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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..110111112113114115116..596Next> |
#76837 (355/505) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<GnrlMc> The closest you ever got to asking her out was using the characters of her name as iterators in your programming projects... |
#77069 (277/503) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Parable> Just because I fucked a girl twice doesn't mean I'm hetero! ;_;
<Jetta> Parable, thats twice more than a few in here |
#76863 (2638/2978) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Painezor> So I had to hand in this essay the other day
<Painezor> the topic was "The effect of the internet on society"
<Painezor> so I just handed in "I was going to do the essay, then I discovered the internet had porn" on a sheet of A4.
<Painezor> Long story short I don't have to do any more essays. |
#76611 (52/424) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Craig> you wanna go drink?
<Genga> ive no cash
<Genga> im more broke than a...
<Genga> Windows based PC
<Genga> oh god I cant believe I just said that |
#76609 (260/502) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<John8520> I play mexican checkers
<zashi> John8520, you hide coke in the pieces and smuggle them onto the other side of the board? |
#76605 (617/833) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@big_al> .
<Loki1> good point |
#76601 (438/676) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
< lerxst> on that note
< lerxst> it is official
< lerxst> amanda and i are expecting
< tyger> oh?!
< lerxst> that's what /i/ said
< tyger> holy shit!.....is congrats appropriate in this case?
< lerxst> hell yeah!
< lerxst> my penis works!
< tyger> alright then!
< lerxst> now. down to business.
< lerxst> i need leads on hamster balls that come in progressively escalating sizes. |
#75339 (26/402) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
* Gangstar (~Gangstar@538ee73.1366fc9a.ma.comcast.net) has joined #wpi
<@UnityDivide> well, more accurately, "Grievous hunted Jedi for sport and kept his victims' lightsabers as trophies of his conquests within his cloak."
<+Toba> hi Gangstar
<+Toba> fyi we aren't always giant star wars nerds
<Gangstar> i amComment: #wpi
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#76331 (246/498) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Truespin: So ya'll know how i work with an advertising firm right? Well today i was put on company probation... if i so much as steal a paperclip, im fired and charges are being pressed against me.
Truespin: We had a meeting today, with ideas for a "reverse racism" campaign for the local highschool. They asked for us to all brainstorm, and i had this brilliant stroke of genius.
Truespin: I held up a note pad with the following poster idea:
Reverse Racism, promote equality
reggin edaps cips oobaggij gongin yeknom-hcrop
knihc iloom ekyk sgorf rethgif-thgin
Truespin: I thought it was brilliant... apparently the senior executive didnt. He actually walked over, slapped me, and told me to get the fuck out of the office before he kicked my ass (he was black btw)
Truespin: So needless to say, im not going to think outside the box any time soon... |
#76047 (311/619) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@flamingspinach> what in the actual fuck
<@flamingspinach> is going on behind me
<@flamingspinach> on my roommate's bed
<@flamingspinach> he seems to be whispering randomly and moving around
<@flamingspinach> and one of his feet is significantly smaller than the other
<@flamingspinach> lol looks like I haven't been paying much attention to the world outside IRCComment: #machogang on popn.cjb.net:4400
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#75078 (179/439) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<shen> I wanted to listen to my iPod, but, I left the headphones in the car
<shen> so I turned it on and put the headphone jack close to my ear to see if I could hear anything
<shen> it didn't work |
#74903 (252/614) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<caddis> the hardest thing about buying a macbook is telling your parents you are gayComment: server: irc.ruxcon.org.au, #ozphreak
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#74565 (371/557) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<duncanspock> hey NegaLos, i saw your pic, you look like a pedo
<NegaLos> i saw yours, you look like my potential victim |
#74314 (220/430) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<lundman> could you pull a disk out, and tell us disk size and maker?
<IDC_hirai> The maker is fujitsu.
<IDC_hirai> size is
<IDC_hirai> 16cm x 11cmComment: 3am on-call
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#76126 (202/436) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<nuculeron> ugh
<nuculeron> my moron friend got this new system in his car
<nuculeron> with this huge ass woofer
<nuculeron> and his plate popped off from the rattling
<nuculeron> right in front of a cop |
#76066 (658/852) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Smokey> Me and this bitch are playing phone tag
<Smokey> Her mom answered
<Smokey> and she was like "Your going to have to call back, adam, Ive got to use the phone"
<Smokey> Then she didnt hang up, and started dialing numbers
<Smokey> Then stopped
<Smokey> and I was like, in a deeper voice "Hello"
<Smokey> And she was like "Hey, baby"
<Smokey> Then I just started laughing
<Smokey> And she was like Goddamnit |
#73453 (255/439) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<KefkaIIV> I had a dream that you could put Javascript in C++, and I made a code that had a bunch of pop-ups.
<blank> You became a Mozilla developer in your sleep. |
#73450 (1052/1140) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Buck> the MPAA site has an interesting anti piracy blitz going on for Christmas
<Buck> they say that they're protecting users from buying pirated copies of films
<Buck> then they go on to say that you can recognize pirated films by the fact that they're a lot cheaper, out before or while films are still in theatres, are region free and contain no DRM
<Buck> if I wouldn't have pirated before.. the MPAA sure has convinced me to do it now |
#76119 (211/429) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Eldritch> my friend
<Eldritch> calls tech support for his ISP
<Eldritch> 'cuase hes getting packet loss
<Eldritch> they tell him his hard drive is probably full
<Eldritch> and that he should delete some things
<Eldritch> so he says to the guy
<Eldritch> he has a 60 gig hard drive and only 30 is used
<Eldritch> the rep says
<Eldritch> "thats alot"
<Eldritch> and that half is about the point where things start to mess upComment: Adelphia internet
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#75815 (96/432) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Scolcite: How do I fuck a fat girl that lives 45min away without actually dating her?
Scolcite: She keeps talking about how she LOVES to suck cock, so she's got me, there is nothing I can do. I just don't want to be stuck with her
Drimmie: fat girls dont want love, they want burgers. fuck her then throw her a big mac. while she's chompin, escape out the back door |
#75584 (352/532) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
xTedHeadx: My family must be like the worst Jews in history.
xTedHeadx: We celebrated Hanukkah by going out for lobster. |
#73363 (321/501) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
* Wordsmith fights with a video
<Wordsmith> ... having a Codec moment |
#73312 (161/401) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
+Kvn: cause mcafee is the gayest one out there
@Stirk: It is, it really is
@Stirk: I'd rather use iTunes as my antivirus |
#75576 (188/436) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@ALGORYTHM> make your own wikipedia entry then you too can be right |
#75067 (113/347) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Dizzy: I went to McDonalds and got this.. Ranch BLT chicken thing...
Dizzy: Now I've got a McTummy Ache...
Dizzy: I think that should be #2 on the menu
Dizzy: cuz thats all you're doing for the hour after you eat it |
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