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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..247248249250251252253..599Next> |
#4779 (142/302) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Lucent> i'm just about fucking tired of middle schoolers named samantha e-mailing me for chemistry homework
<Lucent> without giving a picture |
#4874 (170/363) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<gee-> i stole a 5 dollar pen from officemax and it didnt work
<homieC> your dad stole a 5 dollar condom from a 7-11 and it didnt work |
#5541 (121/255) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* icenine --train &
<j0ker> luck with your new job
<j0ker> :)
<icenine> not going to my job
<icenine> i'm going to go punch a recruiter in the face
<icenine> but close enough |
#6616 (154/327) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Jon^D> I used to pop on IRC at 13:37 for the pure novelty of it
<@Jon^D> and I'm not a loser |
#7689 (132/279) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Phuser> Someone asked me if I knew what time it was today
<Phuser> I said, Yes, but not right now. |
#8565 (155/331) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<TF_Baxter> fucking plug and play my ass |
#8665 (129/273) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<iggypop> if i dont get on tomorrow, i'm probably burnt up
<iggypop> i took the battery out of my smoke alarm for my digicam |
#8734 (142/302) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Walter39: I woke up in a ditch last night
Walter39: Not sure why
Walter39: Family left me, i cant afford pants
Walter39: But on a plus note, I finally won master status at Everquest |
#8849 (136/288) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Balli> the kid in the middle of the pic is getting his ass fingered
<Balli> look at his face
<jaunty> balli.. thats me, cockmonger |
#9915 (131/277) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jag> I think I'm going to print out the Kama Sutra and label it "TFM" so I can leave it laying around work.
<Jag> Not really, but it would be terribly amusing
<ender> Jag: ROFL!
* ender ponders what the lotus position has to do with X tunneling, but honestly, after reading TFM for a couple minutes, all of a sudden I don't really care about X tunneling....
<Jag> Ahh, here's the section on tunnels... oh my..... |
#11068 (140/297) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Zarzig> If i had a cup of liquid nitrogen right now, i would drink it.
<Zarzig> Granted my stomach would solidify and i would die in a matter of seconds...
<Zarzig> but at least my underwear woulden't be so sweaty... |
#11073 (158/337) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<SpunOne> To The Taliban:
<SpunOne> Give US Osama Bin Laden or we'll send your women to college.
<nersh> To the US:
<nersh> Leave us alone or we, the Taliban authorities would not hesitate to cut off America's supply of convenience store managers. |
#104366 (65/135) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<TD-Linux> I have the weirdest dreams
<TD-Linux> like, I finally found a girlfriend in a dream
<TD-Linux> then found out she ran an incompatable OS version o.OComment: Dreaming at freenode
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#122028 (172/372) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
[Katami] I was little and my dads friends dog always tried to hump me and he told me to stroke the red rocket to make him stop
[Katami] and I did
[Katami] Then they all laughed at me for ages
[Katami] v.v
[Katami] I'm from alabama
[Katami] Further more, it was a lie
[Katami] That dog would not leave me alone for shit after that |
#160001 (326/716) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
[while uploading videos to YouTube]
<urbex> took over two hours?
<myself> yep. Woohoo, comcast?
<myself> well, it failed the first time, got a "connection timed out" after about 80% of it was up...
<myself> so I had to start again, because 1986 called and took their zmodem crash recovery protocol back |
#295392 (237/513) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< beoba> i d8ed a guy who couldnt get work study because harvard was giving more money than federal rules allowed
< Sub-Zero> you know, it took me a few seconds to understand d8ed.
< Divine> it's some kind of g8alkComment: #raspberryheaven
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#297245 (146/310) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<MulleDK19> How would I do arctan without a calc?
<HiLander> first, dim the lights
<engimo> put on some barry manilow
<HiLander> pour two glasses of red wine
<engimo> light some candles maybe
<HiLander> and then.. wait for the magic to begin
<engimo> yehComment: #math on freenode
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#298061 (78/160) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* em-pregnated is now known as emily`
< postscript> woha
< postscript> aborted? |
#298648 (71/145) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< Dave2> h*tp://www wristbands.co.uk/wristbands-textag.htm is the bands, fwiw
< amee2k> wtf? they have wristbands that you crimp onto your arm?
< amee2k> i'd feel like a piece of ethernet cable if they did that on my arm :P
< PeanutHorst> you mean you don't feel like a piece of ethernet cable normally?
< fow> I don't. I only have one male end. I'm actually okay with that. |
#301792 (199/429) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<{KHI}DellGuy> ceil, did you check out google buzz?
<ceil> {KHI}DellGuy: Google Twitter?
<ceil> looks like an email version of google wave, but twitterized
<ceil> holy shit, too much web 2.0 in that line
* ceil washes hands |
#303435 (41/79) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Nativehomie> married onijin?
<~onijin> no
<~onijin> I have a fleshlight |
#307354 (50/98) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
rejoec > africans complain theres no water for 20 miles
rejoec > why dont they walk the 20 miles and live there instead
rejoec > like any fucking sane person |
#311005 (48/94) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Analogy> So I just got an audio book, but it was in another language so I had to listen with subtitles |
#33550 (175/375) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<utopian_fiat> I used to have 160 penis enlargements every day before I trashed hotmail
<utopian_fiat> errr.... penis enlargement advertisments... ><Comment: irc.starfusion.org
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#33584 (158/340) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(fleet21): Matteo, you appeal to everyone
(Matteo): I do?
(Tack): Especially the blind. |
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