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#92673 (206/608) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Sanguini> I'm pretty sure I didn't just piss on my dog
<Sanguini> Seriously, I just took her out, waited for her to piss, pissed in another direction, and she WALKED AROUND IN FRONT OF ME underneath my urine spray, but I didn't hear it stop hitting the ground, and she feels dry
<Sanguini> Idiot dog |
#92436 (233/607) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Nyschashi-Seikun> so yeah, I downloaded this random porno
<Nyschashi-Seikun> and it's a black porn movie
<Nyschashi-Seikun> and out of nowhere
<Nyschashi-Seikun> they start rapping
<Nyschashi-Seikun> and this skinny white guy, who is apparently the producer
<Nyschashi-Seikun> pops on screen with them
<Nyschashi-Seikun> and dances as they rap
<Nyschashi-Seikun> ;/ |
#92169 (405/677) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Vergo> man...
<Vergo> back in the old days... we had smarter idiots... |
#79226 (117/581) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Ishi> This sucks.
<Ishi> I started seeing a doctor a few months ago. Apparently I have an anxiety order and severe depression.
<Ishi> I've been on 8 or so drugs for depression and anxiety, right?
<Ishi> And its either hit or miss
<Ishi> And the miss usually involves me violently throwing up 8 times in one day
<JediKirby> From the drugs or because you're fat?
* JediKirby was kicked by Ishi (Learn to not be a wanker)Comment: irc.zirc.org #Massassi
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#91398 (173/507) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<MonopolyMan> Taft was the last American president to have had facial hair (in this case, a moustache), as of 2007.
*** MonopolyMan sets the channel topic to "BRING BACK THE PRESIDENTIAL MOUSTACHE".
<Legion> lol
<Legion> That's awesome
<Legion> I can't even tell you one fact about Taft
<Legion> Other than what you just said
<MonopolyMan> i only remember he got stuck in the bathtub alot
<MonopolyMan> so they made a really big one
<||bass> i know a fat about taft
<||bass> *fact
<||bass> shit
<||bass> i gave the fact away tooComment: #nobodysworld on deltaanime
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#90304 (2280/3012) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Jigsy> [10:37:19] <OD_Jonno> even the adults over 18 are soon to be limited to smoking in their houses
<@Jigsy> Unless a burglar breaks in.
<@Jigsy> Then it becomes his workplace. |
#80277 (175/511) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@nakor> baseball bats remind me of hentai
<@Akamu> ...
<@Akamu> I'm curious on the relation there.
< Syntacs> Once while playing baseball he slid into first (dude, you can keep running, but whatever), and it kind of scraped up his knee, which reminded him of a time as a kid when he idly used an eyedropper to make little suction marks on his legs and the other kids made fun of him the next day, which reminded him of the little suction things on octopus tentacles, and well, the train of thought is obvious from that point. |
#78379 (8/520) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+commodore_dude> BalefireX
<+commodore_dude> i dunno wtf happened
<+commodore_dude> but my mom heard some thing on the radio about how the elise is gonna be highly collectable in 10-15 years
<+commodore_dude> so now she's bugging my dad to get one
<@BalefireX_> you know, commodore_dude
<@BalefireX_> it kinda sounds like your parents are pretty cool
<+commodore_dude> har
<+commodore_dude> yeah
<+commodore_dude> they're awesome
<@BalefireX_> they must be so disappoined
<+commodore_dude> :DComment: #gideontech
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#90649 (523/695) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<X> i want like
<X> a vagina for a week
<%Growly> Me too
<%Growly> Not on me
<%Growly> but access to one
<X> i'd want one on me
<X> just to see how it feels
<X> (AND USE IT TO STORE COINS AND VARIOUS ITEMS)
<%Growly> I'd call you creepy if I hadn't had that thought myself |
#89351 (279/565) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<TrevorParscal> when she turns 3.14159265 we are throwing her a PI birthday party... |
#89114 (73/369) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
daftpunk988: Bah, Im gonna hate going to college
daftpunk988: Hell, I still dont know exactly how college and university works yet
daftpunk988: Like majors and minors, what the hell does that mean?
