figure out how to shut it off. Eventually I figured out I was emitting it and executed a regular expression with my watch like s/#alarm#// to shut it ...
<f0rked> ... off. Once I knew it was me, I turned it back on, gathered up a bunch of people, then got ahead of them and showed them as I turned it off. My point was to tell people to learn regular expressions.
<f0rked> it was fucked up. |
#51387 (121/345) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Frosty: Maria mentioned that when I was eating her out.
Frosty: I was in there and she was like, "A clit is an unformed penis."
Frosty: I nearly vomited in her vagina. |
#51383 (455/603) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<[Fek]Dragon> go ahead try 2 hack my box i been using linux for 4 years
<[Fek]Dragon> i can hack u with the linux tools right back tho and u can do nuthing
<[PRIEST]> I'm scared, truly.
<[Fek]Dragon> just so u know i have gained access to ur box and am lookin at ur stuff
<[Fek]Dragon> u have alot of stolen music
<[PRIEST]> How did you gain access to my system?
<[Fek]Dragon> i told u i use linux to hack u windows faggets
....
[[Fek]Dragon VERSION reply]: mIRC v6.16 Khaled Mardam-Bey
<[PRIEST]> So I see here from this homework folder your name is Kevin Kowalzyk
<[Fek]Dragon> fuk u im goin to call the fbi
* [Fek]Dragon has quit IRC (Quit:)Comment: One of the other channel lurkers caught his name earlier.
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#51373 (283/423) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
NES: you should do what I did and try to convince your boss to migrate their whole massive application from vb6 to .net
NES: tell them it'll be very easy
NES: and then leave the company |
#51343 (238/400) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<wils0r> I was hearing about that guy
<wils0r> Jude Law or whatever
<wils0r> he has the best life ever
<loko> cuz hes fuckin the nanny or why
<wils0r> he fucked the nanny, and then his hot ass wife took him back, made him make up a list of all the girls he fucked
<wils0r> and now he is in trouble because he inadvertantly left kate moss off the list, who he had a 3some with
<wils0r> so wtf
<wils0r> does life get better than being able to forget about a 3some with kate moss |
#51339 (140/304) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(MrMystery) are you an annoying whiner in real life too?
(NouberNou) yea
(NouberNou) i try to be as real on the internet as i am in real life, since the internet is real life
(NouberNou) you would probably sock me in the face if you ever met me :P
(MrMystery) I don't do that
(NouberNou) i dont know, you would probably end up making an exception for me
(NouberNou) GOD DAMN IT MY DAD HAS BEEN ON THE CAN FOR LIKE 40 MINUTES NOW
(MrMystery) ...maybe you're right |
#51314 (34/272) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Patr1ck> wait, why do you have a web cam?
<Patr1ck> there is no broadband here
<DarkSenay> i was supposed to talk with my GF at home
<DarkSenay> yeah, found out there was no broadband
<DarkSenay> and we broke up |
#51335 (298/500) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<GenericLoser> A kid got detention today in French class.
<GenericLoser> He made a white flag for his project on French art. |
#51320 (135/313) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Thatch> If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction. |
#51310 (277/447) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Aeturnus> i want a tattoo of jesus that has a tattoo of me on his arm |
#51285 (501/767) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Retro> THE MIRACLE OF CELL DIVISION
<Retro> o
<Retro> 0
<Retro> 8
<Retro> oo |
#51274 (175/397) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<patours> my ftp is yours :)
<Pnuts> oooooh
<Pnuts> I like when you talk dirty
<patours> lol
<JU5TICE> Nothing like hammering an ftp until the early morning. "Take my big files, you dirty virus ridden server"
<JU5TICE> Apparently
<Jose`> who's your admin
<Jose`> yeah
<Jose`> thats right
<Jose`> who's your admin! |
#51267 (597/697) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<duncan> now I must hurry... driving lessons are afoot!
<Fibbles> wait
<Fibbles> you can't drive yet?
<Fibbles> but you were driving us everywhere at the lan...
<duncan> >:)
<Fibbles> i feel somewhat more greatful to be alive |
#51129 (203/375) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
([LH]Neil|Work) the worst thing about audio programming: the possibility of deafening yourself
([LH]Neil|Work) just got a 440Hz tone at pretty much full volume from my headphones
([LH]Neil|Work) my ears are ringing now
(Silex) you got an A for that
(Silex) ;) |
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