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#304428* (?/50) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Wetwolf: hello
elaineloughlin923: Hello there.. My name is Mrs Whooty.. Got ur ID through Messenger Directory
Wetwolf: o_O
Wetwolf: lol
Wetwolf: from school?
elaineloughlin923: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
Wetwolf: ...
elaineloughlin923: Can i ask you a quest?
Wetwolf: ion... yes
elaineloughlin923: Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what i am/have..Is that too much for you to handle?
Wetwolf: lmfao
elaineloughlin923: Do you know what a whooty is? Would you like to see me i'll show you my Whooty....
Wetwolf: actually that is to much for me to handle
elaineloughlin923: lol Whooty is a White Girl with a BOOTY!  i wanna show u mine...
Wetwolf: im gay XD
elaineloughlin923: ok let me set up my camera for you honey..
Wetwolf: o_O
elaineloughlin923: um goto (randomassurl) and we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just click Accept Invite on the left!
Wetwolf: *runs*
Comment: spam IM's
#304433* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
TyrantWave: Hmm
TyrantWave: Don't Stop Me Now, The Show Must Go On, I Want It All, Under Pressure
TyrantWave: Those titles sound like corpse-looting music
TyrantWave: Although come to think of it
TyrantWave: Somebody to Love definitly should NOT be related to corpses
***TyrantWave should stop thinking
nub_hat: haha
TyrantWave: You're My Best Friend also doesn't really work...
TyrantWave: Unless
nub_hat: i kinda wanna sing like 20 songs about the same subject like that
TyrantWave: Queen were necros! =O
nub_hat: theyre gonna suck though as i cant sing
TyrantWave: I HAVE COME UPON A THEORY
TyrantWave: All their songs are to do with looting corpses or loving corpses
TyrantWave: The titles fit ._.
freakinalex|RB3: Bicycle Race?
Blehgopie|MaybeStuff: ogre battle
TyrantWave: freakinalex|RB3: Good way to distract the opponent, throw a corpse at them
Blehgopie|MaybeStuff: bohemian rhapsody
TyrantWave: "Mama, I killed a man"
Blehgopie|MaybeStuff: fat bottomed girls
TyrantWave: ....ew
nub_hat: killer queen
sboner8790: we are the champions
Con|SVU: ...
TyrantWave: Ok so my theory needs work, but I'm onto something dammit >_>
nub_hat: stone cold crazy
TyrantWave: ^ That works
nub_hat: yup
TyrantWave: Corpses aren't generally warm
Con|SVU: and stone - tombstone
#304459* (?/26) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Lunar Scythe: no birthday wishes? D:
Lord Socky: It's not my birthday.
Lord Socky: /coolface
Lunar Scythe: :C
Lord Socky: It's your birthday, though?
Lunar Scythe: yar?
Lord Socky: Well happy birthday, then!
Lunar Scythe: woot
Lord Socky: I wish you many... kangaroos, or whatever you people give each other
Lunar Scythe: presents, socky
Lunar Scythe: we give each other presents
Lord Socky: Really?  Wow, you guys are catching up fast.
Lord Socky: Soon, you might actually have electricity
Comment: I'm such a jerk to my Aussie friends.
#304470* (?/34) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<TriviaHero> .1754. TV / Movies: 1998, This Movie was Released on March 27 Meet The ---------- ?
<TriviaHero> 1st Hint: ******* Question Value : 6300 Points
[14:44:59] <this1neguy> fockers
<Amy> fockers
<sboner8790> fockers
<this1 neguy> parents
<Amy> parents
<sboner8790> parents
<Wupupuupup> parens
#304493* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
They say money dont buy love, but what if i love money ?
#304501* (?/40) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Darius: You want them to change, however that ain't going to happen.  Bitch and moan all you want, that's going to remain a constant.
Darius: I really don't know what you want me to do.
NastyCheese: I'm British dude, lol.
NastyCheese: I moan when it's hot and I moan when it's cold.
Darius: OK
Darius: Now please, speaking as a murrican now
Darius: Shut the fuck up, and sit the fuck down.
NastyCheese: :(
#304520* (?/42) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
[Yao] i played squash with meranda yesterday, it's a lot of fun, unless she collapsed in the final minute....
[Me] LOL
[Yao] and i say hi to 911 again yesterday
[Me] LOLOL oh my gosh.
[Me] That's horrible
That's so bad yet so funny at the same time.
[Yao] revarr said like a magic, ppl around me will get involved into accidents
wow
[Me] that's what I thought...
[Me] three times in a period of 6 weeks.
[Me] That's a record.
[Me] Even old seniors don't call that much.
[Me] XD
[Me] Poor Yao...
[Me] Life must be an adventure for you.
[Me] :)
[Yao] do i make you laugh loudly? :)
[Me] Yes.
[Me] Very much so.
[Me] :)
[Yao] thanks, i finally can use my shabby english to express my sense of humor
[Me] Maybe we should get you a good luck charm...
Oh no, "and i say hi to 911 again yesterday" made me laugh so hard.
[Yao] yes
[Me] There's a point where one's English is good enough, but not articulate enough that humor is provoked even without the one speaking knowing they're saying something funny.
[Me] Kinda like the "uncanny valley" of robotics
[Me] It's the golden point for you.
[Me] :)
[Yao] ok ok i know
[Me] Keep talking, you're making me feel better. :p
[Yao] do you feel hard?
[Me] ONCE AGAIN.... XD
[Yao] what!!!!!!
Comment: Facebook Chat
#304528* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<cms13>I've met women online, but never …legitimately…
<cms13>just like..Canadians
#304530* (?/42) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
< Hawky> hopefully there is a starbucks near him.
