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#28664 (75/271) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Sight^> crap
<Sight^> I just got a D in spanish today
<Sight^> ever since I gave up drugs my spanish grades has been only D's and E's
#308993 (75/101) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<PL> you really dont need pickup lines in Finland
<PL> It was really romantic how i met my wife
<PL> i found her puking at my bathroom (we had my friends 20yo party here)
<PL> that was love at first sight <3
#50435 (76/252) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Panther: Play Civ4 until my eyes bleed.
Panther: Then wash them out and play some more.
Xeno: ...
Xeno: =( damn all I'm gonna do is have tons of sex eat pizza and watch anime..
Panther: X.x
Panther: You win.
Xeno: ::bow::
#2820 (76/239) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Lord-Data] hell, woudlnt mind a girlfriend
[Duckarse] ditto
[incorrect] there's always ebay
#19205 (76/256) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<MafiaItaliana> do you remember the first time you got head?
<chrystopher2001> Yeah...
<MafiaItaliana> how long did it take for him to cum?
<chrystopher2001> shit...i lasted a long time
<MafiaItaliana> bet your mouth got tired eh?
<chrystopher2001> huh? wait a minute...
#1543 (76/260) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Amanda> I remember being in Europe
<Amanda> and I'd call shaft from payphones to ask if we'd gotten the channel back yet
#24078 (76/216) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<whitcomb> i somehow get the feeling that listening to the cure and looking at porn is very, very wrong
#26385 (76/214) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
([m1]) so there i was, at the porcelain boardroom, initiating another
"round of layoffs"
([m1]) and the laptop battery warning popped up
([m1]) never wiped and washed so fast
([m1]) the things i do to keep from losing a network connection
#44065 (76/220) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<sirveaux> so here is my take on just one aspect of intarweb politics:  AOLers
<sirveaux> (AOLer) The other day, a I and a chum of mine were in the middle of an intellectual debate pertaining to the German spelling reform of 1996 and its ramifications when--
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer) omg dude r u liek an AOHELLER?/
<sirveaux> (AOLer) Why, yes I am, and--
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer) omg lolollol
<sirveaux> AOLer was kicked by nonAOLer (leik omg aohel si 4 faggerts)
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer2) rofflekopter
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer) lest go fap to screnns of linix
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer2) well lemme grab sum lube, wud u
#2084 (76/231) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Sharkey> When you talk to your cactus at the end of the quest he says "He got hard?"
<kill> at least you wouldn't have to water a cactus
<kill> it's pretty low-maintenance, if you got one
<Starchild> That's my ideal adopted kid. One you don't have to water or feed.
<kill> you just have to cloth it
<DigiGnome> And you don't even have to do that, as long as you don't let it out of its room.
#20268 (75/290) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bloodshedder> torn's feeble mind cannot understand what we are saying
<ph`> I agree with torn
#54830 (76/300) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DesScorp> mmmmm
<DesScorp> chinese food
<DesScorp> don't know what I ate
<DesScorp> but it was good
<DesScorp> buffet!
<DesScorp> 83 different items!
<DesScorp> (82 of them probably some form of chicken)
<DesScorp> (I hope)
<KArmA> cooked cat looks remarkably like chicken
<DesScorp> so
<DesScorp> I can say I ate pussy then
<KArmA> you ate dead pussy
<KArmA> in a thick, gravy-like sauce
#3887 (75/266) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<KNG_SNK> ok i was at work today
<KNG_SNK> and two ppl were missing...
<KNG_SNK> and this guy's office was locked
<KNG_SNK> but i knew there was someone in there... VERY quiet too
<KNG_SNK> so me and some buds went over to the next building
<KNG_SNK> to try to peek in
<KNG_SNK> and man... they were goin at it
<KNG_SNK> but we could clearly see humping action
#18741 (76/245) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bludshed> dang
<Bludshed> my eyes hurt today
<Bludshed> ive never had to sit at the computer with my sunglasses on
<Bludshed> before now...
#4170 (76/290) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<morte> Jesus Peanut Butter Cups: Little pieces of the Son of God in a milk chocolate cup! There's no wrong way to eat a Jesus!
#307789 (76/132) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Navi> I googled 5 a day and it suggested "5.79 x 10^-5 Hz"
#311122 (76/102) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kit> Is anyone around who has my nude pics who can forward them to someone?
#2899 (76/262) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** hypr changes topic to '.'
<LkChaCha1> Ahh. . .hypr had his period. Must be that time of month.
#3681 (76/256) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<rivvah> dude, he's from montana or some shit. 17.50 would buy a new house
<Ouroboros> What's a house?
#14448 (76/223) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@harb> Andy: 01:16 < Danelope> http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view.php?id=30319
<@kitten> JESUS FUCK
<@harb> Oh yeah.
<@harb> Andy uses IE.
<@harb> Sorry about that.
< Danelope> Hahaha.
< Danelope> IE is for cocksksksk.
<@harb> <cypher> I don't even see the popups anymore.
<@harb> <cypher> Just blonde. Brunette. Redhead.
< Danelope> <cypher> Just viagra, penis enlargement, 581% more cum.
#310640 (78/120) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ChauffeR> what's the name of the mission that fucked up because they didn't use meters
<OyajiVyse> America?
#6780 (76/205) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DaScott> I want to be in the @home commercials, when they interview the dorks that use it "I can sure download a ton of porn!"
#14462 (76/224) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Breathe> I hurt my back last week, and it is still hurting. >:(
<SirPrux> Maybe you sprained a muscle
<SirPrux> I sprained a cucumber once
<@Breathe> ...
<SirPrux> man did it hurt
<@Breathe> you sprained a cucumber?
<huzyrdadi> I think he means he sprained his asshole /using/ a cucumber
#259198 (76/152) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<doc|home> hmmm, checking if suspend works by closing the laptop lid is a bit like checking to see if the light in the fridge goes off :/
#4233 (76/276) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<JoeyB> what would be better of a car to modify, a honda accord, or a toyota
<Focus2001> oh man'
<pagan> which is better, dog poop or cat poop?
<pagan> ;p
<coug_> LOL
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