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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..68697071727374..596Next> |
#297077 (297/395) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Erik> First catch from a dating site stopped replying because I was being "too intellectual".
<Erik> Second one thought I was "too good for her".
<Erik> Third one rejected me because I mentioned I enjoyed Dragonlance novels.
<Erik> Oh well, can't stop now.
<dd7> erik's finally coming out of the basement |
#296810 (199/323) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<nuclearrabbit> So I was talking to SPC Guyette and he was tellin his lulz from Iraq stories
<nuclearrabbit> Like when the gunner in their hummer threw all the shit from his MRE he didn't want to eat to some kids on the side of the road
<nuclearrabbit> and yelled
<nuclearrabbit> "It's an IED of flavor!"
<nuclearrabbit> But the driver only heard "it's an IED" and swerved off the road |
#296081 (458/578) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<urbex> neat....Niagara Falls is ~12,000 years old
<dopey> what was there 12,001 years ago?
<Bunsen> The interesting thing about Niagara Falls is the way it's been eating its way up the river over those tens of thousands of years.
<Bunsen> When it gets back to Lake Erie, it'll pretty much drain the lake and reduce it to the Erie River.
<niteshad> Bunsen: that'll suck for all those ports along Lake Erie, like Cleveland.
<dopey> niteshad: Not at all. It just means that cleveland can expand north like it has longed to do for ~12,000 years.
<Bunsen> niteshad: If we're not shipping goods in fusion-powered spacecraft by the time it happens, then we suck as a species and deserve the fate of having to build more Cleveland. |
#294521 (459/551) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<&qqhax> guys guys
<&qqhax> this is fucking epic right now
<&qqhax> so, my comcast cable box wasn't working
<&qqhax> so i went into the diagnostic menu to play with the frequencies
<&qqhax> and found the menu that lets you enable the dvr even thought i'm not paying for it
<&qqhax> so anyway
<&qqhax> i enable the dvr and reboot the box
<&qqhax> then go to the dvr menu
<&qqhax> comcast gave me a used box
<&qqhax> that has 120gb
<&qqhax> 64% of it is ppv porn. |
#220584 (150/246) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<SilverDrake> I don't fall in love with actors all that much
<SilverDrake> mostly 'cuz it breaks my heart when they go and become Scientologists |
#115623 (272/432) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<ellington8> whats a 999 error?
<blynzoo> A german argument. |
#299398 (149/221) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<pheand_> talking to my mother is like getting a back rub from Edward Scissorhands |
#230486 (109/205) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<OOPz> 'who had flown from American to give evidence' - the independant
<OOPz> does nobody proof read any more?
<wiseman303> no
<wiseman303> they have spell cheque! |
#234739 (58/178) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< pegwole> hrm it's 64 degrees out
< Kajarii> cool
< pegwole> is it bad that when i read that i wanted to put a k on the end of 64?
< pegwole> god i'm such a geek
< Kajarii> Yeah, I'd have worried even more if you'd said it was 0x40 degrees out.Comment: #linuxcranks
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#118709 (82/194) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<ChuckD> i see Tab in movies alot
<ChuckD> i demand an explination
<ChuckD> i dont see tab anywhere
<Towwb> Tab went to the same place as No Fear and sneakers with lights in them
<Towwb> MC Hammer's there too, not being touched |
#112058 (-5/271) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* Joins: Saaz
<Saaz> hi guys
<Saaz> can you help me a bit?
<Saaz> ive been trying to learn japanese from anime, but i have some troubles with understanding
<Saaz> how "Hello" would be in japanese?
<shimbo> Konichiwa, I guess
<Saaz> thx
<Saaz> and how it would be "Thank you"?
<shimbo> Arigato
<Saaz> thx
<Saaz> and how it would be "Remove that tentacle from my anus"?
<Saaz> kekekeke
<Saaz> TO THE BAT CAVE!!
* Parts: Saaz
<hixo> haha |
#299533 (707/867) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Dr_Pressure> in Old English, a period (.) was used to denote the end of a sentence.
