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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..300301302303304305306..599Next> |
#3800 (129/308) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<JibberJim> what should happen to your webpages if you drop dead?
<Jumper> is this a trick question ? |
#3876 (110/260) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Infe> damn, i hate buying a computer part, you always see a better deal the next day
<AlmtyBob> not me
<ryo-ohki> Just steal stuff, and you won't have that problem.
<Infe> but then they buy something newer and better to replace what you stole
<Infe> and you have to steal again! |
#4004 (125/297) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Tony> a hand job..10 dollars, a blowjob..25 dollars, full sex..50 dollars, a long lasting relationship..priceless. There are some things money can buy, for everything else, theres blackmail. |
#4016 (125/297) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<djglitch> i'm thinking about getting the front desk chix number just to see if i still have it in me
<djglitch> she is sexy
<tyne> lol
<tyne> u got her number
<tyne> "0" |
#4285 (112/265) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<mightyflo> TP-PS2 667 Remote Control: Infrared Transmitter for PS/PS2
<mightyflo> "Put your gamepad away and watch DVDs with a wireless remote, just like the pros use! Yeah, pro DVD watchers, that's right."
<SukiPotato4> Yeah, I have my bachelors in law, but my masters in DVD watching |
#5362 (111/262) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<RvLeshrac> I wonder about stores that get shot up in movies.
<RvLeshrac> What do they say when it's all over with?
<RvLeshrac> "Hello, Mutual Insurance? Yes, I'd like to know if my policy covers gangland shootouts." |
#5463 (123/292) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Frizz0> anyone want a compaq proliant raid server 256M hardware raid p-pro200
<Frizz0> its about to get sold for drugs
<k5sss> payment in drugs, or payment in cash to buy drugs?
<Frizz0> either way is fine |
#5490 (126/300) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<theForger> it's kind of odd how a lot of planets in star trek have spaceships and transporters, and yet they still live in huts and clay houses |
#6056 (146/351) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Guyver3> koolaid time
<Guyver3> what today
<Guyver3> strawberry kiwi
<Guyver3> strawberry kiwi lemonade
<Guyver3> mountain berry blast
<Guyver3> or blood of the preacher's daughter?
<kingmob> the blood one. definitely. |
#6731 (117/281) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<mynx> hahaha i had a construction worker holler at me today
<Wurzle> he said "YOU FUCKING HOMO GET AWAY FROM MY BUIDING SITE!" |
#6757 (94/220) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Belhade> my gf wanted to use Saran Wrap one night when we didn't have anything else
<Belhade> I was like, uhm, no, it's a dick, not a turkey sandwich
<Dipstick`> it's beef... but not that kind of beef
<Belhade> caucasian...the other white meat |
#7194 (141/337) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<nit`zZz> I was lovin that pussy while she was lovin this dick, I was shovin it in her while she was yellin dont quit
<NGN-_-> Then you realized you were dreamin that shit - in real life your a no-pussy gettin prick |
#7772 (110/260) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<ph^pr0phet> i got kicked in the balls earlier in the summer
<chaowork> ouch
<Booger> hah
<chaowork> by a chick?
<Booger> try to NOT do that
<ph^pr0phet> yea
<ph^pr0phet> heh
<Booger> or wear a nutcup
<chaowork> u need to learn to stand sideways when u hit on em |
#7859 (111/266) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Kat> I just got an email from Horny Orgy Babes.
<Kat> oh gee... I wonder what it's about
<kmds> rhinocerous calves studying organic chemistry? |
#8373 (143/343) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<leena> has anyone heard of the lord of the rings
<Serge_of_Aruni> NO, WHAT IS THAT?
<Serge_of_Aruni> IS THAT SOME CARNIVAL GAME?
<Serge_of_Aruni> WITH BOTTLES AND HOOPS? |
#8687 (118/280) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Ryk> "let's be friends" is what chicks say when they're feeling guilty about shafting someone.
<Ryk> they don't mean it.
<Ryk> they mean the kind of friends that never speak and never see each other.
<Tippytoes> thats the best kind of friends |
#8919 (125/297) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
* zebra does the menstrual blood dance
<Slvrchair> zebra: your dances scare me.
<zebra> You should see them in person.
<zebra> It could be worse.
<zebra> I could give you the menstrual blood lapdance :P
<Slvrchair> ew, no :P |
#10505 (105/247) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<cj_> i hate it when someone at work has to point out to me that my
shirt is both inside out and backwards.
<jej> is it?
<cj_> it is.
<cj_> i pulled the whole Fashion Statement routine.. |
#10746 (115/273) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Cuban Atlas> See, Zeir, FD is smart..He ops himself the moment he enters
<FD> This way I can abuse the power faster
<Polo> That's the American way
<FD> Damn right |
#11123 (160/386) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Spike> You know what I want to do? I want to go on eBay and buy all the
souvenier pieces of the Berlin wall, then reconstruct it along the Mexican border |
#11177 (127/303) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Gav3in> I've been in Taipei though, and holy shit does it have a big chinatown |
#260 (171/415) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Guilty> Pen, you're going to hae to give something up
<Guilty> You cant go to a gym and run geekissues.org |
#538 (155/376) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<MadHatter> what you know about people and the way things work I could comfortably pass through the hole in my penis |
#1728 (166/402) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Jeffwey> i will buy a camoflouged condom so u wont see me coming |
#2230 (119/284) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<DAL9000> kalms isnt here! now whose leg will i hump? ;(
<SlasherX> hump michaels
<SlasherX> never seen him around. give him a warm welcome
*** michael__ has quit IRC (bye) |
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