|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..306307308309310311312..599Next> |
#67650 (147/359) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Justin_Meisse> I think I may have conquered my nemisis, the bane of my existance, the evil bastard that's mocked me for so many years
<NoelCower> Your penis? |
#77682 (131/317) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<mr_flea> i read the headline of that article as "scientists develop neural breast implants"
<mr_flea> then i started wondering if they could be enlarged at the user's will
<mr_flea> which led me to thinking about those cars with hydraulic suspension
<mr_flea> "pimp my rack" |
#103028 (66/156) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Blacken> I've seriously pissed off headshrinkers before.
<Blacken> "Well, I was raped by my uncle as a child, I slammed my brother's hand in the oven door when I was eleven because I was jealous of the attention that he got as a baby, and I burned the woods behind my house down when I was 15."
<Blacken> "WHAT?!"
<Blacken> "Nah, I'm just fucking with you." |
#137951 (266/666) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
shawnz> somebody's signature on xkcd forums is "warning: unpleasant spoiler." followed by a spoiler tag
shawnz> so i hit show
shawnz> Spoiler:
shawnz> You just lost the game. |
#151114 (198/488) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<MystMystMystMyst> There's a famous guy who reminds me of you: Richard Borcherds.
<bbot> What was he convicted of? |
#214202 (63/145) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Lightning> my mom and dad put a pw on all my games and stuff except for irc
<Shrink> You could always try and brute force it
<Lightning> i'm not gonna hit a couple of elderly people!! |
#305535 (60/136) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
+ RubberDuck has joined #TC.
< RubberDuck> fuck
< RubberDuck> where the fucks my bowling ball?!?
< ireadminds> uh, dont they rent em?
< RubberDuck> they rent only polished shitballs.
< RubberDuck> FUCK
< ireadminds> well u aint gonna find it here thats fo sho
- RubberDuck has quit (fuck this shit).
...later...
+ Melissa has joined
< Melissa> Ducky isnt dicking around in here, is he? were supposed to be goin out tonite :3
< CoJaBo> He said he doesnt have the balls for it.Comment: (and, yes, their names are Convoy references)
|
#307000 (40/84) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
< Cyber> When I'm on call I always feel the need to drink
< Cyber> A LOT |
#11943 (104/248) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Normandy> I like Pixie's spelling late at night
<Pixie_Pete> kick Normandy SUHT PU 0F0!!!11 |
#13600 (140/341) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Mort-Hog> How do u spell Encylop(a)edia?
<Flirbnic> Insyklepudier |
#14309 (108/259) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Dainichi> I'm going to start a band called Hand Solo.
Dainichi> Our first song will be a heavy metal cover of "I Touch Myself" |
#14346 (138/334) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Lyme> UNDERPANTS!
* Lyme raises her fist to the sky triumphantly. |
#14355 (120/289) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Shelstra> :((
<Shelstra> my poor fishie
<|KazzA|> :o what happened
<Shelstra> nothing but...
<Shelstra> one of his eyes is black
<Shelstra> i think he might be blind :(
<|KazzA|> aww
<Shelstra> we only just noticed it
<Mousey> like it cares anyway
<Mousey> theres not much to see
<staticx> every three seconds it will say 'holyfuck, i can only see out of one eye...' |
#14538 (105/251) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<usrg> cigarettes are carcinogenic, too
<oink2u> actually, it's the smoke that you inhale from the cigarette that's carcinogenic
<usrg> well DUH :-P
<usrg> you don't eat the damn thing! |
#18495 (114/274) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<JessiA> that's weird though
<Kirke> Plus it doesn't even work that well
<JessiA> because Diabetics usually ONLY drink diet sodas
<Kirke> It makes you crave carbohydrates
<The_Vagrant> yeah
<The_Vagrant> my dad can only have diet
<The_Vagrant> but i don't think he cares about the whatever
<Kirke> Not to mention it tastes like ass
<The_Vagrant> i happen to enjoy the taste
<JessiA> hehehe true that
<Kirke> You would
<The_Vagrant> ..um i know i would
<The_Vagrant> i said it didn't I
<JessiA> Vag likes the taste of ass?
