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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..219220221222223224225..596Next> |
#35085 (496/676) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rjx> my mom wrote out her shopping list and stuck it on the door
<Rjx> and my older brother in identical handwriting wrote "buy magnets" at the bottom
<Rjx> and now she's confused because she can't remember why she wanted to buy magnets |
#35084 (155/435) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<mafiaboy> it's better to be black than gay cuz when you're black you don't have to tell your mother |
#35083 (301/533) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<minion> what should i get for lunch
<minion> i have $4
<keef> 8 packs of ramen and a 3 dollar hooker |
#35080 (462/652) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Lewko> Do you want to have lunch?
<BenK> Sure. What did you feel like eating?
<Lewko> Anything, as long as it used to frolic in a meadow!
<BenK> Hippies? |
#35071 (375/553) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<jayce[hoopsking]> its always weird encountering people still using dialup
<jayce[hoopsking]> its like meeting someone who still churns their own butter |
#35070 (149/407) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<splice> this conversation is like teaching retards to do calculus |
#35067 (272/472) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Josh> I swear somebody needs to write a virus that does nothing malicious except replace every attachment you recieve with hello.jpg.
<Josh> It would thus rapidly condition every Windows user to never, ever again open an attachement. |
#35046 (392/670) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<railed> overheard at a 13-year old's slumber party: "I WOULD NEVERRRR PUT ONE IN MY MOUTH!! THAT IS SOOOO GROSS!! EWWW!" 3 years later: "hmph rrph mmmph you love me right? hurf mmmph"Comment: #quakeed
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#35042 (217/395) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@penisbird> people at my school have a very annoying habit of puttin shit all over the cars in the parking lot
<@penisbird> like ribbons or fliers
<@penisbird> they tie ribbons to your antenna and they're impossible to take off w/o some sorta knife
<@penisbird> I should bring my UPS and connect the HOT wire to my car antenna |
#35041 (221/395) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nerd> I want a fucking irssi session :/
<zero> i want a girl
<nerd> trade? :D |
#35023 (285/503) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BlooDMooN> ok, what's a petabyte?
<snoozie> a byte that's devoted to eradicating cruelty to animals |
#35020 (265/487) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<TGR> Dipstick: face it, EVERY FUCKING MALE in here would fuck anything if offered it the proper way.
<Zanshin> TGR: I would not fuck green eggs and hamComment: efnet #quake
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#35016 (279/461) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<zaney> how tall is arnald
<zaney> from t2
<zaney> i cant spell his last name
<HomerJ> zaney : can't spell his first name either |
#35012 (246/448) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BigImp> speaking of breakfast, i think i'm gonna order some healthy kfc
<girlmecha> let me guess, the fried chicken goes well with your bulging muscles
<BigImp> there's a good way to reply to that
<BigImp> but i can't think of it right now, please try again in an hour |
#35000 (284/446) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<HowlinMadMurphy> And.. AcidRain.. Man, life's pretty sad when all your good memories are of the internet.
<znutar> hahaha
<NOOU|Sleep> Not really.
<NOOU|Sleep> Almost all my memories are on the internet.
<NOOU|Sleep> ...
<NOOU|Sleep> Holy fuck that's depressing.Comment: Discussing old times.
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#34999 (304/504) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Zuwadza> Ha
<Zuwadza> Apparently a young girl in Jackie Chan's fan club killed herself when she found out he was married
<Zutroy> not a big fan if she didn't know that
<Zutroy> poseurComment: Err, no comment.
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#34997 (261/479) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<avorax> Homeland Security™, 9/11™, and September 11™ are all registered trademarks of the Republican National Committee. All rights reserved. |
#34996 (-3/263) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Lucidia> you have to have the tell tale brown vertical line of masculinity...along with the even more telling yellow circle of strength......on your undies...worn as badges of honor..before you can call yourself a real man |
#34993 (308/508) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<SisterJessica> there is no tree or leaf worth crying about
<infinite_monkey> SisterJessica - Where do you think oxygen comes from?
<SisterJessica> infinite_monkey the air, thanks. |
#34992 (240/466) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bolwerk> You know what's so great about the advance of WiFi internet? There used to be Internet pornography around you going through the wires all the time. Now the Internet pornography is literally being transmitted through you. George W. Bush must love the thought that binary data representing people fencing each other with their cocks is passing right through him all the time now. |
#34987 (186/388) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DerrickL> heh
<DerrickL> so im dumbass
<DerrickL> "this oven doesnt seem very hot...lets see if this pan im cooking my steak on got hot |
#34984 (164/430) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* patb is now known as ChamServ
* ChamServ has joined #gamesurge
<ChamServ> Hello, I am ChamServ, a new GameSurge Service. Please send me your auth handle and password to prevent you account from being trimmed from the database. Thank-you.
* ChamServ Quit (G-lined (you are being reported to your isp.))
]Comment: 31337 |-|4><
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#34981 (85/381) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Topper always thought "concentration camp" sounded amusing. A load of Jews all sat thinking really hard about something |
#34975 (-3/461) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<timmo> man
<timmo> not only did my dog puke in the house
<timmo> but the dog also SHIT in the house
<kisama> haha he made banana split |
#34962 (232/478) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Lazesharp> OMG when did bash change to www.phrise.com!???
<TeddyBear> apparently since you went there last..
<Lazesharp> ...
<Lazesharp> damn your bulletproof logic |
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