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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..195196197198199200201..596Next> |
#303957* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<IceBox> eat 1 hole glass of pain pills that helps lolo
<AlienDK> Yeah
<AlienDK> but cutting your throat will do pretty much the same
<AlienDK> and you'll die faster too
<IceBox> ya indeed |
#303971* (?/37) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+J0E> i took this dump right
<+J0E> and we got these low flow toilets in our house
<+J0E> that hold very little water
<+J0E> my dump consumed all the water and some
<+J0E> ive noticed they smell a lot more when theres less water
<+J0E> but thats besides the point
<+J0E> what kind of retards take shits that actually fit in these low flow Toilets?
<+J0E> i mean reallyComment: #globalgamers on irc.globalgamers.net
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#304010* (?/39) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Brendan : i got my car detailed... and now it doesnt run
Rohan: hahahahahah WHAT?!
Brendan : idk what happened..
Rohan: detailed = mechanical failure?
Rohan: where did you get it detailed?
Brendan : at pleasanton car was
Rohan: okay, then i'm never going there
Brendan : and i paid $350
Rohan: wtf
Brendan : yea
Brendan : i paid money to have my car broken
Rohan: they probably ran off with half of your engine and are selling it for spare parts?
Brendan : quite possible
Brendan : i have to drive home
Rohan: that's pretty messed up
Brendan : and i dont have AAA
Rohan: ask susan to pick you up!
Brendan : im screweed
Brendan : my insuaranse does not cover death from inexperienced maniac dont know what the heck she is doing drivers
Rohan: hahahahahahahaa |
#304020* (?/37) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
ryandirocco: get me on conf muted, just want to listen to their needs
Gary: they specifically said
Gary: they want you on your knees with mouth open
Gary: idk
ryandirocco: done |
#304029* (?/19) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Ruriko slaps Botmon
<Botmon> Ruriko: Slaps zaennon around with wings made out of wonder woman's mouth.Comment: Botmon is an eggdrop bot with a megahal script
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#304074* (?/45) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Rjx> Can in gay asshole
<@Rjx> I wonder how many gay people actually watch things like that, and whether it's a similar quantity to the number of straight men who like to watch women put cans in their vaginasComment: #geekissues
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#304153* (?/43) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< rm-fr> man
< rm-fr> I already have to shit
< rm-fr> its going to be a hell of a day |
#304235* (?/59) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Xzaf> I use to fall asleep in front of my tablet all the time. But since it was made of stone, it would hurt when I'd fall on it. Ahhhh, those were the days. Back before this "paper" non-sense. And definitely before this electronical whosey-whats-it |
#304247* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<SarcasmOrgasm> anyone use conky?
<SarcasmOrgasm> or know of something similar but better?
<zeleftikam> SarcasmOrgasm» i heard the Aneros ProGasm is pretty good
<SarcasmOrgasm> is that the app name?
<zeleftikam> yeah
<SarcasmOrgasm> lemme see if i can get it from terminal
<zeleftikam> ok
<mh`> ..
<mh`> zeleftikam winsComment: #reddit
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#304259* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< Juerd> Where was I originally defined, when did I get redefined, what wraps around me and what am I wrapping, am I pure, what's the meaning of life? |
#304278* (?/31) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<AK> I know someone at Chester who, as an experiment, grew a plant under his bed.
<FP> Sure.
<FP> Get any bud off of it, or was it destined for the Great Minuscule Quantity O' Hash Afterlife?
<FP> It would've been tiny, so I'd reckon the latter.
<AK> I would go visit him and he'd be like "Let's check on the baby!" and we'd take it out and check on it and stuff.
<FP> Awwwh!
<AK> And yeah, it wasn't enough to smoke lol |
#304301* (?/57) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
11:29 PM - FerretEsquire: what does the emoticon >:S denote?
11:29 PM - *Ünhi | theY4Kman: It denotes the face >:S
FerretEsquire: what emotion is that?
*Ünhi | theY4Kman: I can only describe it as >:S
FerretEsquire: then you are dumb
*Ünhi | theY4Kman: >:S |
#304343* (?/31) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Zombie> msaadn: I can haz cake?
<msaadn> Not unless I get a pie.
