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#298767 (48/120) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<aaron> you know, they once asked Snoop Dogg why he always walked around with an umbrella and he replied "fo drizzle"
<robink> aaron: Interesting.
<aaron> you don't get it, do you?
<pthree> no we all got it
<robink> aaron: It's a play on 'fo shizzle', meaning for sure.  Instead, he said 'fo drizzle', meaning 'because of the rain'.
<pthree> but we'd prefer if you dropped us off for school a block away
#298929 (48/128) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<ehird> erm, presumably two processes have a reason to talk
<ehird> or are you writing "blind date OS"
#299627 (48/208) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<altoid> i remember once talking to someone at the helpdesk at ucsd
<altoid> i mentioned i was having trouble getting GNOME to work on Gentoo (never did solve the problem)
<altoid> (used KDE the entire time instead, out of laziness)
<altoid> and he was like "oh, did you lose your windows CDs or something?
#300740 (48/82) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Brian> Hey hey, want to apply for a job at my work?
<Jeremy> Sure, I guess :) What would they need from me?
<Brian> A resume, cover letter, employment history, maybe urine
<Jeremy> I'm guessing they don't want me to mail that last one in :-D
<Brian> No, the last one is for my personal enjoyment.
#305297 (48/76) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<roverbat> I live near an old nuclear reactor
<roverbat> there's nothing wrong with me
<iva|phone> roverbat, how do you explain your wings then?
<roverbat> they go up and down, iva|phone
#305413 (48/92) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<+Meow> what's the alternative to html tables?
<+slew> html chairs
Comment: irc.p2p-network.net / #zomgwtfbbq
#305654 (48/96) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<IMMJR> Nice knew name |xjojox|
<IMMJR> Don't quite understand what the |'s are for
<|xjojox|> so the x's dont fall off
#306226* (?/102) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Solstace> Seriously?  Who makes a 3 inch dildo?  It just doesn't make sense!
<Tibetanfox> It's Japan. Start 'em young.
<Solstace> ....
<Solstace> That's terrible.
<Tibetanfox> And almost certain to end up on the quotes database.
#307194 (48/82) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<+Becky_> when I was like 10 or something I went on the internet to like a HTML chatroom on yahoo
<+Becky_> some guy had the nickname "blink182fan"
<+Becky_> I said to him that the blink tag sucks because it's not supported by all browsers
#310161 (48/118) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<RHExcelion> You know, when I Was a kid, playing oregon trail
<RHExcelion> I'd shoot the damn tumbleweed
<RHExcelion> And wonder why I never got any meat
<Edward_Bebop> you thought the tumbleweed was an animal???
#311005 (48/94) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Analogy> So I just got an audio book, but it was in another language so I had to listen with subtitles
#311127 (48/70) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<danh> some super creepy dude has sat down at my table
<danh> im about to get stabbed
<l0de> are you at a coffee shop
<danh> yeah
<danh> 20 tables free... chose me!
<danh> he's not wearing any underwear
<danh> dont ask me how i know
#311620 (48/58) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<dysk> "Target is bleeping out book descriptions, removing words like 'Nazis' and 'queer'"
<YelseyKing> lol
<YelseyKing> I love overzealous auto-censors.
<dysk> That old joke about **** van **** just continues to stay relevant, doesn't it.
<YelseyKing> Yes.
<YelseyKing> Penis van Lesbian.
<dysk> Except in Target's case, "penis" and "lesbian" would be censored.
<dysk> I mean, one of the censored words was "stripper".
<dysk> Which isn't always about nude performance. Sometimes it's used for a tool (lol tool) that forestry workers use to remove the bark from wood.
<YelseyKing> t**l
<YelseyKing> I totally understand the reason why sites would do that, given that anyone who'd be so easily offended by certain words would be the same ones to throw a huge fit over seeing them.
<YelseyKing> But it doesn't make it any less stupid.
<YelseyKing> My favorite thing is when they censor a word with only a single asterisk. F*ck!
<YelseyKing> Like you can't tell what that says.
<dysk> "Holy sh*t!"
<dysk> And, of course, let's not forget ***an.
<Danika> Satan?
<dysk> (a certain country in East Asia)
<Danika> oh, Japan
<YelseyKing> The best censors are the ones that ignore spaces and punctuation, so you'll get words you didn't even type censored.
<YelseyKing> Like "cut it out" will be censored, because it ignores the space and sees "tit".
<dysk> Or "It's been 20 years since the release of Mariah Carey's hit", and the final four letters would be censored.
<YelseyKing> Yup.
<YelseyKing> Even better is if they're not censored, but replaced.
<YelseyKing> "It's been 20 years since the release of Mariah Carey'fecal matter"
#1273 (49/227) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Fakester> hmm, I wonder if Wal-Mart would ask for ID on a return...
<Fakester> that could be a problem
<Tortri> if they do, well... tell them you forgot it, take the DC back home
<Tortri> then you'll be stuck with a new dc
<Fakester> Tortri: I'm currently unemployed, I don't have $100 to waste like that.
<Tsengie> sell it to some stupid kid for 119
<Tsengie> tell him it's a ps2
#1351 (49/325) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<slyfox> lol
<slyfox> dude! I typed "lol" with my head!!!
#1622 (49/257) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<YehhNO> how i download irc?
#2446 (49/238) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
*** blahblahb (Dingdong@h24-207-55-238.dlt.dccnet.com) has joined #gamedev
<blahblahb> !list
*** blahblahb (Dingdong@h24-207-55-238.dlt.dccnet.com) has left #gamedev
<DAL9000> it was a driveby !list'ing
#3283 (49/221) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<JibberJim> Your bios doesn't like your 5 1/4" drive roded?
<roded> vmware doesn't actaully
<Jumper_> yeah, downgrade to the 8" again
* Jumper_ had a dual 8" drive - rocked
<JibberJim> 8" is a downgrade? - man you must be liked by the ladies.
#3552 (49/244) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<DAL9000> he prolly cried and then shot himself in the head 14 times
<Wronski> DAL9000: I think it would be rather difficult to shoot yourself in the head 14 times.
<DAL9000> Wronski: think about it.
<DAL9000> if he's stupid enough to use an imac and need help
<DAL9000> then he's prolly not using very much of his brain
<natescape> b'sides, they say we only use 10% of our brain most of the time anyway
<natescape> his 10% was probably located closer to his ass....
#3561 (49/273) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<mightyflo> they need to make a car washing sim
<nitrifik_> I'd play it.
<FE2work> what r u a spic ?
<blazemore> haha
<blazemore> would you like to buy a vowel?
<blazemore> or even a whole word
#4445 (49/250) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<K0ffing> you should Photoshop Raz ... I'll give you a dollar if you can make his face look less like a butt
#4858 (49/258) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Puff-working> I play the banjo..never learned fiddle..but I might someday.
<Puff-working> and I can make a harmonica sing.
<Unfor|Work> I play the CD player
#5823 (49/222) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<mendel> now that I think of it, O'Reilly is to a system administrator
<mendel> as a shoulder length latex glove is to a vetinarian.
#6270 (49/237) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<pipedream> one time i pee'd on the mcdonalds restroom floor
<pipedream> but it was a "statement"
#6850 (49/282) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@unlord> yah I've gotten good at typing in the past few dasy
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