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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..114115116117118119120..596Next> |
#70403 (223/459) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<morphie> tovarich!
<kroesjnov> vodka!
<morphie> da!
<kroesjnov> ah, the russian three way handshake :) |
#70206 (107/397) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Luuseens> i drank some espresso today.. the conversation went something like this -
<Luuseens> seller.echo ("Would you want me to add some water to your espresso?":
<Luuseens> me.echo ("No, ");
<Luuseens> //me.echo ("you dont add water to my espresso, ignorant bitch, cause then it becomes plain coffe.");
<Luuseens> me.echo ("thank you. :) "); |
#70187 (205/437) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Genocidal> belts are for losers
<Genocidal> :D
<Buck> and for kids who don't listen to their parents |
#69953 (335/479) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<jon> shit... im sittin here tryin to get info about Tool for my class presentatin, and 40 mins later here i am reading about woody allen, history of fonts, and the temptations of jesus of nazareth
<jon> stupid wikipedia, be less organized! |
#70154 (110/344) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Ibram> Jesus christ
<Ibram> $490 dollars for a japanese font for microsoft word?
<Ingell> sucker.ttf |
#69922 (7/279) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<lizsac> just foolin around
<lizsac> it's friday night for me
<lizsac> yeah come party down in #perl
<lizsac> you know right
* lizsac looks around
<Sartak> I liked it a little better when it was dead quiet. >_>
<lizsac> that's bad for your monitor
<lizsac> the text will burn into it and you'll see it when you turn the monitor off
<Sartak> It's 1994 all over again |
#69917 (178/402) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<RuneCaster> I also hate people that walk up behind you and say something that sounds like the trigger to a conversation directed at you
<RuneCaster> Then you turn around and they're talking to a product from the store
<RuneCaster> "Well look who it is!" (I turn around) "Wha?"
<RuneCaster> and numbnuts is talking to Steven Seagal on the front of a dvd cover. |
#69910 (18/368) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@Sid> see
<@Sid> it's possible that she wasn't killed on the third
<@Sid> and she met up with hans reiser a coupla days later
<@HrdwrBoB> true
<@Sid> and he killed her to death in the passenger seat of his honda
<@HrdwrBoB> or transported the body
<@HrdwrBoB> unlikely death in car
<@HrdwrBoB> it would have been messy
<@Sid> then laid the bits of corpse out in the woods in a nice b-tree, for O(log(n)) retrieval laterComment: irc.ragingfist.net
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#69899 (418/612) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<willy> when i say POS it means parents over shoulder. which means no cussing. got it?
***
<willy> ugh, POS.
<foonisha> WOOO PORN FUCK DAMN SHIT TITTIES BOOBS GOD DAMN FUCK FUCK FUCK SHIT
*willy has signed off |
#69719 (422/660) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<BlackCat22> North Korea wise men discover Nuclear Fission.
<BlackCat22> What would you like to research next?
<BlackCat22> >Miniturization (85 turns)
<BlackCat22> >Refrigeration (67 turns)
<BlackCat22> >The Radio (45 turns)
<BlackCat22> >Crop Rotation (8 turns)
<BlackCat22> >Literacy (1 turn) |
#69717 (150/372) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Djinna> i think i'm gonna make fleshy put out tonight.
<miscca> hahahah
<miscca> make him put out?
<miscca> you have not been married long enough for that missy :)
<Djinna> i'm gonna tie him to the bed and sit on his face until he makes me smileComment: #bifemunix on EFnet
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#69556 (436/570) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Cin> Why do grandparents have no sense of time?
<Teshi> It goes so slowly for them.
<TheFoundation> it's a well known fact that as you grow older, your velocity approaches the speed of light
<TheFoundation> that's why old people always appear to move slowly, and shrink in size |
#69532 (259/449) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<clifgriffin> Women idolize a level of beauty only achievable through Photoshop. |
#69904 (185/347) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<randi> did you kill this perl coder?
