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#153809 (190/282) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* lady_di8 whips himself with a mouse cord
<Jeff> himself wtf
* lady_di8 has quit IRC (Quit: ) |
#180558 (156/230) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<RancorClaw> I like that hentai you recommended yesterday. I like how all the girls are sexually liberated, and can enjoy their sex lives
<RancorClaw> As opposed to the "typical" girl who's ashamed of her sexuality, and afraid to use it
<RancorClaw> And the contrast of the only boy being quite submissive towards all of the dominating women, is interesting as well
<keikii> why are you analyzing a hentai?
<RancorClaw> Because I'm stupid |
#182652 (125/183) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Tinted_Green> ok Grugg
<Tinted_Green> you and me
<Tinted_Green> we have to do that one day
<Tinted_Green> go to a pub
<Tinted_Green> and get a pint in a teapot
<Tinted_Green> and we have to wear top hats
<Tinted_Green> and monocles
<Tinted_Green> and speak in a highly refined english accent
<Tinted_Green> and see how long it takes them to throw us out
<Grugg> As soon as I can afford a ticket to australia
<Grugg> We will do this
<Turks> not without me you're fucking not
<Grugg> Didnt you threaten to murder me with an umbrella if you ever met me?
<Turks> i say alot of things |
#232561 (307/461) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* WolfLord np: Draft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger [04:15m/128Kbps/44KHz]
<LLamaBoy> draft punk?
<LLamaBoy> is that the unfinished version? |
#297048 (238/356) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<+August> speaking of which, mom yelled at me the other day for not having a flying carpet in WoW.
<+August> i was like mom, my tailoring isn't high enough.
<+August> she was like "well get on it!" |
#299591 (209/311) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Reznor> I feel like a tool because I just ironed my shoelaces. |
#300671 (290/436) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<DCoder> cute
<DCoder> my Amazon.co.uk recommendations consist of C++, Hacking, and Malware Forensics books
<DCoder> ...
<DCoder> and a Zapf Creations Barbie
<DCoder> wtf |
#301056 (129/189) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<froggey> gta4 is fantastic. just got run over by the stationary car i was trying to steal :D |
#304488 (217/325) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<octdave> i need to poop and eat
<octdave> ever ate a sandwich while pooping?
<octdave> I might try that, to save time
<officer_falcon> save even more time, just throw the sandwhich into the toilet
<officer_falcon> take out the middle man |
#305605 (99/143) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Crispy> Rational behavior: Behavior that can be expressed as a fraction. |
#308160 (122/178) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Sebas> Someone I deliver post to is called P. Margarita
<Sebas> I hope her first name is Pizza |
#311245 (38/54) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<nacht> I sold body armor in a rite aid parking lot yesterday.
<Naraka> I love everything about that.
<nacht> Ohio ftw
<nacht> Are you a felon? No? Here buy this AK and 2000 rounds out of my trunk. |
#11264 (295/443) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Saber> I had a full can of soda
<Saber> and I slipped
<Saber> and dropped it above my KB
<Saber> and I caught it
<Saber> but THOUGHT it was upside down
<Saber> so I inverted it
<Saber> and it turns out
<Saber> it was rightside up |
#10052 (344/519) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Kiz`> a semi decent looking girl can get laid whenever she wants
<Kiz`> just go up to a guy
<Kiz`> "sex?"
<Kiz`> a guy can't do such things
<Yuffie> Maybe you haven't gone up to the right guy? |
#7954 (276/414) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<wisner> I walked past a protest on Market Street yesterday evening.
<wisner> I didn't burst out laughing, but I really had to work for it.
<wisner> It was JEWISH LESBIANS FOR PEACE IN THE MIDDLE EAST.
<wisner> There was singing. |
#34786 (340/512) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<p2p> I was reading some thing this morning about a new condom with a built-in vibrator
<shxrobert> oh great the rubber that makes you come as you put the fucker on
<p2p> the downside is you have to shove the AA battery up your ass
<Gollie> downside? |
#37376 (316/476) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Nesta> The maker doesn't need it,
<Nesta> The buyer doesn't use it,
<Nesta> The user uses it without knowing.
<Nesta> What is it?
<el draco> damn i know this
<el draco> the grave thing
<el draco> i dont know how to say in english
<el draco> the box you wear when you die |
#37873 (227/339) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[@WhipSmart]if you're looking for reality, musicals are the last place to find it..
[@WhipSmart]I mean, look at West Side Story...
[@WhipSmart]he runs thru Spanish Harlem yelling 'Maria!' and only ONE girl looks out the window..?
[@WhipSmart] what's up with that..? |
#43490 (238/356) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Calum> going to bed at 4am, then getting woken by traffic at 8am is unpleasant
<Calum> *grumbles about his head being sore*
<Alice> How about going to bed at 1 am and waking up at 5 to go to work?
<Calum> that's also unpleasant
<Alice> It is what I am about to do
<Calum> i've gone to bed at 5 and gotten up at 6 for work before
<@ALC> but its effectively 2 am :p
<+MStar> or drinking heavily and waking up the next morning wearing nothing but kitty ears in some stranger guy's bed?
<Calum> wtf?
<Alice> o.O
<@ALC> ...
<+MStar> i mean.. finish school project at 4 and need to wake up at 7.
<Calum> oh yeah, that's unpleasant. |
#45624 (232/346) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<snu`> i registered for fall classes
<snu`> >_<
<snu`> Chem 251, Eng 101, Math 113, Engr 107
<synth> ......YOU'RE TAKING ENGRISH? |
#55863 (277/415) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
< Crew^> i was so nervous when i had to be checked when i joined the army
< Crew^> then i was asked to leave the army because they thought i was too dangerous
< Crew^> only in canada can you be too dangerous to be in the army |
#58994 (332/500) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<rm-fr> jesus fuck, my ass has been like Celine Dion's mouth all damn day
<DesScorp> wrapped around her husband's cock?
<Verjigorm> Sitting beneath an ENORMOUS nose?
<rm-fr> randomly spewing out copious amounts of crap
<rm-fr> I'm not sure I care for the implications of either of your answersComment: #bifemunix on EFnet
|
#60282 (385/581) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Kodan882: Once a long time ago, I was listening to a talk radio show.
Kodan882: THey werre talking about motorcycles, and a guy called in and screamed "PENIS!" and then hung up.
DragonOfLight121: ...
DragonOfLight121: LOL
Kodan882: The guys at the station were silent
Kodan882: Though, you could hear laughter in the background
DragonOfLight121: xD |
#64908 (299/449) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Draconx> codered, aplay < /dev/urandom
<kepstin> if you hear noise, it works
<codered> oh FUCK
<codered> that was loud
<codered> I woke up my gf....
<codered> I think I just shit my pants |
#68041 (291/437) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<bubba> don't they have laws against lying in advertising?
<bubba> this coax cable i just bought says "Connects satellite and digital cable sources with no signal loss"
<glasnost> "Comes with complementary 'Fuck you, second law of thermodynamics' bumper sticker" |
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