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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..193194195196197198199..596Next> |
#303075* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<_Digital> it's been 21 days
<_Digital> and I need to reboot my server
<_Digital> well I don't need to, but I want to test a new kernel...
<i_c-Y> haha
<i_c-Y> the gentard's dilemma! |
#303077* (?/15) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ElSantos> if #paforums_pax transcripts were made into a book, the title would be From God to Bras in Five Minutes |
#303090* (?/13) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<bishnu> gizmodo managed to liveblog this thing somehow, hah
<lumy> bishnu: I assume they sent some else in.
<bishnu> yeah
<LoneGamer> i wonder when security guards wearing black turtlenecks and armed with iBatons will start combing the seats, looking for gizmodo people
<doviende> bahahaha
<hochoboi> see that
<hochoboi> that I would pay to be present for
<doviende> nothing like a well designed telescoping iBaton
<doviende> except with no USB port
<LoneGamer> the iBaton is a 4g bluetooth wifi device
<LoneGamer> it charges using an internal spring mechanism
<LoneGamer> and they can be bought in 16, 32, and 64gb configurations
<lumy> I must say. Apple does make good hardware.
* Boose applauds lightly |
#303104* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<WellDigger5> Huh. So far I've submitted - and had rejected - 99 quotes to bash, qdb, etc.
<randolph> Oh?
<WellDigger5> Yah. Thing is, most of them were actually decent. Stuff that'd be at least moderately amusing to pretty much any casual reader not inside the joke, and not a total dweeb or geek.
<randolph> That may actually be the problem.
<WellDigger5> Kinda what I figured, too. Do me a favor and post this:
<WellDigger5> Fuck fuck fuckity fuck, bash bash fuck fuck bash bash bash fuck fuck norwald's ass bash fuck fuck bash your mother bash McDonalds bash NOT FUNNY AT ALL. Bash. Fuck.
<leeb> oooo-kay.... |
#303137* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Ice_cube> ARRRRGH!!! I had a horribal nightmare of a bilion suicidal, magma covered lepers and a helsih butcher rending the flesh of each other on a blood covered aftarlife of copper :< |
#303147* (?/35) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Moon_DogNet> <tom> did you hear about the magic tractor?
<Moon_DogNet> <tom> it went down the hill and turned into a field!!!
<Moon_DogNet> <ReAc> :/
<Moon_DogNet> <dave> did you hear about the magic tom?
<Moon_DogNet> <dave> he went down the hill and I stabbed him in the face
<shepherd> Moon_DogNet: : Did you hear a about Moon_Doggy?
<Moon_DogNet> hmm
<shepherd> Moon_DogNet: He started pasting stupid quotes and I a hooded man poured acid all over his face |
#303158* (?/37) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<%Studly_McManslut> Silver, I have a secret for you
<+Doodle> Silver
<%Studly_McManslut> When you make out
<+Doodle> You just gotta go in
<+Doodle> grab her cock
<%Studly_McManslut> Keep a live crab in your mouth
<+Doodle> and do stuff to it
<+Doodle> ◔ ◡ ◔
<%Studly_McManslut> It makes it so intense and romantic.
<&Silverhawk79> You guys give horrible advice.
<&Silverhawk79> ;_;Comment: Never ask IRC for relationship advice.
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#303173* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< psypete> oh shit
<%lindsay> that kid is such a head case
< psypete> i have a great joke to tell
< HackitScratchit> k
< psypete> debating on telling it, because kickban might make me productive
< psypete> probably not, but who knows
< HackitScratchit> this is IRC
< HackitScratchit> say w/e youw ant
<+Zed> The best part of the invisible mouse video is themusic
<+Zed> the music*
< psypete> HackitScratchit: i fucked your mom last night?
< psypete> she said take out the trash
< HackitScratchit> you would have had to dig her up first you bastard
< psypete> who says i didn't?
