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#7214 (73/274) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Viper550esp> heh hell, you have no idea what hell is! Try standing inbetween two large fat women at a manson concert who decided just to wear the bare minimum to get it in concert.    Oh thats nothing, they decided that it would be fun to start a mash pit. I kid you not those two women took out 7 people with one massive shove
#3634 (73/239) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<tyne> my life consists of 2 things
<tyne> music
<tyne> and debt
#51 (73/433) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<UncleJed> the government should split up efnet
<UncleJed> not that efnet doesn't split enough as it is
#304949 (73/119) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<dd7> lol i went to a furry role-playing chat once
<dd7> an op hushed me because two lesbians were going at it
<dd7> so i said "type 1 if you're getting off on this"
<dd7> and the entire channel was flooded with numbers
#42057 (73/155) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Celestar> I almost got trapped yesterday
<Celestar> in a fucking car park
<Celestar> I was just paying, and suddenly the only gate began to close
<Celestar> so I ran up and found a photo sensor
<Celestar> luckily I always have duct tape in my bag
<Celestar> so I patched the light barrier with duct tape
<Celestar> to get my car
<GeniusDex> lol good work Celestar :P
#21583 (73/265) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<MikeSee> what OS does windows run on?
#336 (73/317) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<nullgod> I'm not quite sure who slack is for, it's harder then REdHat, so it's not for newbies, it's less secure then FreeBSD so it's not for experts, and it's not pretty so it's not for desktops.
<DigDug> slack is for linux zealots :-D
#6225 (73/240) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<AffenJunge> I don't want to dominate women.. I just wish they'd be more eager to dominate me
#31840 (73/315) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<jestuh> you know what we don't have enough of?
<jestuh> NORWEGIAN PROGRAMMING QUOTES!
<jestuh> <[Stig]> men er jo lett � se en feil, om det er!
<jestuh> <ZoraX> men pr�v "$fp=fopen("linker.txt", "wr");"
<|Chris> wow that's a hilarious quote
<livewireo> APPROVE
<|Chris> definately approve
<|Chris> that's quality
<Infinik> Yes.
<kitchen> i don't get it.
<Infinik> That's cause you have no sense of... something.
#15713 (73/220) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<{Mantis}> we had an interesting conversation once while we were both doing
nitrous balloons...
<{Mantis}> pure...pharamsuetical grade nitrous I might add
<{Mantis}> we were in the middle of this awesome conversation and then we both
looked up and here walking up to us....was this naked woman who was painted
from head to toe as a cheetah...
<{Mantis}> with wiskers and all...I thought I was hallucinating...and then she
walked up to me...and reached out and said...."can I have some of your
ballooon"
<{Mantis}> I was so startled I let it go......and it went zinnning around,....
<{Mantis}> she went damn.........now I'll have to blow and another one...
#1906 (73/262) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
(|Chris) CNN (Las Vegas, NV) New York has NOT been bombed. David Copperfield has come forward and stated that, "It was all just mirrors. I'm sorry that it got out of hand. This was just a publicity stunt that went horribly wrong."
#1654 (73/253) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Mr Brown> ill snip ur ass
<JD> I'll carry that flag so good, you won't know what hit ya
<JD> Wait, that didn't sound very threatening...
#267642 (73/137) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Rowan> [link to image of girl]
<Rowan> that be her
<art0rz> i would hit it
<Rowan> you'd hit anything that moves
<Rowan> or probably preferably, can't move
#297086 (73/239) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
< leth> gnufs: but that is already perfect, why would you need to change it?
< gnufs> leth: free software is not about perfection but satisfying your ego by modifying stuff for no reason
Comment: #gnewsense on Freenode
#1667 (73/249) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
(iSONEWS) [iSONEWS] Update in DivX: My Life *CLASSIC* released by MEDiAMANiACS (49 files, 08/12/2001) www.isonews.com/r/?155D256CD=
(`Thunder) whoa
(`Thunder) they released my life
(`Thunder) how did they tape all that?!
(madman`) no way!! stop lying! it's MY LIFE!!
(runner-) either way its gonna be boring
#310413 (73/79) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
(aaaaaaaaa) I know people at work that actually store files in the recycle bin. As in, they store files they plan to use in the future there. IT had to stop deleting files from it because of people's work was getting lost and had to be restored from the backups.
#204687 (73/145) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<VirtualHost> I fucking hate when homeless people stand around where cars are lined up, like left turn lanes and drive throughs
<Nurple> homeless people hate it when you stand around in your home
#1681 (73/218) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<_|LoCo|> any1 know whats the last album of paul oakenfold?
<al-x> Paul Oakenfold Presents Another Shitty ALbum With All The Same Tracks As the Last 3 Albums
#297618 (73/105) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@Elleo> we should invent a dance called the Mersenne Twist
<@Elleo> where you just move about randomly
<@Elleo> but with an even distribution
#4243 (73/243) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Kir> if i had a better body, and clearer skin, i'd be a snobby bitch
#5275 (73/221) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<zymurgy> #define NULL NULL /* because I can dammit! */
#310941 (73/83) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Chillum: the most evil thing I have ever made is a tiny USB stick that when inserted in a computer pretends to be a keyboard and turns on/off CAPS LOCK every minute or so randomly
Chillum: it drives people insane
dmacks_away: Luckily I have a case-insensitive filesystem and a shell that is so crappy it doesn't even realize when a command is miscapitalized.
legoktm: you use PHP as your shell?
#28318 (73/249) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<spiregrain> the worst thing about irc is that delay between finding the server, and getting logged in.  Why does it happen?  What can I do?
<spiregrain> the second worst thing is dumb questions like the above
#24239 (73/261) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<TO> ppl think im gay when they first meat me sometimes
#311220 (73/77) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<thebananaking> I'm sick and my cat died :(
<thebananaking> kidney stone, blocked bladder, no symptoms until too late
<thebananaking> he was a terrible cat, had no idea how to cat
<thebananaking> but I'll miss the little fucker
<thebananaking> there was a communications stuffup at the vet, and I got a followup call the next day to see how he was doing
<thebananaking> I couldn't help myself and said "well, he's not doing much..."
<thebananaking> I don't think I've ever heard anyone blush before
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