<Dr_Pressure> in modern English, "lol" is used to end a sentence lol |
#297804 (101/303) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
*** Alver hums a cheery tune
*** griffon trys to figure out why libpthread.so is being linked to his app
*** ianj buys a domain name
*** TriOx jailbreaks his iphone 3GS
*** Alver steals TriOx' iphone, runs a webserver on it, hijacks ianj's domain, makes it show goatse.cz from the httpd on the iphone, and lures griffon into thinking it's a page on libpthread.so
<Alver> MO-MO-MO-MONSTER KILLLLL |
#299563 (234/320) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Alyssa: soo, how are we going to be awesome? i leave what we're doing up to you, cause i just sit around
Marc Truant: pshhh, anything
Marc Truant: we could watch a movie or hang at the mall. maybe chill at a house. fuck. anything!
Alyssa: okayy :D it's up to you
Marc Truant: you didnt catch that, did you?
Alyssa: ...oh |
#294356 (38/184) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Methofelis: Damn you, robin!
Methofelis: Damn yooooou!
ape: yes, fuck you, robin. I hope you rot, die, and you get kids that you survive as parents thrice over
ape: because your kids also rotted and died, but a lot sooner than you
robin: ape: Do they rot and die before I have to pay for college? |
#105688 (566/708) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<QBeep> Reminds me of one of my fevorite moments...
<QBeep> I've just finished changing a tire that went flat on the way to delivering a pizza. I'm covered in mud, grease, and black tire grime.
<QBeep> My right hand is bleeding, my face is smudged.
<chillin_work> attractive
<QBeep> I'm standing on this customer's porch, with a pizza that was ordered from the Pizza Hut web site. The customer opens the door, and what falls out of my mouth is,
<QBeep> "Hi, ma'am, I'm from the Internet"... |
#299486 (-2/162) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Augustine> Did the day sneak up on you? :o
<Samael> always does
<Samael> most of the time i kick it's ass
<Samael> which is where night comes fromComment: #/x/ irc.netchan.org
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#299441 (-1/201) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
-!- dbguy [dbguy@tohveli.net] has quit [Ping timeout: 240 seconds]
<@Rjx> dbguy
<@Rjx> I wonder what sort of person identifies with databases so strongly as to use them in a nickComment: #geekissues
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#298199 (95/207) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@swight> cottage cheese is basically curds and whey isn't it?
<@Rjx> I think it's just the curds part
< dunn> i dont eat anything that rhymes with turd
<@Rjx> pretty sure you've eaten a bird |
#295930 (216/340) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Kaichu1> NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
<Kaichu1> OH MY GOD
<Kaichu1> I just realized something
<Kaichu1> I e-mailed one of my teachers about missing a class last week and how to make up the test
<Kaichu1> He sent back a message of what to do
<Kaichu1> And then ended with kind of a harsh warning about my grades and how it would affect me passing the course
<Kaichu1> He ended the message with jk
<Kaichu1> I just realized that JK are his initials
<Kaichu1> GODDAMMIT
<Kaichu1> I'm so screwed
<Kaichu1> brb, speeding over to the school |
#185341 (80/204) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@utonium> * QUESTION * SECRET of 793722, worth 100 points: acronym soup: dap?
<+PaulATL> d
<+trueeevil> no d?
<+trueeevil> lol?
<+SuzyCat> wha?
<+Zyloch> lol
<the_bandi> parents against dyslexia
<@utonium> Yes! the_bandi! got the answer QUESTION(240576) -> parents against dyslexia <- in 34 seconds and recieves --> 70 <-- points!Comment: #trivia on EFNet
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#185231 (165/281) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Valtieri> Hey, guess what. I just pirated an mp3 of "Finish What Ya Started"
<Valtieri> The last 30 seconds are cut off |
#138939 (99/193) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Zaphod> All games are crap with a gamepad.
<Zaphod> I'd like to have a go on a steering wheel setup, just once.
<PetrDoubt> Get one!
<Nugget> it makes a world of difference
<PetrDoubt> It's really, really nice.
<Zaphod> nah, not worth buying one.
<Zaphod> But when they start making real cars with cursor keys instead of steering wheels, I'll be ready! |
#137186 (132/222) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< stiv2k> so, i have to write a term paper on a 'controversial text'... any ideas? just spit them out
<JimmyDee_> satanic verses
< stiv2k> ahah
< spb> the holy bible
< stiv2k> that would be surely interesting
< fred> Novell's agreement with microsoft ¬_¬Comment: #defocus on freenode
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#299450 (47/153) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Travis> dang IRC is still laggin like a *****
<FoH> and stars are mighty lagged, being light years away |
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