<sbahra> randi, I've gotten into many arguments with him. :-)
<sbahra> He's far too much of a celebrity in this scene to really "win". He did write *a lot* of code. :-)
<sbahra> Not necessarily good code, but a lot of code.
<randi> you know, sucking a lot of dick doesn't make you a porn star. it just makes you a slut. |
#69682 (183/367) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<nobd> i was just playing hide and go seek with my fish
<nobd> he won
<rolib> You? Outsmarted by a fish? I couldn't imagine. |
#69646 (746/920) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Jaswinder> I was listening to the radio on the way home
<Jaswinder> And I found this Christian music station, but
<Linka> Yes?
<Linka> =O
<Jaswinder> Some rap station was bleeding into it
<Linka> Gasp.
<Jaswinder> At the most awesome moments
<Linka> That's weird. XDDDDD
<keen> rofl
<Jaswinder> So it was like
<Jaswinder> THANK YOU THANK YOU LORD
<Jaswinder> FOR THE BITCHES |
#69640 (268/440) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
[helf] my trip was stupid. it was my fault :P the problem that is. i had forgotten and left automatic updates enabled.. so it would download updates, restart itself and our hard drive protection hardware/software would kick in on reboot and revert any changes made.. so it just sat there all morning looping
[helf] i got there and all the public machines were rebooting
[helf] the nontechnical lady was all 'they wont stopp!!!!!!" |
#69572 (375/567) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Apollo> FUCK!
<Apollo> god damnit, I just copied an entire directory by accident. christ, I hate linux >:(
<Apollo> *sigh* brb, reformatting AGAIN
<Trinexx> wait, why are you reformatting? O_o
<Apollo> oh, i havent figured out how to delete files in linux yet, so I just reformat the harddrive when I need to delete something
<Trinexx> you serious? XD
<Apollo> bbiab.
<Trinexx> just use "rm <filename>" you fucking idiot
** Signoff: Apollo (Quit: Reformatting, AGAIN)
<Trinexx> ... or not :/ |
#69534 (343/487) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@Orochi> Give a man a fish he will eat for a day....
<@Orochi> However, if you teach a man to fish he will bore the hell out of you on the outdoor living channel |
#69477 (187/421) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Omi> So yeah, this idiot was trying to insult me
<Omi> By calling me gay
<Omi> Then she said, and I quote,
* Omi looks up Logs
<Omi> "thts rite u cnt reli sspeak wiv ur cock stuck in ur mouth or up another guys arse"
<Omi> So... not only did she compliment me by saying my cock is so big I can fit it in my own mouth...
<Omi> But she made absolutely no sense what so ever with the second part...
<Omi> How exactly would having a cock on someones ass prevent you from talking? |
#69440 (163/395) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Anony-X>I use Photoshop for morally questionable purposes. |
#69240 (373/535) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
thepr0fessor: Can anyone define simply the "Big Bang Theory?
kidxskate5: BOOM |
#68951 (167/431) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@semi> man
<@semi> i think i should turn my speakers down
<@zeppeh> or quit listening to nsync
<@semi> i cant tell if its gas from downing that soda or just the bass.
<@zeppeh> nsync doesn't have bass
<@semi> it has lance bass
<@semi> i mean
<@semi> fuck you.Comment: #brained irc.catheadlabs.com. also, I wasn't listening to nsync.
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#68761 (199/365) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Rayder> If you are interested in being part of a the Knowledge Bowl Team, please come to a short meeting at 2:15 on Wednesday, September 27th. What is Knowledge Bowl you might ask? Well, it is rather like Jeopardy except more fun and only for high school students. Come and find out whether it's for you.
<Rayder> but where is the meeting?
<Dr_Pressure> looks like knowlege bowl is not for you |
#68591 (182/346) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
MotaStorm: So my buddy came out of the bathroom at Taco Bell
WC`: Oh shit
WC`: He survived?
MotaStorm: And just to freak out the girl behind the counter, he asks her, "Why is the guy on the picture on the bathroom door wearing a dress?" |
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