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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..140141142143144145146..596Next> |
#16230 (212/348) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
([m1]) teresa do you remember what i told you about the playground mentality of guys?
(resa) playground?
(resa) they only think about sex?
([m1]) no teresa
([m1]) that boys in elementary school would pick on girls they like
(Mog2) i'd hate to know how teresa connected the playground to thinking about sex |
#17212 (212/366) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DarkMyst> Where do Babies come from? The woman or the man????
<OlEnglish> the stork
<OlEnglish> but who fucks the stork?
<DarkMyst> good question |
#19445 (213/384) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<*AGBot> grins.
<Eye_Candy> SEE?
<*AGBot> I'm not a bot.
<Eye_Candy> DID ANYONE ELSE SEE THAT!?!
<Vic> See what?
<Zero> See what?
<Eye_Candy> god dammit.
<*AGBot> Kill, Ross... Kill them all.
* Eye_Candy rocks gently, whispering 'there IS a bot, there IS a bot' |
#20473 (212/404) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tps-> dude
<tps-> they used nmap in the matrix
<tps-> HEH
<tps-> im serious
<_static_> hah
<tps-> in the new movie
<tps-> lol
<tps-> it shows a shot of a linux terminal
<tps-> and a sh shell
<tps-> and it shows nmap running
<tps-> and 1 port was found
<_static_> surprised keanu could figure that stuff out
<tps-> i was like HOLY CRAP THATS NMAP
<tps-> and my friends just stared at me
<tps-> it was trinity
<_static_> probably had to have a stunt computer user |
#25193 (212/372) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CrazySpence> my moms like "do you have the paper towels" *i hand them over* "I know you use them for jerking off" *laughs and closes the door* |
#28739 (212/396) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+n0th1ng> after sex like 3 times a day with a girl, jacking off is really gay
<xcp> no, having sex with a guy is gay |
#28892 (212/370) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@demalavor> I finally got to try krispy kreme
<@demalavor> <3
<@demalavor> the lady there scared me though
<@demalavor> I walked in and she jumped out from the corner and was like "FREE SAMPLE YAAAAA!!" |
#32820 (212/422) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
• +mirthy throws geru into the deep Xenogears ocean!
(+mirthy) ¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´
(+mirthy) ¸.·´¯`·.¸¸¸.·´¯`·.¸\o/¸.·´¯`·.¸.·´¯`
(+mirthy) ¸.·´¯`·.¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸ |
#13526 (211/383) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* Huz cries.
*** Huz has quit IRC (Excess Flood) |
#15183 (211/397) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<deimos> someone asked me some ungodly complex question in an interview once
<deimos> it took him 5 minutes to explain it
<rwhom> did you get it right?
<deimos> and then they looked at me
<deimos> and wanted a single part answer
<deimos> so i thought for a second
<cj_> <deimos> and i said, "potatoe". i didn't get the job. |
#16379 (211/404) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<outcaste> ROTFBMALFO!
<outcaste> Rolling On The Floor Because My Artificial Limbs Fell Off |
#16504 (211/371) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Clitlover> I am not into that.
<Clitlover> How about roleplay?
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> ok
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> i'll be the dungeon master |
#16977 (211/359) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Uzzie> i'm sueing herbal essences
<Uzzie> i didn't get orgasms |
#18681 (212/375) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<xxFrogxx> Today when I was at the gym, I caught this dood checking out my weiner.
<Spazmatic> Did you like it?
<xxFrogxx> It was like, I felt violated and flattered at the same time.
<OriginalWheat> Yeap, youre gay |
#19307 (211/347) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Monsoon`> grrr
<Monsoon`> WHERE IS BROADBAND WHEN YOU WANT IT?
<Monsoon`> poor little dialup is brought to its knees by pr0n like that
<Monsoon`> whatever happened to thumbnails leading to larger images?