LuminousIce: Major is just your primary field of study... the classes you take, the subject you focus on, etc. It's like choosing what you hated least in high school as something you get more of. Minors are the supplement to that... Like the smaller, less imposing crony that helps out the big scary mother fucker. |
#77357 (401/635) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<CPOK> so when are you americans gonna catch up with the rest of the world and use metric anyway?
<Molgorn> I'll drink to that!
<Molgorn> Anyone fancy a pint? |
#88844 (263/483) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Slowking_Man> Ugh, I'm dealing with a site that apparently uses javascript to load flash to load WMV files
<Slowking_Man> It's like something out of Richard Stallman's nightmaresComment: #defocus@irc.freenode.net
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#88639 (265/491) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Apollo> lmao, that reminds me of when ryan had the INCREDIBLE plan to submit a quote to bash. The gimmick was that each time it was rejected, he'd add another line and resubmit it until it was accepted XD
<Trinexx> how did that turn out?
<red_ryan> well, its been over a year and they still havent moderated the third attempt. |
#85843 (395/647) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Meglo> This reminds of back when I played Star Wars Galaxies. I killed some guy so many times he sent me a tell that he was going to kill himself and it was all my fault. Thats the only time I feel I have ever "won" at an MMO.Comment: #synthetic-geeks
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#85592 (577/781) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Apo[Herpes] is now known as Apo[Heroes]
<+Apo[Heroes]> WHY DIDN'T ANY TELL ME IT SAID HERPES?!!!
<+xpCynic> it looked intentional...
<+Apo[Heroes]> it wasn'tComment: irc.esper.net #rohmacking
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#81483 (255/591) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Trinexx> I DONT GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO DO!
<Trinexx> If I catch you with your dick in my vaccuum cleaner one more time, I'm gonna kick the shit out of you. Are we clear? |
#80422 (178/426) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
NatNic1: HALLELUJAH!
NatNic1: or however you do the letters in that word thing
F 7 Y: rofl what
NatNic1: ya know
NatNic1: whats it called
NatNic1: oh
NatNic1: spelling |
#80041 (435/677) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[xexyz] Help me dave. I have a 17 year old girl chasing me.
[davek] Congrats, xex
[xexyz] :p Need a little more help than that
[xexyz] Wait.. 17 is legal here in Texas..
<xexyz goes AFK> |
#79912 (180/424) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
dalener: hey at least when i move my room it'll be sound free of most people and have a big bed
dalener: then my plan to fuck someone will be complete
Mrs_Grima_Wormtongue: no
Mrs_Grima_Wormtongue: you still need the person
jack_burton84: goddamnit |
#78733 (557/793) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*Dravas has quit IRC
<Caprisun> im gonna take a video of me fucking that girl he likes
<PS31791> O_O
<PS31791> that would suck
<PS31791> if i saw that
<PS31791> id be like
*Takumi has joined #main
<PS31791> from now on im gonna be gay
<PS31791> ...
<PS31791> Takumi... i can explain...
<Caprisun> XD |
#81446 (2627/3073) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
ATH0: I don't know why the Korean guys at school love Steve so much.
ATH0: He doesn't look too Korean.
Batman: He told me.
Batman: Basically, he beat them at StarCraft and became their king. |
#80426 (565/799) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Zipper: wtf
Zipper: i'm too fuckin tired to be legally allowed to be awake
Zipper: i just pressed Windows+L to logoff
Zipper: and upon seeing the logon screen
Zipper: i typed my password to log back in.
Zipper: why?
Zipper: i have no fucking clue... |
#82268 (211/383) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Syanda> also, the p key on my laptop just came out =(
<%Slagg> :(
<+Turks> who uses the p key anyway? :P
<+Turks> oh wait |
#88403 (578/760) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<[ka]killer> what if you just took all the servers on the internet and networked them all together....
<[ka]killer> wait...
<[ka]killer> never mind. |
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