< HackitScratchit> that's really fucked up but it made me laugh
< HackitScratchit> so i want come and kill you now
< psypete> ok, so SHE didn't say it, but i moved her mouth and threw my voice
< redcell> thats were all his dates come from
< HackitScratchit> k that's taking it too far, I've decided to kill you again
< psypete> what can i say
< psypete> i like 'em dry.
< oxagast> underground?
< oxagast> embalmed
< oxagast> huffing embalming fluid while fucking
< oxagast> mmmmmmmmm
< psypete> dude gross
< psypete> i don't do drugs |
#303174* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<BOMBO> if only the kin worked well with a mac, you could OWN starbucks with the amount of douchness you'd oozeComment: #droideris on irc.andirc.net
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#303179* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
GIVE ME BACK THAT FILET-O-FISH
GIVE ME THAT FISH
GIVE ME BACK THAT FILET-O-FISH
GIVE ME THAT FISH
WHAT IF IT WERE YOU HANGING UP ON THIS WALL?
IF IT WERE YOU IN THIS SANDWICH,
YOU WOULDN'T BE LAUGHING AT ALLLLL |
#303204* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Now talking on #pharyngula
<the_leif> I remind you, I rather do adore engaging in intercourse, however I am preferential to recieving oral stimulation.
<pastafarian> really?
<pastafarian> that is indeed surprising
<RokiB> the_leif, man or woman
<pastafarian> a man, obviously
<the_leif> Word.
<RokiB> why would you prefer oral to sweet sweet vag
<the_leif> Well, in the event that either instance occurs, an african male must achieve ejaculation
<pastafarian> and an asian one?
<the_leif> I don't think Three Six Mafia afforded for that.Comment: Verbose rap lyrics in a science chat.
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#303205* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[21:05:56] <resuni> if i ever start my own irc server, i'm gonna use either unreal or that other one you hate
[21:06:51] <mike> well, youre a faggot that couldnt even listen long enough yesterday telling about you would hate debian stable before you went and installed it and complained like a little whiney OMG I CANT GOOGLE BITCH
[21:06:59] <mike> NOW WHAT
[21:07:03] <resuni> D:
[21:07:06] * resuni cries in a corner
[21:07:17] <mike> "OMGIEZ MY FIREFOX IS SO OLLLD"
[21:07:32] <mike> fucking crybaby pussy that doesnt listen.
[21:07:50] <mike> afk, new show on.
[21:07:54] <resuni> ok cya. enjoy your show.Comment: irc.sindustries.org #troll
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#303206* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Moon_Doggy> @urban yiff
* GameOver licks Moon_Doggy
<Little_Death> Moon_Doggy: yiff (1/15+): 1) (noun) Sound supposedly made by mating arctic foxes. 2) (acronym) (or more backronym) YIFF or Y. I. F. F. - "Young Incredibly Fuckable Furry" 3) (proper name) YIFF sound server. Program for Linux to help handle audio. 4) (noun) More or less (usually more) sexual act. Commonly used by furries, usu... 1) I heard foxes making the "yiff" noises. 2) He's a Y.I.F.F. 3) I've upgraded the yiff server. 4)
<Little_Death> ...
* GameOver licks Little_Death
<GameOver> =^_^=
<Moon_Doggy> Bwaah, what did you highlight on that
<noms> furry
<noms> obv
<Bwaah> So I don't miss hawt yiffage
<Annabear> bye Bwaah
<Moon_Doggy> lol |
#303215* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Cyber> also I had a good conversation with a sufferer of MS and I ended up helping him get through some protesters
<Cyber> so there was that too
<Lenaro> i mean, windows sucks, but it's not THAT bad |
#303240* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* ihalip got his card 3 hours ago :D
<h4xordood> ihalip: congrats
<h4xordood> :)
<ihalip> [link to photo on facebook removed]
<ihalip> <3
<carols> ihalip: maybe not something you want to be posting with your full card number
<ojwb> ihalip: can you photo the CVV code on the other side for us too?
