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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..122123124125126127128..596Next> |
#61333 (303/551) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
JakManga: hey - you're still awake! can i ask you a quick question?
moonraven: You just did!
JakManga: oh and hello how rude of me...
moonraven: Hola!
JakManga: oh damn.... do i get more than one question?
moonraven: Apparently you get 2 |
#62583 (0/452) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<sp3a> Quoting James from Facebook <comment-info-rt@facebook.com>:
<sp3a> > Hi,
<sp3a> >
<sp3a> > Unfortunately you will not be allowed back on our site. Thank you for
<sp3a> > contacting Facebook!
<sp3a> > |
#61310 (393/515) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< niteshad> Every so often, a van from Corporate will pull up and drop off a load of gear that's surplus, overstock and returns.
< niteshad> Can't be sold as new so they give it to the employees.
< paul> hah
< niteshad> The only caveat is that they don't want to see us selling it on ebay, etc.
< niteshad> However, giving it to friends is perfectly acceptable in Corporate's eyes.
< paul> can you give it away in exchange for sexual favors?
< niteshad> They didn't say anything explicitly forbidding that so, I assume the answer is yes.
< paul> awesome
< paul> well...
< niteshad> That said, paul, in your case, the answer is no. |
#61302 (286/496) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Delphy> heh, a man died of dehydration when he became stuck between two water tanks |
#61291 (153/389) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@csqrl> i think when i have my first interview for mykoala
<@csqrl> the first question i'm going to ask
<@csqrl> is do you type on your keyboard or do you dance with your fingers
<@csqrl> just to catch them off guard
<@csqrl> then if they answer that they dance with their fingers
<@csqrl> i'm going to say i was just being silly, that's a stupid answer
<@csqrl> and if they say they type on their keyboard, i'm going to say so do 8th graders in keyboarding class
<@csqrl> the answer i would expect is a completely different response outside of the two choices
<@csqrl> something original, like i swim with my hands over an alphabet oceanComment: #geekissues
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#62602 (141/311) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< nippleboy> you really got that "cool chat girl that doesn't get hung-up on the same stupid crap as everyone else" down pat!
< nippleboy> <--- impressed!
< heathyr> it goes straight along with hardly paying attention |
#62493 (18/332) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<misterx> Want a pic?
<NoelCower> No.
<NoelCower> Unless it's a dickgirl
<NoelCower> And then only if she has two dicksComment: #blitzcoder - irc.blitzed.org
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#62385 (132/348) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<lemur> wow
<burgizzly> what?
<lemur> i just lamed myself out real baaad
<burgizzly> wqhy
<lemur> well you know how after you jerk off, you can't really pee straight?
<burgizzly> of course...
<lemur> yeah well that was happening to me, only i couldnt remember last time i'd jacked off.
<lemur> it was driving me fuckin nuts trying to work out when i could possibly have pleased myself.
<lemur> seriously
<lemur> like an hour later i was still really worried cause i thought i'd contracted some self-pleasuring split personality disorder thing!
<burgizzly> sooo?
<burgizzly> you worked it out?
<lemur> haha yeah i'd had sex like 20 minutes before :/
<burgizzly> fuck you |
#61484 (-2/370) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Stormscape> DARE is retarded
<Stormscape> it made us realise how lame we'd be if we didn't do drugs |
#61270 (168/364) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Chrisid> so where does the hacker community hang out
<sdouble> aol |
#61236 (106/362) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<jre> semitic grrlz = hot
<jre> totally experts at head
<PigsCantFly> not to mention sound financial advice |
#61230 (232/446) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
scanty@SPARC: wtf am i bleeding for, i totally did not cut myself todayt
mmadia: scanty@SPARC , i'm surprised your parents never told you this .... |
#61211 (208/390) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@TheOracle> the top reason I like alcoholic investors, they cant remember if they wrote the check or not so they keep writing more |
#62458 (240/442) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CellularZipper> im gonna 3-way with jessica and maegan tonight
<Soul> take some pictures of them for me
<CellularZipper> ....
<CellularZipper> how do you take pictures over the phone? |
#62304 (274/422) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tybofborg> damn i have a bad feeling about this
<tybofborg> you know that petike went to USA last sunday
<tybofborg> and i knew that he would have to spend a night at JFK airport
<tybofborg> so i sent him a letter
<tybofborg> containing all the keywords i could think about like bomb, jihad, al quaeda, bin laden and so on
<tybofborg> to freak him out when he reads it
<tybofborg> now it's been three days and he still didn't write back :( |
#61856 (156/418) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@ectweak> so
<@ectweak> I ordered a BLT
<@ectweak> and the girl behind the counter goes "do you want everything on it?"
<@ectweak> and I look at her and go "of course! I wouldn't have ordered a BLT if I didn't want bacon, lettuce, or tomato on it"
<@ectweak> and she goes "no, I mean like onions"
<@ectweak> and I stare at her for a few seconds
<@ectweak> and go "if I wanted onions, I'dve ordered a BLOT, not a BLT" |
#61838 (270/452) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hybrid> emacs has a text adventure game in it
<PyroMithrandir> emacs IS a text adventure game |
#61194 (469/609) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<code> i'm not wearing any pants.
<mittens> I've been drinking for almost seven straight hours!
<Syntacs> The last two lines are a recipe for disaster. |
#62515 (329/511) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@kiafaldorius> is it just me or is it cool that 1337 (string) converted to hex becomes 31333337? |
#61191 (559/673) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AwwJeah> I want to fill a super soaker with cheap vodka and spray down other drivers.
<AwwJeah> Then call the police and tell them I think they're driving drunk.
<AwwJeah> Because, seriously, who would believe that story? |
#61180 (3331/3645) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* Joins: redryan_
<Trinexx> ryan! :D
<Trinexx> dude, where you been at?
<redryan_> man, I have no fucking idea. I went outside to get the mail, next thing I know I've got a job and a social life |
#62110 (142/366) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Oyerth> You bastard.
<Oyerth> I don't want your pr0n!
<OBCT> ='(
<Oyerth> I'm sorry.
<Oyerth> I'm sure your pr0n is lovely. |
#61997 (664/774) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Vagrant> hey everyone
<Vagrant> I love you all
<Dylan> d'aww
<Vagrant> We may have our differences but in the end I know that you guys are friends for life
<Inkblot> I love you too,stranger?
<Goat> That really means a lot coming from you.
<hambone> thnx Vaggie :)
<Vagrant> fuck
<Vagrant> I was typing on the wrong line
<Vagrant> I wasn't talking to you bastards |
#61139 (131/423) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Saito|SemiHere> HA!
<Saito|SemiHere> I pwned my ex.
<Saito|SemiHere> we were snuggling and I leaned over like I was going to kiss him and said "Kthxbye." |
#62402 (218/426) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Spfamg24BIG: Can you get blind from looking at pictures of solar eclipses? |
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