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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..321322323324325326327..596Next> |
#297697* (?/31) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Stryyker> That was exciting. My mother tried to do CPR on the neighbour. He's dead. |
#297727* (?/31) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nyschashi-Seikun> The penis is not an acceptable cork to prevent anal leakage |
#297784 (5/261) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Alice> what's the most turned-on you guys have ever been?
<Bob> first time i seen my current girlfriend naked.. handjob, blowjob and titjob.. god damn.
<Carlos> Bob: you mean you jerked off her tit? does that even feel good for girls? |
#297820* (?/29) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<LuminolBlue> fahadsadah: Please be quiet. There is no reason for you to provoke anyone to start an argument over something so trivial.
<fahadsadah> What's so trivial?
<fahadsadah> I started it over nothing... |
#297886* (?/31) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<&Alternaria> I watched the entire set of movies witht he kids
<&angel> fell asleep trying to read it...many times
<LoneEagle> yeah, I've only been able to do The Hobbit once
<LoneEagle> reading, that is
<&Alternaria> you do hobbits?
<&angel> really LoneEagle?
<&angel> since when?
<&angel> and...most important
<&angel> how do you find them?
<LoneEagle> I MEAN....reading it!
<&Alternaria> they are like leprechauns...
<Trudgemank> it would have to be a hot hobbit-ette for me though
<&angel> such huge ugly feet
* LoneEagle was never NEAR them hobbits!
<Chewbca> do the hobbit.. jesus christ. what did I walk back in on?
<&angel> sureeeeeeeeeeee uh huh
<Trudgemank> otherwise the hairy feet would be a total Deal-breaker |
#297891* (?/39) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+Jerry> YOU HAVE 1 MINUTE TO PART THE CHANNEL, GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!
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* Lukas (~lukas|irp@hat.eine.tolle.vhost) has joined #DontJoinItsATrapComment: #DontJoinItsATrap in Rizon. There's a script which keeps you in the channel and sometimes it lets you go out. This was faked.
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#297892* (?/23) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Mike: (rm itself will disappear if you rm -Rf /bin)
Mike: i have experience with both building and destroying linux systems. :)
Mike: hehe. that would be fun to see on a resume
Mike: "expert system destroyer"
Mike: "skilled in use of dd if=/dev/zero and rm -Rf" |
#297907* (?/31) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<meister> Hm.
<meister> My fortune cookie says
<meister> your mentality is alert and practical
<meister> I have the house to myself, and a hard drive full of unwatched porn
<meister> I am alert, indeed
<meister> though I doubt it is that practical
<Cric> What I wanna know
<Cric> How the fuck is that a fortune?
<meister> Clearly, 'I see many boobs in your future' got old |
#297914* (?/35) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Foone> if you have a product named "SHE5290", YOU CAN CHANGE THE NUMBERS
<Foone> I've bought the "Philips SHE5920 Virtual Surround Sound In-Ear Headphones" three times
<Foone> well, bought it twice and was given it as a christmas present once
<Foone> and it's never been the same product
<Foone> the second model switched from a right angle to a straight plug, and the new one has a big hunk of plastic at the Y join
<Foone> CALL IT PHILIPS SHE5921
<Shin-LaC> they don't want to lose all the brand recognition!
<Foone> THEY COULD SELL IT AS NEW AND IMPROVED
<Shin-LaC> SHE5920 has become a household name in American households all across America
<Foone> AS IT SHOULD BE |
#297948* (?/23) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+||bass> this is why i like talking about africa
<+||bass> i feel like one of the people in zeal, except there's no lavos |
#299619* (?/25) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nex> Alpha Proximo is 4.2 light years from Earth
<nex> the Milky Way is 100,000 ly in diameter
<nex> and 1000 ly thick on avg
<BizB> Mmmmm girth
<nex> a typical galaxy is only 30,000 ly across
<nex> we got length too, baby
<nex> that's like a 15 inch cock
<nex> the Milky Way: the 15" cock of galaxies
<BizB> Rule 34!?Comment: #hn
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#299645* (?/37) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Cerise> fin is a fstream?
<fow> er, maybe not
<fow> yes |
#299676* (?/27) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Stormgren> Goddamn, I'd forgotten how good bass-heavy Bach organ compositions sound on BIG speakers
<kadiera> pipe organs need big speakers
<Stormgren> Pipe organs generally need cathedrals
<Stormgren> :P
<melstav> I got your pipe organ right here. |
#299737* (?/31) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
functionifelse: public_html 94208 bytes
functionifelse: My site is small
functionifelse: Don't let that fool you though. I'm hung like a 408.Comment: HTTP codes
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#299761* (?/17) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
dors-andrey-viagra1.txt;3;10Comment: dors-andrey-viagra1.txt;3;10
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#299833* (?/37) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Thug-life> _^_ i thought you would of given up on the internet now
<Thug-life> knowing that seand is the only person to accept you
<Thug-life> and, irl.. don't get me started
<_^_> Thug-life: I do not give up on the internet. The internet gives up on me.
