|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..85868788899091..599Next> |
#10075 (289/446) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Vic> You there X?
<X> no
<X> fuck |
#6664 (271/417) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<qik> ur at school?
<De-Gen> yer
<qik> LOOK TEACHER IT SAYS CUNT ON THE SCREEN!
*** De-Gen has quit IRC |
#4954 (253/391) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<`rip> when you go into a job interview
<`rip> and they ask you what 3 of your weaknesses' are
<`rip> what do you say
<clay> you tell them that youre indecisive
<clay> and then stop talking |
#4738 (228/350) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* Synoptica bangs OutLore and Lord-Data
[Synoptica] fuck
[Synoptica] no i dont
* Synoptica bangs OutLore and Lord-Data's heads together |
#34218 (319/493) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Slime> I think in ten years time I will look back on days like this and cry.
<Slime> The times I spent at 2am talking about girls who have dicks and legs made of slugs eating each other whilst melting.
<Slime> My future wife will be all "Tell me what you did as a teenager" and I will say "NOW IS TIME FOR SLEEP"
<MechaMrEd> And then you'll notice she has an erection |
#40928 (225/345) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<FoxMulder> Don't you HATE growing up? As a kid you'd dread being called in after school by that sultry hot blonde teacher with the emo glasses and the figure-hugging blouse for a few whacks on the ass....NOW that I'm an adult I have to PAY for such treatment :(((((Comment: zanet.org.za network
|
#44934 (267/411) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* eLe sends hordes of lemmings over HolyGoat.
<HolyGoat> lemmings are cool :)
<HolyGoat> my g/f has lemmings
<eLe> Haha.
<HolyGoat> seriously :)
<rioter> does she make them all blow up?
<rioter> cause thats what i used to do
<HolyGoat> heh no, not the computer game
<rioter> computer game? |
#50000 (355/551) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<celti> Ahh!
<celti> No more sticky spacebar
<celti> ...fuck.
<celti> If you laugh, I will murder you. |
#50234 (293/455) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Ryozen: How's it going?
MinisterlnBlack: not too shabby
MinisterlnBlack: waiting for someone to come pick up my broken ass car
MinisterlnBlack: heh
Ryozen: Doh, that sucks
Ryozen: What happened to it?
MinisterlnBlack: there was an accident.
MinisterlnBlack: ::cough::
Ryozen: Heh, did you kill anyone?
MinisterlnBlack: nah, the sorority girl in front of me got lucky
MinisterlnBlack: heh
Ryozen: You rear-ended a sorority girl? *cough*
MinisterlnBlack: haha
MinisterlnBlack: man, my accident just got 10x cooler. |
#63011 (249/385) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<mikeash> ok, look, if there's a specific problem that prompted you to come in here
<mikeash> then you should actually *ask about your specific problem*
<mikeash> asking us extreme generalities when you have a specific issue at hand just frustrates people
<mikeash> it's like going up to a construction site, asking all the workers there, "how do I build a house?" and then once they've given you a bunch of advice you reveal that your circular saw is broken and you're wondering how to fix it |
#63290 (297/459) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Sonic McTails: Man, work is dead today
Nokoatheart: That sucks.
Nokoatheart: hey, wait...
Nokoatheart: Don't you work in a hospital? |
#74348 (243/373) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
fibrosis> It has even been estimated that one in 10 Europeans are conceived in an Ikea bed.
dalamar> That's an awful lot of Ikea beds.
fibrosis> or a handful of very dirty beds |
#79451 (260/400) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
[@TheWickerMan] I'd wear white ipod headphones and hook it up to my shit walkman
[@TheWickerMan] then I would walk through the ghetto and look at all these people gathering around like they're going to jack me
[@TheWickerMan] that's when I pulled out the walkman
[@TheWickerMan] and they'd take pity on me...some guy even offered me a buck... |
#40098 (291/455) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
[SaladFork] Wow, that was really nerdy
[KOZOR] ?
[SaladFork] Today in computer science, there was this other kid there that knew of the QDB
[SaladFork] long story short, we were shouting quote numbers back and forth, and then a few seconds later, hearing the other person laugh.
[SaladFork] I am now, a true nerd. |
#44470 (234/360) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* sexylady69 has joined #phishtank
* sexylady69 is now known as craig`
<craig`> ahem. |
#46060 (340/528) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(+lab-rat) 22. What is the largest native carnivore in England?
(+lab-rat) Here's your 1st hint, the last character in the answer is: r
(+lab-rat) Here's your 2nd hint, badge_
(+sodiepop) badger
(mac23) badger
(alexC) badger
(+StiGs) badger
(TIMMY_) badger
(+Turbo) mushroom mushroom
(+lab-rat) Winner: Trainee alexC Answer: badger Time: 23.422 Streak: 1 Points: 5 WPM: 3 Rank: 37thComment: Gotta love trivia!
|
#49451 (277/427) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<kulprits> wats te best way to test if a video card is faulty
<SoundLove> look at the monitor. |
#50190 (326/506) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(+Mafi) A friend of mine, earlier, kept nudging me, making my computer run slow
(+Mafi) (Over MSN)
(+Mafi) So I said "Do that one more time, and I'll kill you."
(+Mafi) She did it once more
(+Mafi) I waited 'til she was playing World of Warcraft
(+Mafi) And nudged her, spammed her, and sent voice clips
(+Mafi) ...I killed her ENTIRE GROUPComment: #otf_games on irc.gamesurge.net
|
#51634 (368/572) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<f1agrant> I just saved a ton of money on my car insurance by fleeing the scene of the accident. |
#51643 (340/526) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<ryan`> god i fucking rule
<ryan`> my brother stole money from me
<ryan`> so i mixed elmers glue with a bit of water
<ryan`> then i spread some over my sisters little hand puppets
<ryan`> and threw it half way under his bed
<ryan`> now hes grounded all next week for "jacking off with her hand puppets" |
#53269 (289/447) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<TMH> and now I will try a new combination!
<TMH> pringles
<TMH> and garlic and herb dip
* TMH steps forwards into a new frontier!
<TMH> OH MY GOD IT TASTES AWFUL
<@Jude> A new frontier of disgust?
<TMH> it's like eating solid semen
<@Jude> ... Ew.
<TMH> ... not that I have ever eaten solid semen
<@Jude> I was going to ask
<TMH> hm, I'm actually developing a taste for it
<TMH> oh my god I am developing a taste for what I just described as solid semen
<TMH> I AM CONFUSED |
#56771 (298/462) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<BlackDeth> so this guy on the radio the other day was saying how there's a law that you can't sue gunmakers for injuries caused by their products
<BlackDeth> then he went on to suggest that all industries can protect themselves from liability claims if they just made their products start firing bullets
<BlackDeth> that would be awesome |
#57018 (352/548) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<lefter> anyways, long sorty short, she shoved 2 fingers in my ass
<celeste_> literally, or figuratively?
<lefter> literally
<lefter> i don't know how you would have 2 fingers figuratively put into ones ass |
#79435 (368/572) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jebus> I stole your wallet though
<Jebus> :D
<pr0tekk> i dont have a wallet anymore
<pr0tekk> it got stolen.
<pr0tekk> wait.
<pr0tekk> ;0 |
#298636 (132/202) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Gilded> Info: I am now "the Insane" in WoW and have thus won in life
<Gilded> That is all
<insane_alien> winning in life and playing WoW are mutually exclusive |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..85868788899091..599Next> |
|