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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..66676869707172..596Next> |
#176033 (144/254) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<tl> I can't believe I just searched google to learn how to make a tuna sandwich |
#112057 (125/253) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Darkmark> Failure is nature's way of saying "Insert coin to continue" |
#111790 (369/543) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<maherarar> I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ONCE IN 1989 AND I NEVER LOOKED BACK. |
#296574 (442/680) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<jd998> nuh girls can 2
<jd998> but its not like our cum its like water but clear
<sweetangel13> rly?
<sweetangel13> i've never done it
<jd998> ok
<jd998> well how do u no when to stop
<sweetangel13> i dunno. it feels good for a while and i just decide to stop...
<sweetangel13> im afraid of my parents walking in
<jd998> y how do u do it
<jd998> liekon ur bed or with ur nikers on
<sweetangel13> at night i get on my bed and put my covers over me
<jd998> n wat
<jd998> pull ur nikers down
<sweetangel13> then i take my panties off and rub some vaseline on my fingers
<jd998> ok y vaseline
<sweetangel13> it makes it easier
<sweetangel13> then i stick my fingers in there...
<jd998> nice nice
<sweetangel13> and start moving it around.
<jd998> u got msn
<sweetangel13> no sorry
<jd998> fuk yer
<jd998> how many fingers have u had in ur pussy before
<sweetangel13> and eventually i get 2 fingers in there
<sweetangel13> then i put some vaseline on my other hand
<sweetangel13> and start rubbing my penis.
<jd998> wat |
#112827 (508/638) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
[carbine] My manager has a shortcut to "Show Desktop" on her desktop.. |
#248521 (123/331) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Ricks937> I have a totally awesome hat :)
<Chroder> is it one of those gay artsy hats
<Chroder> like the one the walrus in mythbusters always wears |
#261519 (575/679) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<greenocide> Had to give report over censorship today.
<greenocide> So I put in a pr0n vid and they made me turn it off. |
#299802 (156/304) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<nikki93> I guess I'll make a video of some GraLL 2 level editing. First I need to get this Linux screen recording thing to work with OpenGL apps.
<nikki93> Ok, so turrets it is.
<nikki93> Now lets think about the turret's design.
<nikki93> I'm thinking it'll be like a 'pole'. Out of the top of the pole, 'laser' shots come out and toward you.
<nikki93> The 'pole' periodically goes into the 'base' and then comes back 'out'.
<nikki93> When it's out, it's shooting time. When it's in, it's taking... 'rest'. The 'rest' period is when you have to run.
<metabol> It's ok to say penis if you mean penis.
<nikki93> -_- |
#299795 (2005/2275) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<popemichael> I was in line to buy a new DVD player. The woman in front of me was having something delivered.
<popemichael> The clerk asked for her 'street name' she replied "I don't have one I go by Shanice." |
#299781 (402/560) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Hobbesy: Ghost, this is an intervention
Hobbesy: You're obviously a raging alchoholic
Ghostrider: No I'm fine
Ghostrider: why?
Hobbesy: No Ghost
Hobbesy: It has to stop
Ghostrider: *sigh*
Ghostrider: where did I post? |
#299780 (398/576) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< fawkesmulder> the only thing impenetrable to hackers are vaginas |
#299771 (47/201) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< Libster> whoa the sex pistols are still active?
< CESSMASTER> yes, they like to stay active
< CESSMASTER> jazzercise
< CESSMASTER> and bingo |
#299721 (179/295) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<CStubing> man... just heard on cnbc.. "Let's listen in as the moment of silence begins."Comment: 9/11 Rememberance Telecast
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#299714 (237/363) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Tkavil> I have to type up a speech of my life
<Tkavil> about 2 minutes long in french
<DerKapitan> bonjour. bon nombre d'entre vous ne me connaissent pas. Je voudrais partager quelques choses. Je n'ai jamais su quel genre j'ai voulu pour être, ainsi vous pourriez dire que je suis niether. au moins après la chirurgie le mois prochain.
<DerKapitan> there. your speech is written.
<Tkavil> let me translate that
<Tkavil> hello. many of you do not know me. Let me share a few things. I never knew what kind I wanted to be, so you could say I am niether. at least after the surgery next month.
<Tkavil> ...... |
#232561 (307/461) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* WolfLord np: Draft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger [04:15m/128Kbps/44KHz]
<LLamaBoy> draft punk?
<LLamaBoy> is that the unfinished version? |
#297669 (613/731) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@baka> anyone here ever eaten sushi off a naked woman?
<Sloshed> no thanks
<@baka> i'm intrigued
<@Sadrak> I'd volunteer to do the dishes |
#296656 (138/298) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@HyperHacker> lol wut
<@HyperHacker> I was just about to fap
<@HyperHacker> and then a song came on
<@HyperHacker> "Grip - Every Little Thing"
<@HyperHacker> D: |
#296031 (92/218) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(+winterwyn): The asterisk of Judaism illustrates their inclusiveness and technological savvy by utilizing a string wildcard. |
#235397 (363/497) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Smidge204> Asperger's syndrome is most commonly contracted by reading the Wikipedia article on Asperger's syndrome. |
#117877 (326/452) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<WeirdAl> !seen peterv
<firebot> peterv was last seen 2 weeks, 6 days, 15 hours, 2 minutes and 31 seconds ago, saying '* peterv looks for a place to hide' in #developers
<Wolf> guess he found one.Comment: irc.mozilla.org #developers
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#116110 (172/340) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<ednos> root, help!
<ednos> the only language available is British English!
<root> ?
<ednos> I don't speak that!
<root> lol
<root> you'll survive
<root> it doesn't prevent you typing your posts in american
<ednos> I won't know which button submits
<ednos> is it "prevaricate about the bush" or "spot o' milk"?Comment: #taskforceranger on irc.gamesurge.net
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#190588 (157/327) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(Sweet^Angel) hi
(Sweet^Angel) im banned
(Sweet^Angel) from some channel
(Sweet^Angel) by ip
(Sweet^Angel) what to do to come back?
(Sweet^Angel) ???????????????????????????
(Sweet^Angel) ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????????
(phlux) do you remember the nickname of the person that banned you?
(Sweet^Angel) never
(phlux) type /quit theirnick to make them quit IRC. Then you will be let back in.
(Sweet^Angel) #Dubai unable to join channel (address is banned)
<-- Sweet^Angel has quit (Quit: theirnick to make them quit IRC. Then you will be let back in) |
#169868 (127/283) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<+Tim__> `hey al, tell me all about your day` > /dev/null |
#299616 (366/500) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
xplicitbruno: can someone tell me whats wrong with this : $sql_table_teams = $table_prefix."teams"
Mango: Missing semicolon.
xplicitbruno: Mango can u tell me where exactly or just correct the line i typed above ( i am new at this so dont know much yet )
Mango: At the end of the line.
xplicitbruno: like this
xplicitbruno: $sql_table_teams = $table_prefix."teams"]
Mango: Oh, wow. I don't know what to say to that one
Mango: I was going to give you the link to a page of PHP tips for newbies but I think you may need more help than I can offer. |
#299613 (273/501) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Stormscape> Yo dawg we heard you like Macs so we only put one pedal in your car |
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