<Kuro-chan> sounds... like a tradeoff
<msaadn> Indeed.
<msaadn> Zombie, *link to pic of cake*
<Kuro-chan> yummy-looking cake
<Mikebook> Kuro-chan: sorry to bug you...
<Mikebook> but its a lie.
<Mikebook> its all a lie...
<QS> ...
* QS hugs Kuro. "That's okay, Mike's only saying that because it's actually cheesecake and, thus, a pie.
<Kuro-chan> :(
* Kuro-chan cries in my #Kuro_Korner
* danp huggles Kuro. It;s ok.
<Kuro-chan> :'( |
#304360* (?/41) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Ruhe> Is it sad that even Furries & Juggalos make fun of Hipsters?Comment: #Tacoma on EFNet
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#304461* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
-> #64- faggots
<Laura> wut?
<Laura> wtf was that?
<Laura> HOW YOU DO THAT?!
<Laura> TELL ME NAO BITCH
-> #64- exactly what it looks like, bitches.
* Laura smacks joey
<Laura> ;(
<Laura> how do i do that
<Laura> halp
<Laura> xd
<Laura> xD*
* Laura smacks hubs
<AFinalDate> WUT
<Laura> hubba hubba
<Laura> lmao
<Laura> xD
<Laura> i've been to a gas station called that
<Laura> hubba hubba
<Laura> ;D
<Laura> lmao
<Laura> ;( are you annoyed joey
<Laura> halp
<Laura> i sorry
<Laura> <3333
* Laura makes happi pie for joey
<Laura> EAT IT NAO
<Laura> DO IT
* AFinalDate vomits
<Laura> WTF BITCH
<Laura> NO HAI2U
<Laura> NO FUCKING HAI2U
* Laura cries
<AFinalDate> Notice #channel text
<Laura> oooh
-> #64- faggots
<Laura> oh wtf
<Laura> do you have to type a /?
-Laura:#64- hi bitches
<AFinalDate> lol yes
<Laura> oh dere we go
<Laura> i typed in #channel
<Laura> <.<
<AFinalDate> LMAO
<Laura> SHUT UP
<AFinalDate> LMFAO
<Laura> FUCKING SHUT UP
<AFinalDate> HAHAHAHAHAHA
<Laura> YOU FUCKING
<Laura> SHUT
<Laura> UP
<Laura> NOW
<Laura> IHY!
<Laura> </33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
<Laura> lmao
<AFinalDate> HI IM LAURA AND IM A RETARD AT IRC
<Laura> ;(
<Laura> lmao
<Laura> shut up
* Laura diesComment: HellsWinter / #64
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#304482* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
10:41 Mafaioz and /quote pass youruser:password
10:41 Mafaioz voila
10:41 Mafaioz ur in
10:41 Mafaioz sounds good layzkat
10:41 layzkat in like flin
10:41 Mafaioz i dont care, but good
10:41 Tazen ahhhh i get ya
10:41 Mafaioz finally it sinks in
10:41 Mafaioz wheres my money for a case of beer?
10:41 Mafaioz :p
10:41 Tazen so instead of using port 26911 (my currect znc port) change it to something lower and more likely open
10:41 Tazen I'm broke dude :P
10:41 Mafaioz change it to something thats open
10:41 Mafaioz yes
10:41 Mafaioz ddos comin
10:42 Tazen lmfao |
#304497* (?/41) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<House> Probably like 310% false.
<House> Japanese nuance is more formally structured.
<House> But don't be fooled.
<House> It's still really, really hard.
<LtBrenton> that's what she said.
<House> ....
* House has quit IRC (Quit: )Comment: But she does think it's hard!
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#304507* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Xhu • You gave yourself a migraine by screaming?
Xhu • That's a kind of magic, right there.
Kumi • yes, I did.
Kumi • a good hour and a half ago.
Empireth • Clearly, incentive to stop associating with Xhu.
Xhu • You want to break free of me?
Empireth • You want a worse migraine.
Kumi • ...why did I mention Queen again?
Xhu • Because you're going slightly mad.
Kumi • I just can't get no release :<
Xhu • It's a hard life.
Empireth • To love? Can't help you there.
Kumi • Xhu, you're a boy
Kumi • make a big noise
Xhu • But it's late.
