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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..60616263646566..596Next> |
#310135* (?/20) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<mudlord> sys reqs are ogl 1.1 with the vsync extension'
<squeakyneb> fuck idk if my GPU supports that
<squeakyneb> /s
<mudlord> oh dear
<mudlord> fuck
<mudlord> DDDD:
<mudlord> should have done the whole thing in GDIComment: #auscene
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#310155* (?/20) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[+RC] Grimm is..
[+mez] Grimm is a trash show.
[+RC] It's..
[+RC] ..It's like a zit I had on my ass.
[+RC] The buildup was painful.. and not worth the time.. but there was a split second of ecstasy that almost made it worthwhile. |
#310159* (?/38) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<`WarpKat> so i have this 4 core AMD box that i'm using as my VM test environment. and it has 8gb. i want to boost it to 16. so i make a purchase request that needs my boss' approval. she comes back with, "what box are you using and why are you requesting Corsair Vengeance?"
<`WarpKat> so i go, "the box I'm using is a 4-core AMD box we had our Quality Manager build under harsh working conditions. i requested Corsair Vengeance because it's basically performance non-ECC gaming RAM and if i put ECC RAM onto this board, it'll turn into Dikembe Mutombo and go, “NO NO NO” during the POST."
<`WarpKat> "plus, the gnarly-looking heatsink makes a nice comb for people with bald spots and side hair." |
#310176* (?/26) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<elliott> So it's not exactly trivial.
[Later about same thing]
<elliott> It's a trivial C program :P |
#310190* (?/22) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[after a long string of Lymia getting lambdabot to spit out huge, meaningless type signatures]
<Lymia> I need to learn more Haskell...
<CakeProphet> ..I need to get op privs. |
#310351* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
< Trixar_za> I will admit that I spend more time in keep track of my condom expiration dates than my average internet security.
< Trixar_za> (Which is way more than I care to admit with the former) |
#310378* (?/18) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@Old_Man_Sheriff> I want some pizza
* jrvc throws a frozen pizza at Old_Man_Sheriff
* Old_Man_Sheriff grabs it
<@Old_Man_Sheriff> It's not delivery!
<@Old_Man_Sheriff> It's not DiGiorno either
<@Old_Man_Sheriff> This is literally heroin.
<+Tourres> wat
<@Old_Man_Sheriff> jrvc is a dope fiend |
#310498* (?/16) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<tsunderehime> *kicks black chocobo square in the nuts making sure to pop the left one with the pressure* guess who also isnt have kids.
<The Leader> >guess who also isn't have kids
<2460124601> if it's good enough for madonna and co.. I'm sure we can get away with it
<black chocobo> Wait this means I don't have to wear a condom anymore
<black chocobo> WHOO
<Animosity> <black chocobo> Wait this means I don't have to wear a condom anymore < i honestly do hope you never breed. |
#310522* (?/20) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<prison_> im ready for a week in the psych ward just to be away from my family
<prison_> im gonna go nuts over xmas break |
#310565* (?/4) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
The present is the equilibrium of the past and the future. (Le présent, c'est l'équilibre - Du passé et du futur) - [Charles de LEUSSE, French writer] |
#310591* (?/4) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@torchlight> I have 200 digits of pi in my head!
<+Squiggy> I'm not even going to ask 'Really?'
<@torchlight> (and I can type it out within thirty seconds)
<+RDF> ...
<&Xythar> i have a sequence of eleven special letters of the alphabet in my head that i can type out in under 5 seconds
<&Xythar> symphogearg
<+Squiggy> qwertzuiopü
<Dozo|sleep> hunter2
<@torchlight> what's so special about being able to type asterisks fast |
#310802* (?/8) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
AlexSenpaiGamer: im a kawaii senpai
Da_maul: I doubt your kawaii-ness
Da_maul: do you have a kawaii permit?
AlexSenpaiGamer: yea
Da_maul: show it to me, the kawaii police
Sakuyak ?: uwah!
Sakuyak ?: im a good girl!
Sakuyak ?: dont bully me
AlexSenpaiGamer: *hides behind saku*
Da_maul: no you aren't
Sakuyak ?: im going to have to clean up the bullies
AlexSenpaiGamer: maul is scary!
Da_maul: you are but a regular quality girl
Sakuyak ?: rude
Agent Matthias: Alex. Show us the permit, or we will be forced to remove your title of senpai. And nobody will ever notice you.
AlexSenpaiGamer: ;-;
Agent Matthias: Sakuyak, hand over the senpai.
AlexSenpaiGamer: eep.
Efreak: omg there's a senpai in here...plznoticeme
Da_maul: We're revoking their senpai status as we speak
AlexSenpaiGamer: NUUU
Agent Matthias: You have one more chance, Alex. Either that, or even Saku won't notice you.
