|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..159160161162163164165..599Next> |
#6062 (174/313) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<continuum> being disconnected from IRC is like having your head dunked in a bucket of cold water.. it's disorientating and you know things have happened but you don't know what |
#7804 (170/306) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Affe> haha my mom just got an email from adultcheck that was supposed to go to my stepdad
<Ouroboros> Busted!
<Affe> she's like "adultcheck? i hate all this spam" and she clicks on it to delete it, and up comes the preview "dear william (my stepdad), on such and such a date you ordered...."
<Affe> haha
<Affe> she's all like "asshole" |
#9222 (230/418) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Al> vasectomy is a foolish barbarism
<Al> it would be completely unnecessary is men weren't so stupid to keep having sex with women
<jre|away> It's not that. The odd sperm cell can cling to air particles and accidentally get sucked into a passing vagina
<Vodex> like an extraction fan but in reverse
<Al> damn those vaginas, is there no depravity they will not commit |
#10204 (189/341) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Mr_Grinch> i just burned my nose hair
<Mr_Grinch> by trying to smell the flame of my lighter |
#10422 (153/273) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nwinter> i am the king of EXCEL.
<nwinter> kinda.
<nwinter> i used staroffice to make an excel document.
<nwinter> and learn how to make a spreadsheet in the process.
<Lacroix> i bow to your mastery :)
<nwinter> i am now THAT MUCH MORE of a marketable unix admin!
<nwinter> what does all of this mean?
<nwinter> my boss is a retard. |
#11238 (170/306) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Drew```> I really dont appriciate my sister saying "oh, close your eyes andrew, I already took off my pants outside" |
#35012 (246/448) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BigImp> speaking of breakfast, i think i'm gonna order some healthy kfc
<girlmecha> let me guess, the fried chicken goes well with your bulging muscles
<BigImp> there's a good way to reply to that
<BigImp> but i can't think of it right now, please try again in an hour |
#35959 (117/207) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** Join: Garf_LT
<Garf_LT> godddamit creative
<Garf_LT> IS IT SO HARD TO REMEMBER VOLUME SETTINGS
<Garf_LT> BLOWING A USERS EARS OUT COULD END UP IN AN EXPENSIVE LAWSUIT SOMEDAY
<Garf_LT> MORE EXPENSIVE THAN HIRING COMPETENT PROGRAMMERS |
#37341 (152/272) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Zao> It's typo evening tonight, everyone is invited.
<rpop> htank you |
#40712 (201/363) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[GTF] I don't know what's worse; that I dreamed about putting my ex-girlfriend in a woodchipper, or that I woke up with an erection. |
#42479 (168/302) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Les> i hate life
<Les> i want to remove it
<borderlineerotica> it cant be that bad
<Les> from others |
#43510 (175/315) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Syntacs> I don't know how the Allies managed to win WW2 without quicksave.
<@mittens> meh.
< Akamu> Syntacs: They used wall hacks!
< Akamu> Which resulted in the Axis calling the Allies 'gay' alot.
< Akamu> Don't you know your history?
<@Syntacs> Yeah, I remember. "OMFG quit camping England!" -Hitler |
#50186 (166/298) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bjarni> <rhyswynne> can you overclock a vibrator?
<Naksu> i doubt a vibrator has a clock
<Bjarni> I guess they are a simple DC engine, which moves some gears, which moves some weight back and forth in a specific motion
<Bjarni> it would actually not be hard to build
* Bjarni images people starting to try to build their own ones after that statement
<blathijs> only geeks can describe a vibrator using words like "DC", "gears" and "motion" :-)
<Bjarni> welcome to my world
<GeniusDex> Bjarni: is it bad that women start to speak about their vibrator speeds once i pasted your comment about the technical workings? |
#53959 (208/378) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Drehiel> I tried to get info on Jesus
<Drehiel> (16:13:34) -NickServ- Jesus has been forbidden and may not be registered or used.
<Drehiel> But God is allowed...
<Drehiel> Holy shit
<Drehiel> NickServ is an orthodox Jew
<Drehiel> =X |
#56011 (196/354) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<jose3030> I just saved a ton of money on my car insurance by eluding police during a chase. |
#56188 (152/272) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nuttacon> i hate this, i have sooooooooooo much i could be doing..
<Nuttacon> it's overwhelming, i end up just worrying about how to do it all and not get anything done :(
<pentium176> i think you need a lesson in time management
<Nuttacon> perhaps
<Nuttacon> i don't know when i'd have time for it |
#57019 (425/789) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Malphas> How many femanists does it take to change a light bulb?
<@Cassie> Oh no
<Malphas> Two. One to change the bulb and the other to suck my dick.
*** You have been kicked from #Womens_Issues |
#59677 (230/418) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(regarding a text ad saying "Quantum Mechanics & You: How You Can Master Quantum Time To Gain Extreme Wealth And Success")
drw: I wonder if there's a way I could use quantum mechanics to pass the test in quantum mechanics
drw: other than learning it
zee: there probably is
zee: but you won't know about it until you learn quantum mechanics
zee: so you're kinda pwned
drw: well
drw: perhaps after learning it I could use quantum mechanics to travel to the past and tell myself how to do it without learning quantum mechanics
drw: thus closing the loop
drw: ok
drw: I'll just sit here and wait for my future self to arrive
drw: it kinda solved itself |
#77259 (214/388) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
leemur > vista officially sucks
ZoFreX > officially?
ZoFreX > you mean Microsoft put out a press statement saying so?
leemur > netHack dosent run on it
spb > WHATComment: #freenode-social
|
#82268 (211/383) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+Syanda> also, the p key on my laptop just came out =(
<%Slagg> :(
<+Turks> who uses the p key anyway? :P
<+Turks> oh wait |
#33944 (216/392) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Marc^]: hahahahaha
[Marc^]: been moaning that i dont have a desk and have to type on my lap
[Marc^]: got a massive desk this morning
[Marc^]: and just realised
[Marc^]: i'm sitting here with the keyboard on my lap :/Comment: #tekheads
|
#34012 (238/434) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Serrated Sp00n: Holy crap. My dad just told me has a server he's gonna give me.
Serrated Sp00n: And I just saw it.
a restless child: Did you shiver with unadulterated lustful anticipatory glory?
Serrated Sp00n: Yes. |
#34706 (240/438) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Blaine> so, who has seen the passion?
<Blaine> SPOILER ALERT
<Blaine> JESUS DIES AT THE END!Comment: #utopia
|
#35042 (217/395) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@penisbird> people at my school have a very annoying habit of puttin shit all over the cars in the parking lot
<@penisbird> like ribbons or fliers
<@penisbird> they tie ribbons to your antenna and they're impossible to take off w/o some sorta knife
<@penisbird> I should bring my UPS and connect the HOT wire to my car antenna |
#42339 (231/421) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ETR> I'm a CS major
<Spork-> What college?
<prev^ail> how can you do a major in counter strike? |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..159160161162163164165..599Next> |
|