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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..549550551552553554555..596Next> |
#299953 (50/70) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
bubbal: Why would you want to stay married to someone who doesn't want to be married to you?
overbored454: because you just can't turn love off like a car engine?
FlyingUndeadSheep: but you can handbrake-turn it sideways into a wall. |
#300468 (50/226) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<me__> i have a dumpdev and can get a backtrace. anything else i should grab?
<arachnist> tits of a nearby female |
#302214* (?/82) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@CaptainJistuce> I've noticed several J covers are very minimal and subdued while the US covers are an explosion of color.
<Drakkar> thats because americans have ADHD
<Drakkar> also AD&D
<@CaptainJistuce> AD&HD? That could be the most disastrous tabletop game ev- oooh, shiny! |
#304215 (50/106) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Juliet|Awesome> going to "bed" so I can "read" a "book", maybe "learn" a little more "esperanto"
* Juliet|Awesome is now known as Juliet|pr0n
* Juliet|pr0n is now known as Juliet|Zzzzzzzzz
<PovAddict> o_O
<Juliet|Zzzzzzzzz> stupid dvorakComment: freenode #stackoverflow
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#304549* (?/74) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Mgsts> I'm actually reading the Browne Review
<@nukespoon> is it brown
<Mgsts> the introduction actually is
<Mgsts> brown background
<@Al> they probably thought they were being funny
<@nwagers> yeah, british often think they're funny
<@nwagers> we call it "British Humor" in the US
<@pmMike> we call you cunts |
#304575 (50/100) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[convo about airport security]
<paul> myself, did you get body scanned or groped
<myself> I walked through gates but didn't step into the federal dick-measurer
<myself> good thing, too; I don't know what maxint is on those things |
#304645 (50/126) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<PhoneBizarre> Atheist motherfuckah in the hizzouse REPRESENT!
<Reyendo> < atheist 2
<PhoneBizarre> PREACH IT MAH BROTHA
<PhoneBizarre> RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW!
<Reyendo> AMEN, BROTHER!
<Reyendo> LET US SING PRAISES TO THE
<Reyendo> FUCK |
#306637 (50/96) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Timmeh> aw man, Lucian Freud died
<crikes> 88 is very old for an artist
<@Digga> unspecified illness
<@Digga> WE ALL KNOW HE SLIPPED |
#307354 (50/98) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
rejoec > africans complain theres no water for 20 miles
rejoec > why dont they walk the 20 miles and live there instead
rejoec > like any fucking sane person |
#308060 (50/72) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<%Chlamydia> my only mobile security feature is my lock pattern.
< me-tan> heh tablet runs windows XP so i use the fingerprint reader on it
< me-tan> best goddamn way to unlock your workstation ever
<%Chlamydia> nice.
< me-tan> not very secure though
<%Chlamydia> especially if someone finds your finger.
< me-tan> Chlamydia: its a laptop. Its covered in fingerprints already
< me-tan> well, laptop/tablet
< me-tan> all you have to do is cast the finger prints in gelatine then swipe them on the reader.
<%Chlamydia> i'd never have thought to do that, lol.
<%Chlamydia> i guess this is my excuse to wear long villain gloves everywhere.
< me-tan> or pick pineappes for a living.
< me-tan> One of the chemicals in pineapples removes the lines in your hands and fingers, so people who process pineapples end up leaving no fingerprints
<%Chlamydia> you are going to be first on my secret agent team.
< me-tan> only if i get a neat catsuit
<%Chlamydia> deal.
< me-tan> sweet.Comment: #wtfux
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#310343 (50/62) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< yates> let me read and then perhaps ask more intelligent questions.
< o11c> pretty sure that's never happened in this channel before ^Comment: freenode ##c++
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#310968 (50/62) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Thugzilla> jesus
<Thugzilla> i just won the hardest battle of real life
<Thugzilla> internet was down all day, so i went upstairs knocked, [Redacted 1] answered and i told him to plug the ethernet cable back in
<Thugzilla> he didnt
<Thugzilla> 2 hours later i knocked again and no one answered, even tho i can hear footsteps
<Thugzilla> i knocked like 20 times still no one answers
<Thugzilla> i flip the breaker for their fridge and living room, go back upstairs, knock again and [Redacted 2] answers within 2 seconds
<Thugzilla> now my internet is back |
#523 (51/281) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
jaylane0910: oh gross
e l i t e m r p: ?
jaylane0910: my cmoputer science teacher corrupted the word g-string for me
e l i t e m r p: heh
jaylane0910: she said she was writing her own string lib
jaylane0910: her name is Gioviana or something
jaylane0910: and she caled it GString
jaylane0910: and shes ugly
jaylane0910: and damn |
#684 (51/315) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<C-B0> i put a toad in the freezer... it peed then froze to the bottem...
then my mom like screamed at me for a week or 2.. it ruled |
#1370 (51/261) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<diz> i remember sticking lightbright pegs in places they shouldn't go on a girl |
#1827 (51/255) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(V_Audax) flip da flop da boing floygan
(d-_-b) v_audax has been possessed by the spirit of cosby~!?~@ |
#2907 (51/297) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Berzerker> hey
<Berzerker> you hear about the new game they play at the white house?
<Berzerker> swallow the leader. |
#3581 (51/241) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Slant> In the process of arguing for chinese food
<Slant> I appear to have slipped my guilt in .. err .. inability to cook food.
<Slant> If it reaches the complexity of boiling water, I don't have the attention span.
<Slant> As such, we have had a few vict.. err .. accidents around the house.
<Slant> So it looks like I'll be eating ramen tonight. Worse, I'll be eating it carefully monitored. |
#4693 (51/222) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*** Quits: Zathras (Evelyn the dog, having undergone further modification pondered the significance of short-person behaviour in pedal depressed, pan-chromatic resonance, and other highly ambient domains. "Arf," she said.) |
#5416 (51/262) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<DrWoody> i do'nt belkivein drinkng |
#7332 (51/230) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<AshiFoo> I just need a life now
<AshiFoo> and a faster 'net connection |
#8297 (51/220) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<BadAndy> leechers wanna stop leeching for a bit?
<frankster|kickme> that's like asking them to stop breathing for a bit |
#8636 (51/191) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<teste_fly> i talk shit, and none of it's true and i'm a skinny pussy who wouldn't harm a turd
<teste_fly> but i will give it a stern talking to |
#9085 (51/259) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<pure_sin> oi!
<pure_sin> i nearly had a heart attack this morning:/
<pure_sin> i thought my computer died on me:~(
<st0w> wow... I'd hate to see what happens when your vibrator batteries die |
#9957 (51/243) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Pr3tent1ous> hey
<Pr3tent1ous> If I pretend I'm female
<Pr3tent1ous> can I be an opper? |
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