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#54801 (264/390) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Sarah> lol, i was at a speech and debate tournament in 9th grade at a public high school in albuquerque. the counselor's office was right next to the culinary arts office. on the counselor's office window, there was a poster that said "Suicide: A permanent solution to a temporary problem" and on the culinary arts window there was a poster that read: "Use the right knife" |
#56811 (254/378) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<forkup> yo
<forkup> i'm off to jail for a day or so, bbl |
#7630 (271/401) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<XxChesterxX> who here uses a dildough
<Solidus> only when i'm making some dilbread |
#3111 (268/397) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(Brodie) If I go see a doctor and tell him I can't maintain an erection, will he give me Viagra?
(Brodie) I need viagra for my paln
(Samadhi) He may check you though
(Samadhi) Like give you a HJ to make sure you're telling the truth
(Brodie) Sweet
(Brodie) This is win win |
#29717 (317/471) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AlmtyBob> I'm going to have the girl I made out with come to my office on her lunch break
<AlmtyBob> and have some "fun at work"
<AlmtyBob> *wink wink* *nudge nudge*
<IceWizard> ... you two are going to link up GBAs?
<IceWizard> and play Tetris?
<AlmtyBob> N0!
<AlmtyBob> ADVANCE WARS PLS |
#28517 (259/383) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Vamp_Boy> Arguing with the ops is like shaking your fist at God. There's nobody there; and if there is, he's not listening. And if he's listening, all you're doing is pissing him off. |
#31858 (456/686) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Karina> there are two people having mutual masturbation on my bed
<Karina> i'm going to blow.
<Gravity> what?
<Gravity> they're fingering each other on your bed?
<Karina> yes
<Gravity> male and female?
<Karina> yes
<Gravity> and are they both cute?
<Karina> yes
<Gravity> and you got on here to tell me about it ?
<Karina> yes
<Gravity> and didn't go join?
<Karina> no
<Gravity> If you have two hot people diddling around in your bed, and you're bi, and they're open, and you get on irc to tell someone else about it instad of joining/watching... You might be an addict. |
#13426 (273/406) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Glasses> Quebec is on fire?
<Glasses> I'm sure the rest of Cananda won't be too upset...
<Paul> Upset? THey started it. |
#29664 (291/433) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<sendai> where the heck do you find a 6litre bottle of coke
<sendai> ah...
<sendai> tis a 2l bottle
<sendai> dana photoshopped it to say 6l :p
<danamania> tis tis
<Kreator> same place you get those giant novelty bears from
<danamania> photoshop has giant novelty bears?
<goodby> yes!
<goodby> Filter -> Other -> Giant Novelty Bears |
#53019 (194/286) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Currawong> I have a 486 in the corner that's been compiling XFree since 1999.
<@Currawong> Every so often I think about cancelling the job, but then I'd have to go shop for a space heater. |
#53240 (306/456) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DaFool> i just bought a chip for my car from ebay...i fucking bought like 5 things off the guy and he was supposed to send the chip but jus sent a cd
<LinuxFox> how much did it cost?
<DaFool> it was only 20 bucks with shipping but still wtf he made like 500 bucks off me already
<LinuxFox> people dont understand EBAY ...you send money for a item..and if they dont send it all ebay can do is close down their store or their account and you can leave a negative remark lol NO CONSEQUENSES!
<DaFool> well the only thing i dont get is that on the cd all it is is a video of a guy laughing holding a 20 up close :/
<DaFool> who the fuck would buy that?
<Lemmiwinks> you seriously dont see where this is going? |
#54315 (348/520) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<er> So a Mafia boss is on his death bed, and he calls his grandson over
<er> and he says, "Son, I'd like you to have my gold-plated revolver."
<er> But the son replies, "You know, grandpa, I don't really like guns. Can I have your Rolex watch instead?"
<er> The boss says, "Listen to me, son. Some day, you'll be boss of the family, have a beautiful wife and a big house.
<er> And then, one day, you come home and your wife's in the arms of another man.
<er> What are you going to do, point to your Rolex and say, 'Time's Up'?" |
#55433 (314/468) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Paradiddler> I love when young children spin the rims on parked vehicles
<Keru> <Paradiddler> I love young children
<peer> you just love young children
<Paradiddler> what are you implying
<Evilhomer> I think they're implying you touch children in inappropriate places, in exchange for candy.
<Paradiddler> candy is delicious. why would i give it away to grubby children
<Evilhomer> good point |
#176955 (301/447) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
DabooAWAY: i smell bad
DabooAWAY: i mean spell |
#294828 (262/388) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<PurityOfEssence> I was at the gym, and I was looking at the distance left: 1km, 500m, 250m, 125m ..
<PurityOfEssence> this is how all mathmo's nightmares go
<PurityOfEssence> a fear of infinite sums diverging
<PurityOfEssence> you'll never get there, just keep getting half way closer
<PurityOfEssence> damn zeno |
#295261 (124/180) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<numaris> you pidantic bitch santa
<SantaBJ> pedantic. |
#305429 (225/333) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@AnnonSSI> ... /google-starts-censoring-bittorrent-rapidshare-and-more-110126/
<@Skitzo> noooooooooo
<@Skitzo> fuck google
<@Skitzo> i'm never going to use another google product again
<@Skitzo> except for my phone
<@Skitzo> and google chrome because it's a rad browser
<@Skitzo> and gmail
<@Skitzo> and gtalk
<@Skitzo> and google search
<@Skitzo> shit |
#306366 (108/156) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<mabb> my project has been research into "is this possible" for the first 3 weeks. Now it's moved onto "Hey, this might be possible"
<yicui> is it proven rigourously?
<mabb> more like proven religiously: I'm praying that this works |
#309463 (55/77) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rays0re> i caught myself a beetle
<Rays0re> he's in my hand
<Rays0re> what should i name him?
<Deepy> If you got a tight grip, name him Beetlejuice |
#310585 (30/40) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< rycuda> Well, turns out that I need glasses
< BrainoMite> rycuda, walk into the wall again?
< rycuda> BrainoMite: close, I walked into an optician |
#310827 (28/42) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kyol> Oh good! My dog's found a chainsaw!
<me_tew> That's one hell of a retriever, Kyol. |
#8290 (309/460) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Vegeta> I would go to the end of the earth for you
<Girl> Yes, but would you stay there? |
#6562 (341/510) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<skrike> I think the people above me are having sex
<skrike> either that or they're sleeping restlessly and agreeing with each other a lot. |
#1701 (307/457) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Camo> tress, how do I make a program that makes the cd spin really fast and does't stop and if you open the cdrom drive, the cd flies out and cuts your throat? |
#3908 (291/436) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** Jei-Dijitaru has quit IRC (Do we really need warnings that the lead in paint will kill you? Keep in mind that these people have already made a conscious decision to CONSUME PAINT.) |
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