Empireth • C'mon man. Take on the world, someday.
Xhu • I can't. I'm under pressure to breakthru.
Xhu • It's enough to cause a sheer heart attack.
Kumi • somebody better put you back into your place!
Xhu • Well, now I'm here.
Kumi • the show must go on?
Empireth • Clearly. We're princes of the universe.
Xhu • Damn right, and we're gonna tear it up.
AB3JU • I'd tend to think of Kumi as more of a killer queenComment: Yep, they're Queen songs.
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#304523* (?/47) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<FTW> __attribute__((constructor))
<FTW> if used in C, it would be a horrid horrid kludge.
<Pies> FTW: It's a GCC thing
<Pies> It's used for shared objects, when loaded it's supposed to run the constructor, then run the deconstructor when done.
<FTW> ya, I saw the gcc part.
<FTW> so why not just call an init() like done for 15 yrs?
<Pies> Because you can't always
<Pies> The person using the lib might forget to call the deconstructor.
<Pies> This removes the need for the person using the lib to make those calls and potentially eat up gobs of memory.
<FTW> ya, like I said... we've been doing 'init'
<FTW> and 'cleanup' calls in code for 15 yrs with shared libs,
<FTW> and api's.
<FTW> I don't see the need to fuck up C to do so.
<Pies> 1) It's not fucking up C "to do so", it's an extension, you do _not_ have to use it.
<Pies> 2) It means the person using your lib doesn't need to figgure out when to call the deconstructor, this is the important part.
<Pies> If they call abort() the deconstructor can be called and shit can be cleaned up nicely.
<oddballz194> Shit gets cleaned up nicely if you call toilet_flush(), too!
<oddballz194> Or is that flush(toilet)?
<Rolo> fflush(toilet)
<Dfg> someone got shell access to my toilet shell
<Dfg> that fucker is now randomly flushing it
<Dfg> HELP!
<Dfg> how to a restore or revert a toilet account.
<Dfg> The toilet is based on Fedora btw
<whodey> dumbass
<whodey> it's new Toilet().flush()
<Dfg> THAT'S THE FUNCTION!
<Dfg> My Toilet got hacked
<Dfg> anyway to restore it
<Dfg> should I set CHMOD 644 on my toilet seat FS
<Rolo> Yes you should
<Rolo> And quickly!
<Dfg> But if I do 777
<Rolo> Don't question me boy, 544
<Dfg> Okay I will try
<Rolo> It's one hundred less than 644, you're saving KB
<Dfg> DAMMIT
<Dfg> It's giving me an error
<Dfg> file in use something
<Dfg> SOMEONE IS USING MY TOILET!
<Dfg> wtf
<Dfg> damn hackers
<whodey> NEVER EVER EVER type the following
<whodey> cat /etc/toilet |
#304558* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
psycho9x : gonna be home tonight
vivalavolvo: prolly
psycho9x: im going to bestow some angry birds upon you
vivalavolvo: i killed my battery the other day marathoning on it
psycho9x: i meant the parakeets but lol
vivalavolvo: oh hahaComment: he's giving me some bird he does not want.
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#304586* (?/59) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@pierut> don't copy that floppy.
<@Coolty> don't dd that cd
<@Coolty> HA HA HA!
<@Coolty> Linux joke
<@Coolty> XD
<@pierut> xD
<@Coolty> yeah, i went there.Comment: irc.digitalrebels.org
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#304600* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<vininim> hi, i'm jacques derrida and I propose methods for text analysis, but it's not text analysis, ok? lol
<vininim> hi, i'm baudelaire I smoke opium and write non-sense, I'm a poet. lol
<vininim> hi, i'm deleuze and i have buttseks with foucault, gave me some spotlight. lol |
#304605* (?/31) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@llearch> I _AM_ Science! |
#304609* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* opnet has joined
<opnet> wooo
<opnet> got laid last night
* opnet isn't a virgin
<opnet> anymore |
#304612* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Kaepora is a cat
* Jack-is is a hare
< Kaepora> I am a cat!
< Jack-is> I am a hare!
< Kaepora> Would you like a hare-cat?
<@Jack-is> Kaepora: That would be quite cat-haretic.Comment: #anapnea irc.freenode.net
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