<ihalip> :|
* ihalip didn't think it all the way throughComment: Google branded pre-pay card arrives for a Summer of Code student
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#303257* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* ProblyHuman chugs the flat, disgusting, month-old Pepsi as fast as his little ferret stomach will take it. Said stomach then proceeds to explode. |
#303267* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Crowley> it's a europe thing
<Pryoidain> >europe thing
<Pryoidain> so is the black plauge
<Crowley> we pay for calls outside our own carrier, we pay for SMS messages outside our own carrier...
<Crowley> black plague = immigration?
<Pryoidain> no, the disease that killed millions of people in the middle ages
<Crowley> yeah, immigration? |
#303279* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<cotton> http://www.qdb.us/80430 LOL
<Godwin> Because I plucked an ingrown pube with a pair of pliers?
<Yeloazn> lol got caught with animal porn
<vrex> what
<Yeloazn> read cotton's last linkComment: #pcsx2 on Efnet
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#303292* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@redubious> newman's own makes pet food now
<@redubious> only saw it as a bread brand before
<p_g_p> they make wine too
<p_g_p> you can construct a whole jesus from paul newman products
<@cortex> Newman's Own is basically Jesus Voltron
<p_g_p> Feeling extravagant? Try adding Newman-O's cookies for eyes! |
#303302* (?/35) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Crayboff> I HAS CANNED AIR
<Crayboff> RAWR
<Crayboff> I DARE YOU TO CHALLENGE ME
* Dritz has kicked Crayboff ('kay) |
#303351* (?/19) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Nafe> no speed jusrt clear mind, i got thoughts comming out my buttocks |
#303361* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> no, shut up and have a beer
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> we'll get there when we get there!!
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> we'll be there in 2 fucking hours
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> !!
* cQuaid throws noobiesnack out of the car
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
* noobiesnack jumps back into the car.
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
* cQuaid jumps out of the car.
* noobiesnack drags cQuaid back into the car.
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
* cQuaid grumbles and drives
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> NO
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
* cQuaid stops the car, pulls noobiesnack out and shootes him in the head with a shotgun
* noobiesnack is immune to shotgun.
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
* cQuaid ,infuriated, slams noobiesnack's head into the pavement until it bleeds
* noobiesnack is immune to pavement.
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> damn
* cQuaid drives on
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> ... you must be *really* bored
< noobiesnack> hehe. im waiting for you to say something other than no.
< noobiesnack> are we there yet?
<!cQuaid> yes, we are there
< noobiesnack> good
< noobiesnack> where are we?
< noobiesnack> who are you?
< noobiesnack> what is this place?
< noobiesnack> this place is scary
< noobiesnack> what is that?
<!cQuaid> this is hell
< noobiesnack> thats a cookie
<!cQuaid> I am you're reaper
< noobiesnack> i want a cookie
< noobiesnack> go get me a cookie.
<!cQuaid> there are no cookies in hell
< noobiesnack> go get me a cookie.
* cQuaid throws noobiesnack out of hell for some peace and quite
< noobiesnack> lol. at least I know I wont rot in hell. I will annoy it so bad they will throw me out.
<!cQuaid> yeah
<!cQuaid> and I'll be there all nice and aloneComment: Sometimes it's better for some people to stay out of hell...
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#303364* (?/29) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<TheM-netbook> yeah, "god" is a concept more than an actual thing or state of being
<chaosisorder> Like Duke Nukem Forever?
<TheM-netbook> haha
<TheM-netbook> god is vaporware |
#303368* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Nad> everythings so damned easy in windows
<Nad> and life's too short
<Nad> i could be dead tomorrow
<Nad> in fact i pretty much don't feel that much alive right now
<Nad> maybe i'm dying
<Nad> :(
<eleddy> deep
<eleddy> I had this tshirt once
<eleddy> you only got it if you completed a series of long distance runs in one season
<eleddy> it was god aweful and tie dye
<eleddy> and on the back all it said
<eleddy> was "no whiners"
<eleddy> life IS short. learn linux |
#303371* (?/49) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Party> asians are cool, it's the closest your ever gonna get to fucking an alien |
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