<+Jacob_> flame- is female.
< Hawky> oh
< Hawky> didnt know that
<@flame-> there's no starbucks in the entire country
<+coppro> Hawky: do you make assumptions professionally?
< Hawky> coppro: depends
< Hawky> cause im not very good at it.
#304545* (?/42) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@Rjx> I want to know how a computer would advise someone to hide an erectionComment: #geekissues
#304550* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
< Sudos> the one on the right is an analog 34-pin adapter
< tidux> weird
< Sudos> there's pinouts around I think
< Sudos> dunno
< Sudos> but still awesome
< Sudos> duked might have more info on it.
< Sudos> I got it for $3.50
< Sudos> at the fucking thrift shop.
< tidux> you ask duked about 34 pins and he'll start talking about that's
what it takes to keep his pants closed
Comment: duked is another (notoriously fat) regular in #wtfpwnt
#304552* (?/28) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Mortchek> I have decided to write a Lisp-inspired scripting language
<Mortchek> It will be called Rhotacism
#304559* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
* TheWatcher eyes this documentation in one of the project wikis
<%TheWatcher> co-worker attempting to explain learning objectives to course developers: "These acronyms may help you think about what you are creating: WALT (Learning objectives): We Are Learning To...; WILF (Learning outcomes): What I'm Looking For..."
<%TheWatcher> I'm having to exercise huge restraint to prevent myself from adding
<%TheWatcher> WWBD: What Would Batman Do...
< Bobsentme> Or "LART = Looking At Re-Training"  :P
#304562* (?/40) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Habstinat> runemaste: TBH, I was being stupid and copy/pasted a bunch of "I"s into my Twitter page to see how much Twitter could handle. The counter got to -367290 before the screen turned grey and it froze.
<Habstinat> :P
Comment: #ubuntu
#304589* (?/44) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<SaberUK> gemcraft? sounds like minecraft for ponies
#304598* (?/34) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<pitz> I don't know about you guys, but I've been playing Call of Duty: Black Cocks on my Wii all week!
#304615* (?/36) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<fss> that'll be the next big device scheme
<fss> instead of your electronics breaking randomly just outside their warranty period, they'll load it with time-release antimatter
<fss> so they can be sure that your stuff will fuck up just outside the warranty period
Comment: #WTB
#304618* (?/44) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
xK0NVIK: hi
SpencerGabbiani: Hey.
xK0NVIK: wts gud
xK0NVIK: mmm
SpencerGabbiani: Not your ability to spell, apparently.
xK0NVIK has left the chat
Comment: IMVU
#304624* (?/26) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<You> Chatting ain't nothin' but keyboards and text.
#304632* (?/58) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<DannyBoy> Some people really like getting shit stuffed in their dick.
<penis_> i like my dick to do the stuffing thx
<penis_> male power
#304653* (?/46) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@lysol> hmm shit minecraft is crashing
<@twentynine> wtf is minecraft
<@lysol> basically it's when you jerk off so much your dick gets red
<@duckstab> what lysol said. except also, everything is a cube.
Comment: #mefi slashnet
#304654* (?/30) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
[11:56:10pm] <ThatGuy> Ok I'm going to go rub one out
[11:56:12pm] <ThatGuy> BBS
[11:56:45pm] <Hopscotch> Ewwww
[11:57:03pm] <Razor> That's more than I needed to know...
[03:32:52pm] <ThatGuy> K, night
[03:32:59pm] * ThatGuy Quit (Quit: Sheep r cool)
[03:33:10pm] <Razor> It took him 4 hours?!
#304666* (?/24) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
* yazdmich is now known as BILLY_MAYS
<+LOLEX> BILLY MAYS LIVES!
<BILLY_MAYS> HI BILLY MAYS HERE FOR IRC
<BILLY_MAYS> ARE YOU BORED?
<BILLY_MAYS> DO YOU WANT NEW FRIENDS YOU NEVER HAVE TO MEET IN REAL LIFE?
<BILLY_MAYS> THEN IRC IS FOR YOU!
<+LOLEX> LOL!
<solidus> sell me some oxy clean
<solidus> without the clean
<BILLY_MAYS> IRC HAS BEEN PROVEN TO INCREASE NERDINES BY 15% PER MONTH
<Samantha> lol
<BILLY_MAYS> SO DONT DELAY
<solidus> thats good cuz im at -20%
<+LOLEX> billy mays is going back to his grave...for 19.99 plus shipping and hadling
<BILLY_MAYS> GET IRC TODAY
<+LOLEX> :D
<BILLY_MAYS> JOIN AN IRC NETWORK TODAY AND GET A FREE NICKSERV REGISTRATION ON ME!
<BILLY_MAYS> LOG ON NOW!!!!
Comment: after billy died :(
#304675* (?/42) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<LassiH> the next time i won't have to worry about school is in four and a half years
<LassiH> and evn after that i prolly need to do some stuff inbetween working for six years
<LassiH> so yay for me
<Athinira> YOUR LIFE IS GOING TO BE MISERABLE AND YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE IT!
<LassiH> YOU WILL EAT YOUR OWN GUTS AND ASK FOR SECONDS
<Athinira> I GOT INFINITE GUTS! YOUR COWARDICE IS GOING TO BE YOUR UNDOING
<LassiH> inb4 YOU ARE NOT PREPARED
<Athinira> :(
<Athinira> Going for a wank before i eat my guts i guess... :/
#304678* (?/44) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<LazyMice> holy shit
<LazyMice> cops outside
<LazyMice> brb
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