<skitz> Monsoon`: doesnt work like that with porn. thumbnails lead to ads
<Monsoon`> it didn't used to be that way
<skitz> you're doing a "back in the day" rant for PORN?! christ |
#28725 (211/403) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tekneeq-> i just realized my ethernet cable reaches all the way to the bathroom
<tekneeq-> IM TAKING A DUMP RIGHT NOW
<tekneeq-> this is great
<tekneeq-> i could spend all day in here |
#28979 (211/361) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<yelworc> i need a registration code for "the all seeing eye"
<splice> if it were really "all seeing" wouldn't it know you didn't pay for it |
#29305 (211/405) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ath> you're too BITTAR
<X-Ultron> haha
<X-Ultron> tell that to all the nutcases that i encounter on the streets of harrisburg
<X-Ultron> the other day, i was out getting lunch
<X-Ultron> and i saw a black impala ss
<X-Ultron> so i was admiring it
<X-Ultron> and as i turned around
<X-Ultron> this bum walks up to me with his fist extended
<X-Ultron> "yoooo!!! it's been a long time! you can see that I shaved mine off [he was referring to my goatee]"
<X-Ultron> then i'm just standing there with a blank look on my face
<X-Ultron> and this dude does this weird handshake thing
<X-Ultron> then whispers "i'm a fisherman" and walks away
<Supachikn> hahahah
<Supachikn> oh my god
<X-Ultron> first thing i did was check to make sure i still had my wallet and keys :BComment: #hydrogenaudio on freenode
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#29463 (211/365) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<a_passerby> fuck, well, i got an offer to be keyboardist/pianist for a band for "funk music"
<a_passerby> but i dont listen to funk music
<a_passerby> and the guy who asked me is a moron
<a_passerby> "yeah man, i dont use kazaa anymore. you know your computer broadcasts an ip address?"
<a_passerby> thats an EXACT QUOTE
<Everdraed-sleepytime> MY GOD AN IP ADDRESS
<Everdraed-sleepytime> MY HOUSE IS BROADCASTiNG A STREET ADDRESS |
#29832 (211/435) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Gabe> is my mic working?
<Antagony> Wait, what? I didn't hear what you were talking about
<Antagony> How do I turn it up?
<Kurt> this is the best conversation ever
<Kurt> it's like watching a blind guy try to put on a condomComment: The joy of voicechat
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#31906 (211/439) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< zYgoat> i want to start a company selling human milk
< andyfied> look at their little faces
< zYgoat> i think it'd be hilarious
< zYgoat> hire women
< zYgoat> hook up the suction cups
< zYgoat> then have them do telemarketing work while the tubes suck their teats
< andyfied> suddenly this channel is bash-worthy
< zYgoat> see i should be making money with this instead of chatting
< zYgoat> hell
< andyfied> go for it
< zYgoat> i could sell the video footage
< zYgoat> earn three ways
< andyfied> yeah, best. plan. ever.
17:24 <@Scoth> I'm sure there's someone out there who'd buy it :) |
#162497 (211/577) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
jdbugg87: ok i just ripped a cd...what the hell is .ogg
adanedhel728: it's a file extension, kind of like "doc" is short for "document," "ogg" is short for "oh good god, what an annoying file format" |
#176290 (211/265) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+Tiberius> i get my women the same way a lion gets his prey
<+int16h> Stalking them?
<Ves> idiots who fall in the cage? |
#307755 (211/241) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Black_Prince> I haven't left house for 7 days now!
<Black_Prince> :D
<AdmiralA> oh great, people are bragging about not going outside like it's uptime now
<AdmiralA> $ indoors
<AdmiralA> 21:40 not seen light in 2 days, 6:39, 3 meals, kcal averages: 0.23 0.13 0.09 |
#309047 (212/234) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Erasmus> Just cracked my genuine copy of Windows that kept complaining at me that it was non-Genuine. So now it's non-Genuine but at least it thinks it is again. |
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