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#12080 (163/329) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@charlie_x> i have a command line program on my pc called dont.com
<@charlie_x> if you type dont format c:\
<@charlie_x> it says
<@charlie_x> "ok i wont" |
#13607 (170/343) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<NintendoGuru> Yoda of Borg am I! Assimilated shall you be! Futile resistance is, hmm? |
#14076 (159/321) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Jester-> *rapes Eevee a lot*
<Red_Sky> It's not rape if he enjoys it.
<Jester-> .... he? |
#14456 (161/325) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<cix> they're outside aren't they?
<s> what is "outside"?
<cix> it's that place they show on "Discover"
<cix> I think it's near Montana. |
#15031 (171/345) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Whoever>So I'm sitting at the lunch table with mostly girls and the conversation wanders about the usual subjects.
<Whoever>Eventually someone say the word "Jizz" And that goody goody girl with the 4.0 GPA and who is very sweet and innocent says, "whats jizz?"
<Whoever>Silence and muffled laughter ensues, one of the girls says "Its something guys do."
<Whoever>So she says "...oh... okay.."
<Whoever>Next period, english class, miss clueless raises her hand.
<Whoever>"Excuse me, can I go to the Lav, I have to Jizz." |
#15614 (186/378) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<GaRlic> how you like my new name?
<drunkers> it stinks |
#16627 (136/276) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<The_Veteran> remember the reason you are an op DaMo
<Damo> coz I gave head
<The_Veteran> yes!
<The_Veteran> he admits it |
#16657 (136/273) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@drew> saceist is a kind of person who always has that dumb look on his face.
<@saceist> huh? |
#20480 (142/285) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<asshat> went for lunch at the hardrock with a friend
<+mcfly> hardrock... is that the resturaunt where they serve you naked?
<asshat> went to the bathroom, was taking a piss, sneezed, and peed one the dude next to me's shoes
<asshat> sneakers
<asshat> Mark cuban wears Pony sneakers
<+mcfly> wait
<+mcfly> wait
<+mcfly> you peed
<+mcfly> on mark cuban?
<asshat> sprinkled his shoes
<asshat> from splashback from urinal
<+mcfly> BWAHAHAHAAH
<asshat> theres only 2 urinals in ahardrock cafe
<asshat> with a little divider
<+mcfly> thats cause they can't afford another
<+mcfly> but still
<+mcfly> BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<asshat> I apologized
<asshat> and i didnt realize who he was
<morningbell> did he call you a cunt
<asshat> no
<asshat> he laughed
<asshat> then left the bathroom and he sat and read the paper
<asshat> i told the bartender what happend, he laughed his ass off then he told me who that waas |
#29171 (160/326) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Mike468> theres nothing funnier than watching your 13 year old little brother type 'ilikebigtits.com' into the browser in the pc downstairs |
#30620 (160/324) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lizzie-Rei> I'm losing my flab.. by not doing anything
<Lizzie-Rei> actually..
<Lizzie-Rei> lifting wood helps
<Lizzie-Rei> and pushups
<Lizzie-Rei> and slapping guys
<Lenoh> yes, liftin "wood" does help
<Lizzie-Rei> ¬_¬
<Lenoh> and "pushups"
* Lizzie-Rei slaps Len |
#32186 (187/383) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* %Mastas ::MP3:: Kill the Jews - Why Hilter was right! - The NeoNaziNationals :: To get say '!get'
<SGR> erm.. wtf?
<Mastas> what?
<Lokey> !get
* Mastas sets mode: +b *!*@*bb2.33f0f94f.rochester.rr.com
* Lokey was kicked by Mastas (Get out you racist fuck.)
<SGR> lol
<Mastas> pwned :D |
#1030 (185/379) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<iMike> what excuse do you use when you skip school
<c-rOCK> say you have a fat migraine
<c-rOCK> and cant see straight
<Guilty> Speaking of fat and not straight, wheres D1 |
#1290 (169/343) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Wazm> I was photographed in my natural environment today.
<Wazm> some photographers from the admissions office working on some brochure for UNF took 60 photographs of me programming |
#1575 (178/362) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<CoN> ... next you'll tell me that you shaved your pubes under the misdirection that i care
<[U|C]SKS_Lover> eh...
<[U|C]SKS_Lover> hey CoN, I shave my pubic hair under the misdirection that you care.
<CoN> oh thanks
<[U|C]SKS_Lover> then I make socks out of it.
<CoN> ... thats weird
<[U|C]SKS_Lover> human-wool socks
<[U|C]SKS_Lover> >:D
<[U|C]SKS_Lover> wanna know how I make apple juice?
*** CoN has quit IRC |
#2140 (160/324) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<torque--> i can fart out loud in an internet cafe because everyones wearing headphones |
#3779 (160/322) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<nitrifik_> black chicks scare me :|
<Slant> nitrifik_: There are scary black chicks and then there are the amazing ones.
<nitrifik_> Slant: yeah, I know, but how often do I actually see the amazing ones "IRL"?
<nitrifik_> Never!
<Slant> nitrifik_: I'm sorry, once again, where do you live? ;-)
<nitrifik_> Slant: SWEDEN |
#4036 (154/311) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Tragician> MOTHER...FUCKING...FIREWALL!
<mightyflo> that's a horrible mental image |
#4232 (165/334) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ian__> Am I gay?
<qin> yes.
<ian__> ahhhh
<ian__> i knew something wasn't quite right |
#4777 (160/324) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lucent> stupid fucking mirc filling the filenames with underscores!
<Lucent> WE ALL HAVE OPERATING SYSTEMS THAT SUPPORT SPACES IN FILENAMES, YOU PIECE OF SHIT |
#4789 (176/357) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<DrWoody> Look I'm writing a letter!
<DrWoody> Dear Internet Explorer:
<DrWoody> I HATE YOU! DIE!! |
#5263 (139/278) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<DCBastard> wow - either fairlight and deviance have absolutely pathetic suppliers or morrowind has some good copy protection
<DCBastard> i think it's absolutely disgusting that you can BUY a game before downloading it |
#6797 (153/307) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<drdink> WaL-_-MarT: I used to know how to do an overhead page in your store
<WaL-_-MarT> cool, drdink..
<drdink> actually what you do
<drdink> is you take walmart's employee phone off the pole
<drdink> and go get a portable phone from the electronics department
<drdink> and plug it in to the pole
<drdink> and you can walk around the store
<drdink> and they can't catch you
<drdink> just don't leave, or its stealing |
#6803 (152/307) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<drdink> what are c31487-a and cc31487-a?
<drwiii> they are numbers, accompanied by letters and dashes. |
#6954 (156/315) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<glasnost> i just talked to some girls on this hall.
<glasnost> they're like, female and stuff. |
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