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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..134135136137138139140..596Next> |
#56732 (58/274) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Throgan> Oh, speaking of Monty Python, I think Terry Gilliam is doing some thing on PBS about the number 1.
<cookiemonster> Leave it to Monty Python to make an entire show about piss. |
#56727 (87/305) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Whitetail> I wonder if the pope masturbates
<Haelo> WhiteTail: It's not called masturbation.
<Haelo> Whitetail: It's called 'self-blessing' |
#56647 (58/284) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<tonyyarusso> I turned off my backlight by mimicking the line I found in the suspend script, I think it was 'sudo vbetool dpms off'. So then, to turn it back on, I tried to reverse it by hitting the up arrow, backspace three times, then on (effectively 'sudo vbetool dpms on'), then my password. Now the screen is cycling through colors and I can't do anything. Please help! |
#56827 (360/514) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(+[dps]rannmann) i wonder what this command does
(+[dps]rannmann) maybe it'll blow up my mirc
(+[dps]rannmann) playing: "The Infamous Double Dildo Janine!! (xxx dildo fist fuck sex porn ficken anal divx).mpg" .:1384kbps|Stereo|8:26:.
(+[dps]rannmann) FUCK
(+[dps]rannmann) NO
(+[dps]rannmann) THAT'S WHAT IT DOES
(+[dps]rannmann) ignore that!Comment: Owned?
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#56788 (228/486) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sonorous> ______
<sonorous> < HALP >
<sonorous> ------
<sonorous> \
<sonorous> \
<sonorous> ^__^ /
<sonorous> (oo)\_______/ _________
<sonorous> (__)\ )=( ____|_ \_____
<sonorous> ||----w | \ \ \_____ |
<sonorous> || || || || |
#56782 (487/593) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
boudi24: what do u use to protect ur computer from all kinds of viruses and adwares and spywares and pop ups...
boudi24: ?
metsoc30: common sense mostly
boudi24: what's that ?
boudi24: is it a program ? |
#56737 (255/399) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
dansSUCHaniceguy: Dude, you ever do something and you just know it's wrong?
dansSUCHaniceguy: The whole time you're telling yourself, This is WRONG
dansSUCHaniceguy: Just going through with it, doubt and guilt eating away at you but you do it anyway
gravybythepint: dammit did you fuck kyle's girlfriend
dansSUCHaniceguy: Get your mind out of the gutter
dansSUCHaniceguy: I drank the last of the orange juice |
#56705 (170/346) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<^KiwiKid^> OMG, I heard a beeping and thought it was my bus.
<^KiwiKid^> I couldn't be bothered coming here and typing bye and I yelled bye to my laptop... |
#56696 (219/383) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Xerxes is now listening to Nightwish - Once
* Sanguini listened to Nightwish. Once. |
#56663 (114/294) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@cristipengraffe> Exchange we just had:
<@cristipengraffe> Cristi: "I am at the mercy of my cookie whims"
<@cristipengraffe> Jeph: "Well, I am at the mercy of my occasional booze whims"
<@cristipengraffe> Cristi: "Well, my whims do not effect my liver function"
<@cristipengraffe> Jeph: "Well, MY whims don't effect the size of my butt"
<@cristipengraffe> Cristi and Jeph: "Touche"Comment: #qc
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#56747 (275/415) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< din> so after i get back from the boxing matches saturday
< din> stayed at my gf's place
< din> apparently i was sleepwalking
< din> last i remember is that my gf woke me up at 4am
< din> and says "You just pissed in my floor."
< din> i'm all WTF
< din> NO FSCKIN WAY
< din> i pissed just to the right of her desk, in my sleep
< din> and flushed the printer
< din> and came back to bedComment: sleepflushing
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#56678 (281/435) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Quietus is now known as BruceLee
<BruceLee> Now someone change to JackieChan so we can have a karate match.
<KamiKaziGames> ...k
* KamiKaziGames is now known as JackieChan
* JackieChan has quit IRC (Killed (NickServ (GHOST command used by BruceLee)))
<BruceLee> K/O |
#56806 (320/456) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<comwalk> Remember, here in the U.S.A, we have reached a new age.
