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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..69707172737475..599Next> |
#9370 (363/536) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<stank> guys.. i went out tonight.
<stank> i pretended to be a normal college student.
<stank> and i stood uncomfortably on a porch with a bunch of people i don't know.
<stank> but then i ran into bill and will, who were pretending in the same way.
<stank> so we talked about networks and i felt better. |
#6473 (300/442) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<trance> ooo the heat is on in my house, my dad must have gotten a raise |
#31196 (360/532) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<chris> i have a pad of paper in front of me that is a list of every single thing i own.
<matt> what's on it?
<Mephistol> '1 pad of paper' |
#30860 (476/708) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<wild-> a priest, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a bar
<wild-> and that's just the first guy
<wild-> hayoooooooooooooo |
#28488 (274/402) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Deepthroat> The thing that always got me about the goatse.cx guy is that he's wearing a wedding ring. Does his wife know he can cram a week's worth of camping gear up there? Does she know that her husband's gaping ass has become an internet super sensation? Is it a secret, or is she a part of his anal adventures? Did she clap when he managed to solve a Rubik's cube using only the muscles of his colon?
<StarDonut> Deepthroat: For all you know, she's the one with the camera. |
#26215 (270/396) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Video] I've been watching the warez scene for like two months.
[Video] Nothing is worth DOWNLOADING
[Video] That's sad
[Ouija] i know
[Video] Is that their new anti-piracy technique?
[Video] Release shit no one wants? |
#28993 (266/392) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Yamatto> note to self
<Yamatto> shave before leaving hotel tomorrow so as not to scare the little children
<Stikes> taken too many ways :(
* Magus snickers
<Yamatto> my face you bastards
<Yamatto> my face |
#28981 (271/399) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<bailey> nice, i emailed a guy about his ebay auction asking if the soundcard he's selling works and comes with drivers
<bailey> and he replied "please do not bid on this item" |
#27828 (298/440) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[5:36] :: truder- [test@intrud3rz.users.undernet.org] signed off.. [Quit: A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over; nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home.] |
#25051 (370/548) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AleX> i guess this channel must be a center of activity; when i not rarondn an;sc;ln vialmnv,ma v,xznm f dlJFSMSMMMSMMSM:HHHFRRF
<DerianX> Yes.
<AleX> sorry, i stopped caring halfway through that sentnece |
#21874 (273/405) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bismarck>Ok.
<Bismarck>500.000 people watching the game.
<Bismarck>22 players on the field.
<Bismarck>2 referees and the coaches.
<Bismarck>so WHY does the FUCKING BIRD have to shit on MY HEAD? |
#35410 (7786/11922) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* Kio has quit IRC (Quit: )
* TRR has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
* Aquazzz has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
* RiotingNerd has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
* flatface has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
* Bobbobs has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
* mikedepalma has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
* evolsoulx has quit IRC (Peer Pressure) |
#49559 (316/466) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Jakl> oh god that was not good
<Jakl> okay so my balls were itching right
<rat> I don't like the way this is sounding...
<Jakl> they wouldn't quit so i went into my wifes bathroom and got some anti-itch cream
<Jakl> i squeeze some out of the tube and apply it to my sack
<Jakl> it starts burning, and within seconds i feel like my balls are going to melt off
<Jakl> istarted screaming and my wife ran in and was like "what's wrong?!"
<Jakl> i explain my situation and she starts cracking up
<Jakl> as i'm standing there nearly in tears she grabs the tubee and points to the ingredients
<Jakl> the cream was mentholated
<rat> rofl
<Jakl> my nuts are still burning even after a shower
<Jakl> but the itching stopped |
#49878 (403/599) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Victorian_Skunk> Is there a new virus going around? My Windows has suddenly changed to another language! I think it's Croatian.
<Dan> You Got Serbed!Comment: #rpgnet
|
#51011 (331/489) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<pmv> How do you escape from a for loop?
<Argue> Make a break for it. |
#54441 (381/565) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< plasmadis> One time my dad stole a roll of brightly-colored stickers from a butcher's counter that said "BREASTS" and went to the video store and stuck them on all the movies that looked likely to contain nudity. |
#54547 (345/511) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
includestdioh: in hebrew i read about a sentence a minute because i basically brute force every word
includestdioh: because you have to fill in the vowels yourself
Nomihn0: mm
includestdioh: sort of like when chatting on AIM with twelve year olds |
#56197 (337/497) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rusty> have you ever really thought about when people call themselves a bad motherfucker?
<Rusty> i mean wtf
<Rusty> "fear me! for not only do i engage in sex acts with a parent, but i suck at it!" |
#56620 (295/435) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Br0> Who DOESNT want a laptop that doubles as an easybake oven?
<@Br0> I mean come on
<@Br0> cupcakes while playing doom 3?
<@Br0> I know I want them
<%conscio> bake at UT2003 for 45 minutes |
#60287 (361/535) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Elly> hmm
<Elly> how expensive are 3ds max and photoshop?
<Eldritch> free :P
<Elly> no seriously
<Eldritch> I am serious
<Elly> why would photoshop be free?
<Elly> 3ds max definitely isn't free
<[Bond]> free.
<Eldritch> Elly bitrorrent
<[Bond]> heh
<Elly> I want a legit copy
<Eldritch> oh lol what for?
<Elly> Photoshop CS2 is $650
<Elly> who are they kidding
<Elly> I'm not buying that
* Elly fires up BitTorrent |
#73512 (366/542) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Retro: I have discovered how life works.
Retro: "Men: No shirt, no service"
Retro: "Women: No shirt, free drinks!" |
#176553 (200/292) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< nitrogen> who played tony stark in the new iron man?
< curgoth> Robert Downey Jr.
< curgoth> best choice for an alcoholic ego-maniac evar
< Novel> I thought that would be charlie sheen
< jose_> i thought that was gw bush
< curgoth> ok, but no one is going to believe charlie sheen playing a genius
< curgoth> and, um, ditto
< curgoth> imagine either sheen or bush uttering the line "if my math is right - and it always is..." |
#300402 (52/72) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<lewwy> so i invited some chicks over tomorrow night to build a computer
<lewwy> cuz they're sorta interested in how computers work etc etc
<lewwy> but they cancelled on me this morning...
<Splinton> Ah, thats not good.
<lewwy> yeah i wonder if i scared them off after i started reffering to at as "wild unprotected pc building"
<Splinton> ... |
#302845 (344/510) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@fewyn> so i send my mom a text saying happy mother's day i get one back saying "ty, send treats for my dog in farmville plz" |
#304489 (111/159) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+teratos> I am sick and dying
<+teratos> It was nice knowing you friends
<+}> teratos: what are you suffering from?
<+teratos> Pizza Hut Lunch Buffet |
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