AlexSenpaiGamer: *hands permit* JEEZ
AlexSenpaiGamer: I DIDNT WANNA SHOW IT
Agent Matthias: Many thanks. *Passes to maul*
Da_maul: *waves* thank you for your co-operation
Da_maul: *fist bumps matthias*
Lg |?: happy ending
AlexSenpaiGamer: *cries*
Agent Matthias: No prob.
Lg |?: eugh O.O why is he crying
Da_maul: Alex, just make sure to have proper kawaii documentation in the future
Da_maul: you can get the paperwork at your local government Uguu officeComment: Anime1.0@Steam
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#310808* (?/4) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
kekit: only thing that sucks when it rains...
kekit is now Online. |
#310850 (-4/44) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Mr-Ben> Man, forgot about theguy finding God. A full week now.
<Samwise> He hasn't found him after a week?
<Mr-Ben> Evidentally not. Probably still looking.
<zompist> one whole week of god. better crack a window...
<Samwise> Man, you can't just look in churches, either.
<Mr-Ben> Some people look at the bottoms of whiskey bottles.
<jacquilyn> You can't find God in the bottom of a whiskey bottle, by the time you get to the bottom, he's already been poured out into the glass... |
#310921* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<birdman> all you need is love!
<shady> and helium for making your voice awesomely squeaky
<shady> great, now that song is stuck in my head
<shady> thank you man
<shady> i think i actually need to go listen to rick astley to get rid of that phantom song |
#310935* (?/14) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* Thefreshmibofbel-air (cgiirc@Rizon-519356E3.sta.dodo.net.au) has joined
<codename_erin> and digital music is also the largest share of profits in the music industry
<Thefreshmibofbel-air> Now this is a storyall about how
<codename_erin> no
<codename_erin> =^.^=
* Thefreshmibofbel-air has quit () |
#310937* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<ancestral> So if Jenkins is the white collar, prim and proper dutiful upper class servant…
<ancestral> Travis is…
<ancestral> Blue collar trailer park trash?
<ancestral> Or maybe Travis is the hip young urban professional |
#310948* (?/12) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Helios747> I think a Mosquito literally bit my butt last night
<Helios747> I am very confused on how |
#310972* (?/12) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<furyhunter> the drivers range from "buggy as hell" to "absolutely broken"
<XgF> Only if you buy Qualcomm :P
<NanoSector> but it works!
* NanoSector waits for the headshot
* Neui gives NanoSector a pistol
* NanoSector shoots Neui
<NanoSector> woops
* Neui dies
* NanoSector whistles and walks away |
#310988* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
09:49 < Leafer91> @random leafer91
09:49 < rip> Error: The command "random" is available in the Dict, Quote, and QuoteGrabs plugins. Please specify the plugin whose
command you wish to call by using its name as a command before "random".
09:49 < Leafer91> @randomquote leafer91
09:49 < rip> <Leafer91> how do i fuck up so badly everyday |
#311035* (?/14) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Kawa> Interactive sexual encounters are already in planning.
<CaptainJistuce> KA->EN: Kawa got a date!Comment: Trying to talk about a game I'm making when...
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#311045* (?/22) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<tev> Note to self: When going from Dvorak to QWERTY, be careful not to typo “I finished eating†as “I finished dating†|
#311071* (?/18) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[17:28:24] <+LexPro> in order to pass time for some reason I decided to do Maths homework
[17:28:29] <+LexPro> what's wrong with me |
#311171* (?/12) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<RGize_re_reborn> I don´t trust pregnant women...because i feel like they are hiding something from me |
#311202* (?/14) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Mike1: I just got asked why we aren't doing snapchat for our android developer show.
Mike2: ugh I flatly said no to a school group project using Whatsapp to communicate instead of Gmail/Hangouts
Mike2: why? because it's stupid to do that!
Mike2: really requires explanation ?
Mike1: There's two classes of ppl with these things now.
Mike1: Our devs are not doing face swaps, they are coding face swaps
Mike1: What was the argument for what's app
Mike2: Are ppl out of their minds?
Mike2: It's just what they use for fun therefore they use it for work too uh, no
Mike1: Did I tell you we have 4 messaging apps in the office, because people refuse to move from there's to the one that was mandated Skype
Mike2: well skype does suck
Mike2: but so does fragmentation
Mike1: And the managers are the worst offenders. One is on hangouts, one is on slack and one is on aim
Mike2: hahaha
Mike2: aim
Mike2: ouch
Mike2: fire him/her first
Mike2: using aim/aol is like calling dibbs on a pack of pampers |
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