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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..311312313314315316317..599Next> |
#2904 (131/321) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Berzerker> they gave christopher reaves a standing ovation
<Berzerker> and like
<Berzerker> he cant even stand up
<Berzerker> so hes like
<Berzerker> wtf |
#2998 (113/274) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dboo> shit...i can hear the cat masturbating again |
#3321 (125/305) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Road> { private: long member; }
<Road> but for me, that would be a long long
<DAL9000> Road: you'd have to cast it to a char though.
<Road> DAL9000: Hmm, that would cause an overflow
<DAL9000> hah.
<DAL9000> no big deal, i hear you always prematurely core dump anyway
<Road> hahah, ouch
<DAL9000> I COUNTER YOUR GEEK COUNTER WITH AN EVEN GEEKIER COUNTER. |
#3415 (123/300) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Crappy> tbe
<Crappy> er
<Crappy> the internet is cool
<Crappy> my triumphant statement somewhat dampened by my inability to type "the" |
#3873 (128/313) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Scofco> I wish I invented Jesus |
#3888 (89/213) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nitrifik_> wtf? that's blazemore? he looks 12!
<P2E> maybe that's why he has so much porn |
#4383 (131/321) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Real> I found a hooker with a heart of gold. I TORE IT OUT AND MELTED IT DOWN FOR DRUG MONEY! |
#5030 (102/244) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<clay> i read the word "c'mon" in a comic book
<clay> so i went to my mom
<clay> and said
<clay> mom, what does c'mon mean, and i pronounced it like semen |
#6486 (103/248) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<wmf> AaronSw: what did I tell you about Stallman?
<AaronSw> not to have sex with him? |
#7161 (139/339) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<KINGofEXTREME> i forgot cars come in manual man
<KINGofEXTREME> my friend starts changing gears
<KINGofEXTREME> im like what are you doing
<KINGofEXTREME> didnt know what was going on |
#7291 (86/205) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Iced> the IDE cable from the COM2 to the port is fsked
<Iced> it must be that
<NepCHooN> ide cable?
<NepCHooN> your com2 hooks into your hard drive?
<NepCHooN> i ph33r your pc!! |
#7420 (98/236) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<firebrand> damn, i cannot spell today
<A|exander> you just did.
<firebrand> fuck you ;) |
#8501 (84/200) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<cactoid> you love the Colonel
<cactoid> I like KFC chippies
<cactoid> and zinger burgers
<cactoid> the rest tastes ok while you're eating it but it's just fucking gross greasy fried vermin
<Bayls> Yeah, the chips are ace.
<Bayls> The actual chicken pieces are shit.
<Bayls> You may as well sculpt some lard into a shape the looks like a drumstick, then coat it with butter. Then roll it in lard, then melt fat onto it, then fry it in animal fat, dip it in lard then eat it.
<Bayls> I think 10 out of the 11 secrec "herbs and spices" are "lard".
<Bayls> Mmmm, making me hungry. Might go get a 21 piece bucket. :)
*** Signoff: Bayls |
#8653 (122/298) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(ยจ) signoff/#housemartin.. erandus (Quit: If a guy builds 1000 bridges,
and sucks one cock, he isn't a bridge builder. He's a cock sucker.) |
#8695 (115/279) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<spoob> MCSE is to computers as McDonalds Certified Chef is to fine cuisine |
#8735 (122/298) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<arfmcbarf> i'm gonna teach you a lesson you wont soon forget
<arfmcbarf> i.e., how to integrate ln x from 0 to infinity
<arfmcbarf> first you get the antiderivitive
<arfmcbarf> of ln(x)
<arfmcbarf> i.e., 1/x
<arfmcbarf> then i forget the rest |
#8893 (102/246) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nutter> This is what our secretary just said on the phone
<Nutter> "Hi, got Anal Fire Brigade on the phone for you..." |
#9555 (120/292) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<^Amber^> LEAVE MY ILLETERATE ASS ALONE!
<^Amber^> I didn't spell that right did I? |
#10925 (107/257) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<meiscoole:#pc> my ethernet card isn't lighting up and displaying physical
connection. Any one have any idea why?
<munky:#pc> broke ethernet cable
<meiscoole:#pc> what is an ethernet cable? |
#34157 (141/347) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@skape> wonder what a cisco movie would be about
<@trew> "self protecting networks"
<@skape> THE ROUTER STRIKES BACK
<@skape> RETURN OF THE FDDI
<@trew> haha
<@skape> come on trew
<@skape> you think up one!
<@trew> BACK TO THE ROUTER!
<@trew> HONEY I SHRUNK THE IDS |
#34188 (111/269) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BalefireX> how goes the porn site Peppe316[0]?
<Peppe316[0]> I'm getting my clientel up first
<error> does your mom know yet?
<Peppe316[0]> no
<Peppe316[0]> I haven't talked to her for 10 weeks
<Peppe316[0]> it's nice
<Peppe316[0]> this freedom shit is the fun
<error> was it because she found out you drank and you didn't love the lord?
<Peppe316[0]> possibly
<Peppe316[0]> :(
<Peppe316[0]> er
<Peppe316[0]> :)Comment: #gideontech
|
#36209 (67/157) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[@lsd] i'll bath when IRC finishes
[@lsd] can't be much longer now |
#41142 (118/294) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Ne0rC> I like buying snacks from a vending machine because food is better when it falls. Sometimes at the grocery, I'll drop a candy bar so that it will achieve its maximum flavor potential.
<clonak> ....
<clonak> O_O |
#43394 (139/341) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hman> There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than on
<hman> Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large
<hman> elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections, but absolutely no
<hman> recollection of what to do with them. |
#45866 (62/148) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Di> i had to walk down to william st. there to drop off summit
<Di> so on this narrow part of the footpath, this fat, pikey, annoying bitch is walking against me
<Di> so i step off the footpath cos she wont
<Di> she bitches at me then, saying she could have turned sideways if i had the manners to ask
<Kaimera> in her pikey limerick accent
<Di> so I said "You turning sideways would have been counter-productive!" but she didnt get it! |
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