<seand> hey now, all you need is one friend
<_^_> fuck off seand
<seand> don't listen to him bu-
<Thug-life> lol
<seand> fag.
<_^_> I couldn't resist
<seand> no, fuck you
<_^_> in the same situation, you wouldn't have been able to either
<_^_> admit that much
<seand> you know what bu- is?
<Thug-life> You have really bad people skills _^_
<seand> IT'S ME SAYING BUDDY EXCEPT I DIDN'T GET TO FINISH |
#299838* (?/31) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(23:53:38) Beyecixramd: oh rly?
(23:53:39) AwsomeBot: Beyecixramd: YAH RLY!!!
(23:53:57) Beyecixramd: o rly?
(23:53:58) AwsomeBot: Beyecixramd: YA RLY!!!
(23:54:03) Beyecixramd: orly?
(23:54:03) AwsomeBot: Beyecixramd: YARLY!!!
(23:54:06) Beyecixramd: WTF
(23:54:09) Beyecixramd: WHO CODED THIS BOT
(23:54:21) ***oGGy990 points at Bensawsome
(23:54:33) Beyecixramd: Bensawsome: U SUX!11!!1oneoneone!!!1
(23:54:47) Beyecixramd: hm....
(23:54:49) Beyecixramd: o, rly?
(23:54:53) Beyecixramd: :D fialComment: #gfire on irc.freenode.com
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#299854* (?/33) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* +Dib noms on cereal
<+Raiden> What cereal?
<Super_Sonic> The Cereal that Fights Back.
<+Dib> Optimum.
<+Raiden> Kix? XDComment: irc.esper.net
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#299861* (?/37) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Sinistrad <intergossip> I'm gonna quote the Bible at you
Sinistrad <intergossip> Thou shalt not lust after thy neighbor's boobs
Flumpy <intergossip> why not?
Sinistrad <intergossip> Because she has a burning bush
Sinistrad <intergossip> God ttly knew about VD, see
Flumpy <intergossip> groan
Sinistrad <intergossip> people just didn't get the message
Flumpy <intergossip> you would hope an omnicient being knew about VD
Sinistrad <intergossip> Moses was all, "Burning bush? Wonder what that means. Hey look, a whore! C'mere baby!"
Flumpy <intergossip> otherwise we're all fuckedComment: LPMuds.net InterMUD-3
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#299871* (?/29) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Love4Boobies> 95 users
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<lpf__> had to say something about user count, eh :PComment: freenode
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#299903* (?/45) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[|Chris] and motherless.com is always good if you're into jailbait, bestiality, and scat
[Catcher] yeah i like motherless sometimes |
#299914* (?/51) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dr7> pulseaudio has to be the worst fucking shit ever.
<`WarpKat> tell us how you REALLY feel, please?
<dr7> I thought i did :)
<`WarpKat> i think we need to have you elaborate just a weeeeeeeee bit more
<dr7> IT SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKS
<dr7> how's that
<`WarpKat> that'll do, pig...that'll doComment: irc.oftc.net/#linuxfriends
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#299988* (?/33) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
| 09:23:42 | <11@Google> (10:23:08 PM) <+Anthrophobic> you better tell him...
| 09:23:42 | <11@Google> (10:23:16 PM) <+Anthrophobic> the away system on mIRC is gay period..
| 09:23:50 | <11@Google> ADD/ADHD
| 09:24:10 | <04+Anthrophobic> what you mean?
| 09:24:24 | <04+Anthrophobic> I have ADHD but how can you tell?
| 09:24:31 | <09+David> 15,01lmfao
| 09:24:32 | <11@Google> you was talking bout something else then you... OMG I NEED A HAIRCUTComment: LMAO irc.flamechat.net
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#299995* (?/25) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<secretsqui> indeed
<@Anacrusis> I am a trilobite
<@Anacrusis> as always!
<secretsqui> yargh
<@Anacrusis> is that a noise of assent or just general displeasure?
<secretsqui> can't it be both?
<@Anacrusis> yargh
<secretsqui> this is what happens when steam doesn't work
* Hicktown (~mejewart@static-acs-24-154-186-21.zoominternet.net) has left #Beginner |
#300031* (?/25) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Woodcarver> Does anyone know what the cause of the orgasmic pee shivers is?
<Grey> wait what Woodcarver
<Grey> in men or women?
<Woodcarver> Men.
<Woodcarver> Like when you hold it in forever
<Kardos> pee shivers?
<Grey> ohhhhh
<Grey> THOSE
<Woodcarver> and then these waves of pleasure rush through your brain as you let it out
<Kobura> Woodcarver you really want to know
* ThingyMaster is confused.
<Kobura> Is pretty gay etc
<Woodcarver> Yes.
<Kobura> Your prostate being stimulated by the change of pressure
<Kobura> That's what it is.
<Woodcarver> Ahhh.
<Woodcarver> I see
<Kobura> so you have a little tiny bit of what it's like to be gay
<Kobura> come to the pink side
<Kobura> it's shivery here
<Woodcarver> So like butsecks, but totally straight.
<Kardos> So if you stimulated your prostate every time you took a piss you'd feel great everytime. |
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