<The_Vagrant> no
<The_Vagrant> ass tastes totally different |
#20515 (139/337) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<keith_escalade> If you were a guy, I'd call you Richard Whiskey (Dick Liquor for short).
<Samantha> Shut the hell up |
#21800 (123/297) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
»»»» Now talking in #Counter-Strike.net.
<FirebirdX> Counterstrike is for newbs
« iNothing » yep
<FirebirdX> Only people with small weiners play it
« iNothing » yep
<FirebirdX> Only people who enjoy having gay sex while in fox suits play it
« iNothing » yep
<FirebirdX> Only people who say 'yep' play it
« iNothing » maybe
<FirebirdX> blast! foiled again! |
#28822 (126/304) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Xerox> Heh. Sailor Moon's greatest enemy would be an old man with a camera. "Quick Sailor Scouts, transform and defeat him!" "But... He's got a camera..." |
#28941 (137/333) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* RuKK backs up LadyLia's brain
<RuKK> on dvdr ;x
<LadyLia> ;P
* RuKK makes slight changes
* phox pirates it
* phox writes RuKK a no clothes crack |
#29532 (140/340) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
[DJAngelicon] : I will have a new site soon
[MrHat] : oh
[DJAngelicon] : online
[@US^producing] : Smart. |
#29744 (152/372) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Archr5> Sava, $399 AMERICAN thats like 900 million Canadian Yen. |
#33116 (149/363) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<delmore> i just fucked a chick i know,she squirted in my face, he he, how cool is that?
<@Manyiu> you didnt leave this chan for the last two hours
<@Manyiu> and you werent idle for a min
<@_razor_> so you were fucking her and typing on irc?
<delmore> nah, i was typing when she was sucking me off
<@UncleMart> Laptops are good for that, get the girl in doggy and place it on her ass so you can fuck and be on IRC at the same time
<@Manyiu> this makes this story of yours far less plausible than the drug one
<@_razor_> lolol |
#691 (128/310) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<wankel> Apr 16 17:43:34 mankind.boredom.org ftpd[9720]: zirconium (bogus) LOGIN FAILED [from cv796573-a.hcksvle1.ny.home.com]
<wankel> Apr 16 17:43:34 mankind.boredom.org ftpd[9722]: zoology (bogus) LOGIN FAILED [from cv796573-a.hcksvle1.ny.home.com]
<wankel> Apr 16 17:43:34 mankind.boredom.org ftpd[9721]: zoo (bogus) LOGIN FAILED [from cv796573-a.hcksvle1.ny.home.com]
<wankel> Apr 16 17:43:34 mankind.boredom.org ftpd[9723]: zoom (bogus) LOGIN FAILED [from cv796573-a.hcksvle1.ny.home.com]
<wankel> Apr 16 17:43:34 mankind.boredom.org ftpd[9724]: zooplankton (bogus) LOGIN FAILED [from cv796573-a.hcksvle1.ny.home.com]
<wankel> WHOA SHIT
<mendel> someone tell that luser that dictionary attacks refer to the PASSWORD part.
<wankel> christ, 2000 lines back and he was only in w's :)
<wankel> mankind:~ % grep LOGIN FAILED /var/log/messages | wc -l
<wankel> 8923 |
#1042 (135/328) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<mazix> IAN VAN DAHL CASTLES IN THE SKY 8.99 Genre: SOUL/R&B
<mazix> Released: 12/19/1900
<mazix> Country: USA
<mazix> this song is older then i thought
<SJ7Trunks> haha
<Crom> AHHHHHHHHH
<Crom> MILLLENIUM BUG
<Crom> WE ALL GONNA DIE
* Crom hides. |
#2373 (135/328) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* JosephKer on 2.4.14
<Snarf> exciting ;>
<JosephKer> yup! I got my kernel down to like 600k though
<Snarf> nice ;>
<^xman^> kernels below 1 mb are for pussies
<^xman^> kernels over 2 mb are for men
<JosephKer> hehe
<JosephKer> It's not how BIG your kernel is, it's how you use it!
<BombScare> sure...thats why girls always laugh at you when you pull out your kernel
<JosephKer> Then I set them straight with a good fsck'ing |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..306307308309310311312..599Next> |
|