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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..363364365366367368369..599Next> |
#4021 (92/274) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Dark_un> man this shit is fucked
<Synoptica> whats that?
* Dark_un produces a piece of shit with a particularly suspicious looking hole |
#8335 (80/235) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Gorilla> all the other kids got cool sutff like "Air!" "Earth!" "Fire!" and the poor little Indian kid kinda sheepishly whimpered at the end "....heart...."
<neored13> They should've given him Metal.
<GKSetzer> he could be like a glam rocker
<Zephy> oh yeah. then he'd have been gary glitter.
<Zephy> "AIR" "FIRE" EARTH" "PAEDOPHILE" |
#10904 (83/245) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<StrScream> my pants are back up, after almost no downtime in the last 2 years. |
#114682 (54/162) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Anonzz> Lord-Frost: here is a challenge for you then...
<+Anonzz> I'm hard yet soft, I am coloured yet clear, I am fruity and sweet. I am jelly. What am I?
<&Lord-Frost> gayComment: #/b/tv@rizon.net
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#154605 (190/592) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@randi> seething. in. rage.
<@randi> i mean, seriously. who the fuck tries to connect to ssl via ssh?
<@randi> ssh must be the end all solution for connecting to *anything* that is encrypted
<@randi> i mean, my god.
<@randi> seriously.
<@randi> how the fuck did i ever have sex with him.
<@Verjigorm> Tab A, slot B
<@rm-fr> you had sex with someone who doesn't know the difference between ssh and ssl and who can't configure a FreeBSD workstation?
<@randi> YES
<@randi> i'm going to go home and scrub my vag until it bleeds.Comment: #bifemunix on EFnet
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#297804 (101/303) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*** Alver hums a cheery tune
*** griffon trys to figure out why libpthread.so is being linked to his app
*** ianj buys a domain name
*** TriOx jailbreaks his iphone 3GS
*** Alver steals TriOx' iphone, runs a webserver on it, hijacks ianj's domain, makes it show goatse.cz from the httpd on the iphone, and lures griffon into thinking it's a page on libpthread.so
<Alver> MO-MO-MO-MONSTER KILLLLL |
#307373 (62/174) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< kn0where> a fox is like a cat and a dog rolled into one
< auxchar> And when you light it on fire, you get a web browser, too. |
#310773 (19/45) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Reaper> Why do we need a magnetic field in our giant spaceship
<Sleepy> we'll all be dead from solar radation in like days if not less
<Sleepy> I hope you're not planning to nav your ship by compass :p
<Reaper> And, honestly, the magnetosphere doesn't stop radiation. It stops solar wind particles from stripping away the atmosphere :-D
<WK> what relevance would a compass have in a spaceship anyway?>
<Dragonfly> how else are you supposed to draw circles? |
#299924 (24/62) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Funkmob> He's replaced Coke with Code... he does hundreds of lines a night. |
#304880 (30/80) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<wethrin> We use tcsh by default at the university
<wethrin> I'm not sure why, other than to discourage the use of the Unix systems |
#310654 (23/55) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Jigsy^Vol> My favorite episode of Star Wars was when Kirk got assimilated by the Darleks. |
#311595 (27/61) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<dokodonmystery> reading character descriptions of smash characters is so funny because it's like
<dokodonmystery> this is lucas, his life and family were ruined by colonialists and capitalism
<dokodonmystery> this is snake, he's a genetic clone who suffers from the cost of endless war
<dokodonmystery> this is king dedede. he loves food |
#33775 (92/276) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<O`Slice> silicon, get your dremel
<O`Slice> i need to get my teeth fixed
<O`Slice> can you make killer designs on my teeth?
<O`silicon> hmm
<O`Slice> and then place a window on my cheeks
<O`Slice> so all can see
<O`Slice> and have LEDs
<O`silicon> how about a 80mm fan for hot food/drinks
<O`Slice> yes
<O`Slice> i was thinking of watercooling it
<O`Slice> but whatever you can do
<O`Live> large fans with fan blades made up of smaller fans |
#41182 (97/289) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<J_MAN> what sex are you and how old
<Samsa> my name is Gregor Samsa, and I awoke this morning to find myself transformed into a monstrous vermin |
#44701 (99/297) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<usu_> Well, for the past weeks, Bush's approval rating has consistently been well below 50%.
<usu_> And you all know what that means, right?
<usu_> To put it in perspective, it means that if he were a quote on QDB, his score would be below 0.
<usu_> Huzzah! |
#55107 (90/270) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Botje> i'm waiting for vim's omnicompletion to become intelligent
<decay> omnicompletion?
<decay> what does it do?
<decay> complete on all available sources? :)
<infi> you type in #!/usr/bin/perl -w, hit TAB, and it writes your program for you
<Botje> infi: that's for vim7.43
<infi> these newfangled neural DWIM interfaces kick ass
<decay> only question left: my editor wrote the wrong program for me, what can i do?
<integral> press tab again to begin cycling through the programs |
#13198 (75/221) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[01:05] <Hiyaz> I have my Windows 95 dick from my old Desk top
[01:05] <Elysian`> hmm
[01:05] <Elysian`> win95 dick
[01:05] <magtec> some may call me desperate, but i really don't think i'd want one of those.
[01:07] <MrSparkle> magtec: you never know what kinda virus you could get from a Win95 d....
[01:07] <Elysian`> a STD
[01:07] <Elysian`> Setup Transmitted Disease |
#14462 (76/224) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Breathe> I hurt my back last week, and it is still hurting. >:(
<SirPrux> Maybe you sprained a muscle
<SirPrux> I sprained a cucumber once
<@Breathe> ...
<SirPrux> man did it hurt
<@Breathe> you sprained a cucumber?
<huzyrdadi> I think he means he sprained his asshole /using/ a cucumber |
#15557 (90/270) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ismell> drove like 2.5 hrs
<travolta> 15 year olds can drive?
<ismell> permit
<MattDC> shit smelly, where do you live
<ismell> colorado
<travolta> they let kids do anything in colorado, like have guns and trench coats |
#18271 (87/259) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Shrapnull> It's not how the boat floats, or the size of the mast, but the motion of the ocean
<Aduro> lol
<Tiffy> haha
<cryptonix> just hope your seamen don't have scurvey :D |
#19417 (86/254) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Rayne> what does /finger do anyway?
<ShadowZero> it pleasures |
#20502 (127/390) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Riku> One time, there was an American, an Irishmen (I think), and a Polish guy who just robbed a bank and were hiding out in a barn.
<Riku> But then they heard the cops come, so the american hid behind a cow, the irish guy hid behind a pig, and the polish guy hid behind a sack of potatoes
<Riku> So when the cops came in, they shined the flashlight on the cow
<Riku> so the american guy went "moooo"
<Riku> then they shined it on the pig, and the irish guy when "oink oink"
<Riku> Then, they shined it on the sack of potatoes
<Riku> And the polish guy went, "Potato" |
#25330 (74/218) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Kethry> Leida, you're more than a trend now
<Leida> what am i now? what can there possibly be above a trend?
<Sensai-Sakiya> god? immortal? person worshiped by all?
<Leida> you are all worshipping me?
<Ibaimendi> I never realized the line between abuse and worship was so thin. |
#28961 (91/273) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@kingmob> does ms outlook speak nntp?
<@synec> if it did, it would be news to me |
#29156 (112/340) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<icorislicoris> does anyone else have this problem where if you open your mouth too wide while you yawn your jaw unhinges and gets stuck?
<icorislicoris> it's really painful :(
<octothorpe> no, but can i fuck your mouth? |
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