<timmo> anytime i yell at a woman and im really angry i think CUNT
<timmo> i only say it half the time though
<timmo> its like the a bomb of yelling at a woman
<snow_> i've had worse experiences calling a girl fat than a cunt
<timmo> how about you fat cunt
<snow_> haven't tried that one
<timmo> you know, cover your bases
<Alphamaze> In my experience, calling a girl a cunt will get her angry, while calling her fat will make her sad.
<Alphamaze> Calling her a fat cunt will result in a woman that is confused about her emotions.
[nickeax] If you could be any monarch, which would you choose?
[Hex] batman
[robzy] batman
<@Sebas_> Hahaha, there's a book called "Modern Financial Accounting" in one of our book cases, and according to the back text, you can read it "for pleasure or by necessity."
<@Sebas_> Who the FUCK reads a 1000 page book on fucking accounting for pleasure?
<coil> i dont like what bleeds
<ShadowHntr> did i just wreck your haiku?
<[1NF0]> you got the center
< MacForker> Arg, my family is weird.
< MacForker> They just argued with me you can't serve pork medium.
< tonyola> conventional wisdom is that pork should be thoroughly cooked
< MacForker> Sure, 20 years ago
< CuriosTiger> Conventional wisdom is that pork from 20 years ago should not be eaten :P
<crschmidt> twitter is terrible
<crschmidt> but i use it as well
<crschmidt> i, in fact, twitterd from the altar, when I got married
<crschmidt> and 6 phones in the audience went off
<Arang> I hate when I have to turn off a computer by holding the power button
<Arang> it just feels way too visceral
<Arang> like I'm holding a pillow over its head
<Arang> "ARANG WHYYYGHGHGHBLGBHGBL"
<Arang> "mfff mfffffff"
<Fax> *windows sound*
<ccr> the thing about JVM is that it will almost never free memory it has once allocated from host. it has, at least historically, been a mistake to run anything else than one Java-based service per server instance.
<Chainsaw> Indeed. The memory allocation strategy of Java can be described in 3 words.
<Chainsaw> Nom nom nom.
<Tyala> ... So Colonization has this system for educating your non-specialist colonists into specialized ones.
<Tyala> Except this always changes the graphic of the unit to the specialist graphic.
<Tyala> You can put Missionaries in native american tribes to convert some of them, giving you Converted Native units.
<Tyala> ... Then you can educate them in the school... but... this turns their graphic to.. a white man.
<Tyala> .... That's some pretty hardcore conversion there.
<Tyala> I'm pretty sure affirmative action students don't come out of college white.
<Tyala> Even more disturbing, one and only one of the specialist types uses a female for the graphic. So you can also educate their penis away O.o
<CapnStrongnose> it kills the mood when you cum in your own eye
<colin> someone told me to take a box of kleenex when i went to auschwitz the first time
<colin> SEVEN HOURS i was there, and there was NOTHING worth jerking off to
<+Kirjava> it's not incest
<+Kirjava> our parents are divorced
<logicus_> hey hello, i found the followoing set intuitively appealing {{ }, {{ }}, {{ }, {{ }}}, {{ }, {{ }}, {{ }, {{ }}}}, {{ }, {{ }}, {{ }, {{ }}}, {{ }, {{ }}, {{ }, {{ }}}}}}, is there a mathematical reason?
<Polytope> is schizophrenia a mathematical reason?
<h0dg3s> anyone here good with vista and domains?
<NoMoreNicksLeft> Yes. I'm a Vista expert.
<NoMoreNicksLeft> What's your question?
<h0dg3s> I have a vista pc that was deleted out of AD and it won't let me log on locally
<h0dg3s> son ofnm, reboot worked
<NoMoreNicksLeft> That'll be $75. Rounded up to the hour, of course.
<Mike_W> my toilet is having issues, evidently i've been blaming my cat for pissing in the basement by error
<Mike_W> when my toilet is flushed, my furnace in the basement gets a golden shower
<Worf> and then the furnace turns on and the smell propagates throughout the house
<Mike_W> it's not a _lot_ an ounce out of a gallon
<Mike_W> but over time that's been the cause of this issue i've been near ready to get rid of my cat over
<Mike_W> and enough to rust out the top of the furnace ductwork
<Mike_W> I found the issue today when i was rebooting the terrastation after the power outage and mary was upstairs. she flushed the toilet, I got wet (terrastation is next to furnace)
<Mike_W> it doesn't propagate through the house thankfully, it's just in the basement area
<Mike_W> i've been trying to find where the cat was pissing for a month
<Mike_W> turns out it's been me all along...sigh
<&Brat> So, I had an awkward moment this morning.
