|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..89909192939495..599Next> |
#19782 (232/360) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<HardKase> i work for an isp , there is no "lets piss off the customers" button
<HardKase> ive looked for it
<||Rune||> we dont have a button
<||Rune||> we have to do it manually |
#27099 (292/456) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@Khel> haha, I just went upstairs, got a plate out of the cupboard, got pizza out of the fridge, then left the pizza on the bench and microwaved an empty plate for 2 minutes
<@Khel> gg me
<@tung> haha you suck
<Lithios> hahahaha
<@tung> at least you know the plate is clean now
<thrax> lol thats nothing, unwrapped a mars bar, and threw it in the bin and tryed to eat the wrapper.
<Parag0n> ROFL !!!! |
#30859 (325/509) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Xizer> Winzip is such a girl...
<Xizer> "Uh hey. 30 days are up could you stop using me? No? Well I'll just ask again tomorrow..." |
#30972 (331/517) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Snipah> I found an awesome hentai site.
<Snipah> free movies
<Snipah> pictures
<Snipah> games
<knightmare> pervert
2 minutes later...
<knightmare> link? |
#9501 (368/578) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<AgentSmith> It seems you have been leading two lives, Mr. Anderson. In one life, you are Robert Anderson, assistant cook at a Jack in the Box in Mesquite....in the other...you go by the chat alias "Randerson"...spreading homosexual propoganda, lying, and being a generally immature pest...
<AgentSmith> One of these...has a future.
<Randerson> LMAO OMFG where's the phone, I have to tell Dean about this
<AgentSmith> How can you use the phone when you cannot...speak?
*** AgentSmith sets mode: +m |
#11353 (235/365) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<guyen> holy shit i'm not going to be home this weekend, i have an online exam i have to take, but i'll be in LA
<guyen> there's a wedding going on so i won't be able to exactly just do it at my relative's house
<guyen> i'm looking for cybercafes and crap, the only thing i can find is some place called Yogi's Cyber Hut
<guyen> holy fuck i can't believe i'm depending on Yogi for my midterm grade
<xan> at least he's smarter than the average bear |
#3763 (359/565) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<[ric]> as the old joke goes, commodore is so bad a marketing, if they bought KFC they would rename it "warm dead bird" |
#144769 (241/375) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<hobblin> i had sex with a girl when i was drunk once
<hobblin> but we both remembered it
<hobblin> and we see eachother all the time
<hobblin> lets just say that she gives everyone else hugs and me high fives |
#266625 (354/560) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
kwenda: this lady who works here is so disgusting
kwenda: fat and ugly
kwenda: she rubbed my hair in the middle of a meeting
kwenda: i stood up and left the meeting without saying anything
kwenda: went to supercuts and got a shampoo and a haircut
kwenda: walked back into the meeting and sat down |
#297943 (284/444) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
< gloone> ok
< gloone> remember when i said i loved windows 7
< gloone> that was 2 blue screens agoComment: #geekissues
|
#300125 (283/443) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
muffy: i would not date a chinese girl
muffy: thats a big red flag |
#305261 (199/311) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* anarkoid has joined #ipsofacto
<anarkoid> HEY GUYS
<anarkoid> WHAT'S UP
<Save> lol caps much?
<anarkoid> oops
<anarkoid> i was writing youtube comments heh |
#307804 (53/77) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@timmo> i have found that smartphones have kept me from drunk texting ugly girls
<@timmo> due to their face popping up in every text |
#35217 (408/644) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* Tetra takes a boy
<Tetra> bow
<Tetra> damnit
<Tetra> bad bad mistype
* Tetra goes away to cry |
#37896 (246/384) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<TrafficCone> So I'm talking to my friend the day after I nailed his older sister in the bathroom ofthe local movie theater
<TrafficCone> and he starts going off about some time i made a total ass of my self in front of some girl i liked in high school when i was drunk
<FKNPWNED> Go on...
<TrafficCone> and there's a freaking platoon of people i don't want to hear this shit around, so i pipe up and say,
<TrafficCone> "Hey dude, your sister likes it when I slap her in the face with my Dick"
<TrafficCone> The next thing I know, I'm in the emergency room. The bastard knocked me out with a chair leg.Comment: 0wn3d
|
#37927 (250/390) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
quad341: Give a man a fish and you can feed him for a day, give him a religion and he'll starve to death praying for a fish. |
#52463 (239/373) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<DB> Oh god - what the fuck do they put in absinthe? i only had a couple and I feel like I've been raped by a camel..
<Rust_Bunny> It's meant to be taken orally .. |
#60437 (331/521) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[pd] fuck
[pd] i just remembered why i never got on aim/msn any more
[pd] fuckin people talk to me
[pd] HEY MAN LONG TIME NO SEE
[pd] for a reason you fuckfaces! |
#65907 (227/353) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<ArianaK> I want my money back.
<ArianaK> I forgot the name of the tea I'm drinking thats supposed to help your memory |
#77824 (287/449) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[JaMiNkLe] i am retarded.. trying to install Linux on my old dual 800 and it wont boot from the cd i tried everything then just after looking in the bios for the last time i went to open the cd drive to smash the fucking cd and it was upside down wasn't it >.< |
#80875 (549/875) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<%FreePlay> they seriously think that the Bible can answer every single goddamn question you ever have
<%FreePlay> I say, fuck that
<%FreePlay> if you want to limit your god to a single book, be my guest
<%FreePlay> go ahead and place limits on God, you arrogant know-it-all pricks
<+acme64> even lord of the rings was 3 books |
#14509 (240/374) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Joe> Who invented l33t-speak?
<Evil_Lawn_Gnome> Joe, I did.
<milencho880> i invented it
<Joe> Really? Good. I always wanted to meet the world's biggest fucking idiots. |
#16134 (277/434) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@n30> my "m" key is broken
<@renetiq> evidently. |
#22015 (221/343) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Friday> I did a science experiment on magnets and I cited MM3 for examples. I got First Place. I shit you not.
<McDohl> What did you do, take the game in there and go. "See how Megaman flies up like that? Megaman is metal, therefore he is attracted by the magnet robots!"
<Friday> Pretty much.
<Friday> I had screenshots. |
#28353 (273/427) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<pL1> atomic clocks are for wussies... i use the sun to tell the time...
<Blaxthos> sun doesn't sync well
<Blaxthos> with the 8 minute lag and all |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..89909192939495..599Next> |
|