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#70743 (364/546) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Flaim> headlines:
<Flaim> > New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group |
#70492 (181/435) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<vh> So I wonder if when you're really good at something and you die and go to heaven, if there is some dude who was doing it 2000 years ago, who's been doing it heaven the whole time, who's like.. 2000 years better at it then you
<vh> and like.. you try to catch up, but it's like.. he's always 2000 years better
<vh> so you get really depressed and try to kill yourself, but you're already dead
<vh> reincarnation solves a lot of these problemsComment: #perl
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#70943 (60/388) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<landen> dioid the spark of knowledge gleams in every student. the duty of the teacher is to water it.Comment: #math on efnet
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#70887 (273/493) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@Majin_Raiha> like the time my dads friend challenged a brit to drag race
<@Majin_Raiha> he came in his car and the other dude came in a dress |
#70483 (278/468) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
(ChocoCid) Obviously I was either onto something, or on something.
(ChocoCid) -- Larry Wall on the creation of Perl
(BotlGnomz) And all these years later
(BotlGnomz) we still can't decide.Comment: #o-gaming on EFNet
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#70479 (380/612) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<%spock1104> what am i, a girl?
* spock1104 looks down
<%spock1104> i don't see a vagina
<+Toba|BSD> your boobs are in the wayComment: #wpi
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#70466 (672/834) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Pig[Trabajo]> I was visiting my friend's uni, right?
<Pig[Trabajo]> And they had this Thai kid show up
<Pig[Trabajo]> His full name was: Sataporn Pornpromlikit
<Pig[Trabajo]> Every single fraternity petitioned him to join them.
<Pig[Trabajo]> Everyone wanted Sataporn Pornpromlikit on their side.
<Pig[Trabajo]> The poor little guy was so confused. |
#70696 (668/818) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<triavox> dont. type. anything. teacher. looking. over. shoulder. freaking. me. out.
<triavox> ya lady i mean you
<triavox> no i wont do you the decency of turning around
<triavox> .. brb |
#70470 (240/460) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<+Kiro> I totally pulled the Jedi mind trick on someone.
<+Kiro> Like, we get commissions for tours and stuff.
<+Kiro> 15 bucks per tour if its from 1 of our 2 companies, nothing if its from this 3rd party.
<+Kiro> So this guy insists on getting 8 tours from this 3rd company.
<+Kiro> So I just looked at him and was like.
<+Kiro> "You don't want this tour company"
<+Kiro> ANd he was all.
<+Kiro> "I dont want this tour company" |
#70701 (152/398) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<rm-rf> !8 die of starvation or eat lunch
<Willow> rm-rf: die of starvation
<rm-rf> damn |
#70545 (354/546) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Clipsy> There's a review on slashdot of a book called "Creating Web Pages with Ajax," and I was thinking
<Clipsy> I'd like to make a book called "Creating Web2.0 Content for Dummies"
<Clipsy> and then when someone opens the book
<Clipsy> a boxing glove on a spring comes out and punches them in the face |
#70385 (453/623) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
oompaloompaboy89: i got into a fight wit a 5 year old
Kuro Desir: o_O
Kuro Desir: OVER WHAT!?
oompaloompaboy89: who is better batman or superman
oompaloompaboy89: i was wearing a batman shirt and this kid wad wearing a superman shirt
oompaloompaboy89: and he points at mine and says "superman is better"
oompaloompaboy89: so i said fuck off and of course since hes 5 he dousnt know what fuck off means
oompaloompaboy89: so we start argueing and it ends with both of us making faces at each other |
#69593 (449/589) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@SyRuS> err
<@SyRuS> question guys
<@SyRuS> really important question
<@Cold0ne> yes, you are gay
<@SyRuS> how to i change the "author" of a word document
<@SyRuS> i need to change it from "fuck microsoft"
<@SyRuS> when i select file in explorer it says fuck microsoft in status bar
<@Cold0ne> lollll
<@SyRuS> i applied for like 5 jobs allready
<@SyRuS> no chance ;x
<@Cold0ne> AAAAAHAHAHHA
<@Cold0ne> SELF PWNED
<Funky_> hahaha SyRuS
<@SyRuS> ;l |
#70284 (524/674) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<MSCaptain> man Im feeling stupid
<MSCaptain> what are the five senses again?
<MSCaptain> touch, taste, sound sight and what
<JDigital> spidey
<MSCaptain> yes thanks JD |
#70670 (394/586) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<red_ryan> so... I played starcraft online against some koreans today
<red_ryan> i was doing good until about 15 minutes in, then a fucking TON zerglings came out of nowhere and pwned the fuck out of me
...
<red_ryan> btw, what does "kekekekekeke" mean? |
#70508 (235/457) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Pickett> Oh man, you have to hear this joke.
<Justin> Yeah? Shoot.
<Pickett> So I was playing Dungeons and Dragons...
<Justin> ...
<Justin> Dude, the punchline is supposed to be at the end of the joke. |
#70207 (867/963) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<LycoLoco> My son has a gameboy advance, and he blows on the cartidges when they don't work. The funny thing, is that this was not taught to him. He just did it on instinct, which leads me to believe that this behavior is inherited not learned. It seems that I've blown into so many nintendo cartridges, that it has changed my DNA... |
#70439 (246/448) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Panda-> i love irc so much more than my family
<Panda-> mainly because my grandmother doesnt recognize me
<Panda-> BUT AUTHSERV DOES! |
#70665 (294/500) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<+ba> I'm saying that five-fourths of Americans can't do fractionsComment: #WPI
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#70659 (355/545) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<rockdots> lol, that was one nice freudian strip
<rockdots> * strip
<rockdots> * slip
<rockdots> ahahaha
<rockdots> oh, the irony |
#70455 (737/879) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
[krazy]: i was lost in school today
[krazy]: i couldnt find my class
[krazy]: and guess what the room # was
[dizzy]: ?
[krazy]: 404 |
#70213 (295/499) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<JamesF1> I was sat in a lecture today at Uni, and I saw drawn on the desk:
<JamesF1> "I graduate in 6 weeks, and I'm still immature enough to draw on desks"
<cmad> rofl!Comment: The joys of Cardiff University...
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#70718 (202/402) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<ZoFreX> I'm actually considering fucking some fat chick I know
<ZoFreX> just cos she's up for it
<TheRandom> ZoFreX if you do
<TheRandom> i wont talk to you again
<ZoFreX> awesome.
<Ecom> hell for that, even I would do her
<FireFalcon> I'd fuck a fat chick if TR would commit suicide.
<FireFalcon> Hell, I'd fuck Zo if TR kills himself.
<ZoFreX> special 2 for 1 deal, I'd kill myself too |
#70658 (227/523) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<caesar> ahhh... i downloaded this beautiful pr0n vid, masturbated while watching it and then had a wonderful orgasm :)
<rockdots> heh, caesar: you conquered, you saw, you came?
<caesar> roflmao |
#70442 (428/568) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Chaos_Incarnate> i want to get a government grant
<Chaos_Incarnate> to do a scientific experiment
<DJPugsly> on what
<Chaos_Incarnate> to see exactly what speed an esclator has to be at to make a slinky achieve perpetual motion
<Chaos_Incarnate> i need a box of slinkies
<Chaos_Incarnate> and an escalator |
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