<&Brat> My dad found one of the pairs of panties that I keep lying around to dress up in sometimes, but this in itself wasn't why it was so awkward
<@TeTarga> They where wet?
< centaur> He tried them on?
<&Brat> I had had Emily over late a couple of days before New Years and we spent the night up in my quarters watching movies. Now, Emily is only just a little bit bigger than I am so it's plausible that the panties were hers, and that's what I think he assumed
<&Brat> And he thinks we had sex when she was over
< centaur> lol score.
<&Brat> So he handed them over and said "I found this in your laundry basket... good job son"
< centaur> He is like yay, you're not gay!
<@TeTarga> Hahahaha
<&Brat> It was just totally awkward. I wasn't sure what he was talking about for a second and then he said "Yeah, I used to take trophies too"
<&Brat> And I was like "oh yeah, totally" and came back upstairs with them
<stay> have you ever browsed Yahoo Answers religion section?
<stay> i swear
<stay> its where the idea for 4chan came from
<+endemDan> i need to find a new job, where customers are not so retarded
<@Gusterbuster> Someone call you and say 'Can you hear me now?'
<+endemDan> no i have had that happen before, but this is even worse
<+endemDan> a customer calls in support from their cell and says she cant find the function she wants to take a pic with
<+endemDan> so i get her phone model blah blah blah, then ask what exactly shes trying to do
<+endemDan> she says 'i see pictures of people where they are holding their phone and are in the picture themselves, how do i take a picture of myself and my phone if the camera does not come off the phone'
<+endemDan> she continues with 'also how are they getting a picture of themselves from the front if i can see the flash?, like the camera is facing away from them during the picture. how do i do that?'
<+endemDan> i couldnt even respond or laugh, i was just in complete awe that someone was actually serious about this question
<+endemDan> then i asked her if she has ever looked at herself in the mirror, and freaks out thinking i just called her ugly or some shit and demands to speak to my manager
<+endemDan> so i put her on hold, get him over and tell him the story and he doesnt believe me and gets on the phone and has her repeat everything she said and then asks her about the complaint against me
<+endemDan> he asks her the same exact thing (it has been about 10 minutes since the call started) and then, then she finally gets it and understands that taking a picture in a mirror is how the people do it
<+endemDan> i dont understand how people like that function in life
<@Gusterbuster> Yea. However you get to sit on your ass all day and answer a phone
<@Gargamale> word
<mademoiselle> excel
<+fiveiron> powerpoint
<+fiveiron> By your powers combined, I'm an overpriced office suite!
Meudi: Dude, I think I fell asleep
CSpatriot: Why do you think that?
Meudi: Because I woke up
<Jake> I had an awesome moment in my college
<Jake> We had a video project due, and this group of wanna-be programmers were saying how theirs was so awesome
<Jake> While they weren't looking, I yelled "WE SUCK PENIS" and added it into the slide show after one of the people said "What do we do?"
<Dan> LOL
<Jake>They must have caught me
<Jake>When the day came, while waiting for the part
<Jake>One of the guy asks "Jake, what does your family do every Wednesday night?"
<Jake>In my voice, it yelled "WE SUCK PENIS"
<Jake>I should've been mad... but I was far too astounded to be mad..
<Kandarin> Ahoy.
<EugeneK> Dongs
<Kandarin> Good to see things haven't changed.
xoebus: *sigh* One of my flatmates just asked "Where is Admiral Ackbar from?", I replied "Mon Calamari". He then said "No which series, Star Trek or Star Wars or something else; you fucking geek."
xoebus: I feel loved.
<Indogutsu> Oh, funny thing I saw at Publix a week or two ago. You know those magazines in the checkout line?
<Indogutsu> One of them was a women's magazine with two rather contradictory headlines on the cover: "Party like Paula Deen this Christmas!" and "Lose 20 pounds by the New Year!"
<cmihai> eval 1/1
<evaluator491756> cmihai: 1
<flyingparchment> eval `uname`
<evaluator491756> flyingparchment: AIX
*** [Signoff: evaluator491756 (Remote closed the connection)]
<Tempt> you killed it before I could have fun
<cmihai> This is the first bot I wrote, mkey? :P
<e^ipi> massivesecurityholebot 0.1 ?