<comwalk> NOBODY is responsible for their own actions.
<comwalk> Remember that.
<comwalk> Holy shit! I killed somebody! Bob made me do it!
<comwalk> Bob: Joe made me do it!
<comwalk> Joe: I blame the media!
<comwalk> Media: Videogames.
<comwalk> Videogames: Personal responsibility?
<comwalk> Personal Responsibility: <AFK> |
#56644 (388/496) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
hehehe8383: school was pretty fun for me cus of the teachers =P
hehehe8383: like i remember this one time in like 5th grade or something
hehehe8383: i got a bloody nose in my math class and i had on a white shirt to boot
hehehe8383: so i went to the nurse for like 10 min. while i was sittin in the nurses office, the period was over so my class left and another class came in
hehehe8383: but i still had my books there so i had to go back in
hehehe8383: so i walk into the classroom with blood stains on my shirt and holding a blood spotted tissue up to my nose
hehehe8383: so the teacher pointed at me and she goes "see what i do to kids who dont do their homework?"
hehehe8383: i swear to you, this kid next to me had a MORTIFIED look on his face as he started scribbling stuff down on some incomplete worksheet =P |
#56642 (562/652) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
@[BONFIRE] just got the best question ever
@[BONFIRE] by some n00b
@[BONFIRE] whos trying to install an old printer
@[BONFIRE] like 15 yo
@[BONFIRE] he doesnt know why it wont work
@[BONFIRE] it keep poping up with "new hardware found"
@[BONFIRE] and he clicks cancel
@[BONFIRE] cause its not new
@[BONFIRE] >_< |
#56632 (166/324) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@irokie> why with the weeping? are you a woman in the throes of birth?
< Plastic> ;_;
< Inky> Apparently so!
<@brazil> ;_;o <-- I can see th head
<@irokie> ...he's giving birth out his ear?Comment: #netsoc
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#56621 (147/321) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<robert> No one is talking in here anyways
<SVRCompHobbyist> so it's OK to flood, so long as no one else was talking?
<SVRCompHobbyist> that's bullshit
<SVRCompHobbyist> flooding is bad whether or not someone was talking
<robert> why?
<Kalypso> it puts thousands and thousands of people out of their homes =[Comment: #wpi
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#56616 (220/368) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<GenericLoser> I have a great commercial idea for Visa.
<GenericLoser> Have a really attractive girl stuff Visa cards down her shirt and pants.
<GenericLoser> "Visa: It's everywhere you want to be." |
#56605 (158/348) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sphex> I hate trees so much. just.. standing there.. like JERKS. |
#56603 (390/528) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<evilAdmin> I feel like a dolt
<evilAdmin> sitting in a meeting with da b0ss
<evilAdmin> I screwed up a IT expendature report... Put down Win 2003 Enterprise when we needed standard just from downloadin' it off BT as a habbit. It stuck another $3000 on the report by accident.
<evilAdmin> B0ss asked me about it. My first reaction, I kid you not, was this little hand-twitch thing that would have otherwise been CTRL-Z.
<evilAdmin> The b0ss caught it. He said "Did you just press Undo?", and I said "Yeah, now I need to enter the infinite money cheat". He just stared at me.
<evilAdmin> Then him and his 4 goons all started laughing at me :(. My job sux |
#56577 (149/317) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Stupid_0> Never compromise your principles, except to get laid or if there's a chance of a pay rise. |
#56564 (275/423) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Lambie> i wish people wouldnt leave before i can ban them
<@Lambie> it's fucking rude |
#56520 (134/400) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<emilying> i said no.
<whooka> Jesus, what crawled up your vagina and died?
<devin_11> ...
<themike> ...
<themike> dude, she just had a miscarriage. not funny.Comment: #methlab on freenode
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#56641 (248/404) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
mjl69> 98.5% of dna is considered to be junk dna with no known purpose. maybe it's xml tags. |
#56571 (44/244) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<AlexFili> i am a n00b, what do u expect?
[...]
<Bjarni> AlexFili: you need to learn stuff to reach the n00b level |
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